| The Elven Love Snare |
Prologue: She had decided, from the moment she had been rudely awakened by her sister’s beautiful singing voice, that today would be the first day of the rest of her uncommonly long life. Today she would perhaps brush her hair differently or wear a color other than pink. Yes, yes she would. And more frilly pieces. She would sing more, and about something other than the green trees of Rivendell. Not about the sea either because, quite honestly, it was just water. A new start for a new life. Today was going to be the day she fell in love. Even if it meant stalking each and every gorgeous elf in the Las Homely House and that just might take her all day seeing as how all elves were so damn beautiful. She had given it much thought, from getting up to taking the short walk to her wash basin. Those long seconds had been enough to decide it. A change of pace. A new outlook. For once she would not stand in the same room as her sister and be overlooked. She would be the center of attention. She would do things for herself. She would be beautiful and outgoing, as perfect and radiant as an angel. Yes. She would do all things for herself. Just as soon as her sister brushed her hair for her. Peregrin Took awoke late after dawn, feeling wonderfully refreshed. The bed was big and cushiony and the brilliant sunlight behind his closed eyelids was warm on his small figure. It was good to be in Rivendell once more and especially now that it was for a festive occasion. The last time he had been there, there had been that little spat over a golden ring with elven writing. As if there weren’t enough of those in Rivendell. Even Elrond Halfelven wore one and no one made a fuss over that one. Well, not much of one anyway. With a happy yawn he opened his eyes to find himself eye to eye with a large, round dead gaze and a mouth open in dreaded horror. A positively womanly shriek ripped from his mouth and he instantly flailed blindly. The dead fish flew into the air, followed by Meriadoc Brandybuck. Pippin pulled his covers around himself in panic, peeking over the edge of the blanket at the intruder. “That was dinner,” Merry said with a shake of his head, sitting up on the floor. “How long have you been here?” Pippin demanded, watching him as he rose and went for the discarded fish lying on the marble floor several feet away. Merry shrugged. “Long enough to know you have underoos that read ‘Mum’” he replied and he plopped down on the side of Pippin’s bed, swinging the fish about cheerfully. “And to your grave will you take that!” Pippin ordered instantly. He frowned after a moment, lowering the blanket as Merry smiled at him. “You know, it’s one thing to play jokes but it’s a different matter entirely to play them on me,” he said succinctly and he shoved the covers aside and rose from the bed. Merry paid him no mind. “We have a busy day ahead of us, Pip,” he said, swinging his legs which hung a good foot off the floor. “First we must eat. I fear waiting for you to rise I have already missed two meals and I shan’t be doing that again. Then we shall visit with dear Frodo for he seems to be feeling that pain again. Then we will eat some more and afterwards let us bother Gandalf a bit for his fireworks. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind us setting some off in here. We are in the middle of a celebration. After lunch we can look about Rivendell a bit more. Elves are such dainty creatures, we will show them the true meaning of a hobbit. I shan’t be surprised if a few of them drop dead from the sight of us. Why, we’d be doing them a favor, ending their long lives. And then after that-“ Pippin suddenly cut him off with a hand. Merry looked up and the other hobbit was still, looking about and listening. “What is it?” The younger hobbit slowly wandered a bit, first toward the door before suddenly changing his mind and heading for the balcony lining the entire south wall of the room. He looked out the long windows set in the walls and then wound about, passing out through the balcony doorway. And now that all was silence, Merry heard it as well. Shouting. Angry feminine shouting that usually resulted in girls rolling across the floor with bunchfuls of tangled hair gripped in the other’s hands. Merry sprang from the bed to join Pippin at the balcony and across from them, passed another balcony and looking into an opposite room through its windows, two elven girls entered. One was older by a few decades but both were beautiful, slender and fair. And they fought, holding something between them, tugging and shrieking. Pippin and Merry stared in disbelief as the screams got louder. “I was under the impression that elven maidens were proper and gentle. Even-“ “Give me the brush, you bastard child of a woman!” screeched the older one. Pippin gasped, a hand flying to his heart as Merry let rip a sudden snort of laughter. “It is my brush, you horrid wench!” shouted the younger one. And they continued to scream, tugging at the brush violently. The older one seemed stronger but the younger one was downright dirty, scratching and stomping. “I think perhaps I’m still asleep…” Pippin whispered faintly and he turned to leave, heading back into the room. A sudden cry and gasp sounded in unison and Merry merely watched as the brush flew from both girls’ grip, sailing in the air and coming down to crack against the back of Pippin’s head. “Ow!” The brush bounced off the hobbit’s head and landed in Merry’s hands. He looked down at it before slowly lifting his face and reluctantly peeking at the two elven girls. Both faced him from across the gap of the balconies, hands on hips, with the same exact angry expression. Sisters, he decided, as the younger one spoke. “Good day, Master Hobbit,” she called across in a lilting tone. “Would you be so kind as to send that brush back this way? Aim for my sister. She needs a good thump on the noggin.” “Me?!” Merry held onto the brush. “May I inquire as to the nature of your argument, elven maidens?” he asked politely. “Nay, good hobbit. T’is nothing but a small…spat,” the older one stressed, sending her sister a chilling stare. “Spat?” Pippin groaned under his breath, rubbing his head sorely. “Why not tell him?” the younger one demanded, turning on her sister. “Tell him how you pull my hair and steal all the attention! Tell him how wonderfully intelligent you are! Oh, but wait! That would require some work on the brain, wouldn’t it?!” “Enough!” the older one shouted. “From now on do your own hair and complain to another! I will not stand for it!” And with that she whirled on her heel and stormed off, slamming the bedroom door behind her. The remaining elf bristled. “Miserable twit,” she growled, eyes narrowed as she stared off in the direction her sister had taken. After a moment she slowly looked back at the hobbits, seeing them looking right back at her with forced smiles. “What is it?” she demanded acidly. But then with a wave of her hand, “Oh, never mind. The brush if you will!” “That’s hardly polite,” Pippin said, quickly snatching the brush before Merry had a chance to throw it back to her. “I demand an apology for nearly cracking my head in half!” The elf glared furiously, dark eyes glistening. “You will not have it,” she said simply. “It was no fault of mine and I surely won’t apologize for that brainless ninny!” she looked over her shoulder before facing them once more angrily. “For once in my life I would like one person to notice me and not her but of course she won’t stand for it. How many times must she be betrothed anyway?” Merry glanced at Pippin who looked right back with a wide-eyed gaze. The poor elf was surely insane, without a doubt. “One man! An elf! To notice me! To fall head over heels in love with me! Is that so much to ask?” she glared at them. “Is it?” Merry shrugged nonchalantly. “Well, with that attitude, yes,” he said quite simply. And as she gasped in indignation, “Look at how you’re going about it! Yes, elves are attracted to all things beautiful but love hardly works out like that! You must have something to back up a pretty face or you will be overlooked. You won’t be beautiful forever.” She frowned. “Yes, I will.” Pippin nodded. “Yes, she will,” he sighed and he rubbed the back of his head again. “All right, so maybe you will,” Merry agreed quickly. “But surely you would be poor company. A beautiful face with not an ounce of intelligence! You shouldn’t focus on-“ “I think you just insulted her…” Pippin cut him off and, sure enough, the girl was sputtering, her eyes wide. “The brush!” she demanded furiously. “This very moment!” Merry glanced at Pippin once more and the other hobbit shrugged wearily, shaking his head. With his own sigh he took hold of the end of the brush and tossed it back toward her. Unfortunately, he miscalculated the distance and as she dove to catch it, it slipped between her fingers and plummeted. “Oh, dear…” Pippin groaned. The girl whimpered and the three of them leaned over their respective balconies to see where it had fallen. Standing two stories below, obviously taking a delightful walk through the gardens of Rivendell, stood a male elf with long blond hair and dark blue eyes. There was a small grimace on his beautiful face and he held the brush in his hand, massaging a sore spot on his head. “Legolas, dear friend!” crowed Pippin cheerfully. “Would you be so kind as to toss that brush back up to us?” The girl instantly pulled away from the balcony edge as the elf raised his head and she stood horrified that her brush had injured yet another. She sent a wide-eyed look across the balcony to the hobbits. “Your…brush?” Legolas asked with far too innocent a look. “Is it not terribly…pink?” The girl dropped her head into her hands. "I never said it was mine,” Pippin replied and Merry began to motion across the gap of the balconies to the elven girl standing opposite them. The female elf suddenly gestured rather violently, standing away from the edge of the balcony. Merry frowned at her, lips parted to speak, and she made a rude gesture across her neck, signaling his immediate demise if he so much as breathed a word about her. “What in the-“ Pippin was staring as well, Legolas waiting patiently below for an answer and fiddling with the brightly colored brush. “It’s mine,” Merry stuttered after a moment, and he leaned over the balcony. “Yes. Yes, it is. Mine.” And he grimaced at just how pink the brush really was. “A gift! A gift it was, from my dear, long gone mum.” Pippin nearly died on the spot as Legolas frowned delicately up at him from below. “Did you not say to me when you arrived that you had just visited with your mother?” he asked in elegant confusion. “Did I?” Merry asked quickly in a high pitched voice and looking at Pippin frantically. “No, no!” Pippin said instantly, staring right back in panic. “Uh, that was me, dear friend! I spoke to you of visiting with my mother!” And forcing a laugh, “Perhaps old age has finally caught up to you?” he suggested weakly. Legolas smiled up at them and for a small moment his gaze went passed the hobbits to something behind them. “Perhaps. Or perhaps I’m just seeing things.” “Hearing things,” Merry corrected. The elf’s smile did not waver as he looked at them once more. “Indeed.” And he tossed the brush up easily. Pippin caught it, nearly throwing himself off the balcony but when he straightened he held the brush tightly. He forced another smile down at the elf. “Thank you very much, my friend,” he said and, trying to feign nonchalance, immediately passed it to Merry. Merry accepted it reluctantly, staring at it as if it were the One Ring, and he quickly smiled as well, motioning with it to show Legolas that he held it. Legolas waved at them from below. “I’m off then, good hobbits. Will I be seeing the both of you later tonight?” “Yes!” Merry answered quickly. “Yes.” The elf nodded. “Until tonight, then.” And he waved once more and continued on down the path, head lifted to gaze cheerfully at the trees and blossoms of the Rivendell Gardens. The hobbits watched him as he disappeared through the brush and rounded away. Then, together, they looked at the elf maiden who had her hands to her mouth and was jumping excitedly. “Legolas?” she asked in what could only be called a high pitched squeak. “Legolas Greenleaf? Of Mirkwood?” “What in the fires of Moria is wrong with you?” Merry cried, waving the brush at her. “I can’t say I like having my manhood questioned!” “Eeeeeeh!” she continued shrilly, looking flustered. “And you know him! Why, would you be Frodo Baggins and Samwise Gamgee?” The hobbits exchanged a look, eyebrows arched at each other. “Almost as if we hadn’t been in the Fellowship t’all…” Merry sighed with a shake of his head. “I’m Peregrin Took!” Pippin called to her proudly. “And this here is Meriadoc Brandybuck!” The girl blinked, pausing in mid-hop. “Who?” The hobbits sighed as one. “Pippin and Merry, if you will,” Pippin said in a subdued tone, Merry rolling his eyes. The girl suddenly nodded. “Oh, the other hobbits.” “The other hobbits,” Merry murmured in defeat. “Yes, that would be us. And your name, if you please?” “Kahelumien,” she said quickly. “My name is Kahelumien but you may call me Kahl.” And she smiled, her first real smile. “Kahl?” Merry looked at Pippin. “Isn’t that a masculine name?” The girl’s first real smile immediately vanished. “Seems you’re not the only one who doesn’t like to have their manhood questioned,” Pippin said to Merry with a brilliant smile. He thought over the sentence a moment later but Merry was already ignoring him. “Will you introduce me to him?” Kahl asked eagerly. “I would forever be in your debt, kind hobbits.” “And now we’re kind hobbits again,” Pippin mumbled under his breath. “What do we get in exchange?” Merry asked innocently. The elf girl looked confused. “My thanks were not enough?” “How about some breakfast?” Pippin asked and he rubbed his stomach eagerly. “And over that we can discuss this new…arrangement.” “Agreed!” The girl said happily. “I’ll be over in a moment. Now, my brush, please.” Merry looked at Pippin, who nodded and shrugged, and being careful not to miscalculate once more, he flung the brush with all his might. Kahl shrieked as if she were being bloodily murdered as the brush collided with one of the balcony windows and smashed it loudly. The pieces fell, tinkling to the ground, and all the girl did was stare in horror. “Oh…oops…” Merry gulped. “We will be waiting for you!” Merry cried and he instantly fled, dragging Merry and leaving the elf maiden standing in numb terror. “She wanted it, didn’t she?” |
| All images and works done/altered by ShiNoFuriko and TasogareBan. Please do not steal and always give credit to where it is due. |