"What the hell!"
As I walked into my partner's hospital room the scene that was playing out in front of me made my blood boil.
A man, maybe an orderly or a patient, I coudn't tell..............leaning over my partner's bed.........
Touching Starsky below his waist.
I could see the white bandages on Starsky's abdomen, his pajama bottoms were unsnapped and the sheet and blanket that should have been covering him pushed down around his ankles.
I thought my head would explode............
"What are you DOING?"
The strange man's hands were barely being held back by my partner's weak and trembling ones.
Starsky was trying desperately to push the man back and away from him with what little strength his desperation gave him.
There was confusion, fear and horror in my friends face.
"Get your hands off of him!" I yelled at the man.
"Get away from him!"
I tore into Starsky's room, grabbed the man by the back of his hair and threw him as hard as I could into the opposite wall.
"I'm gonna KILL you, you bastard!" I shouted at him.
The man hit the wall, slid down it but recovered just as quickly and ran from the room.
I started to go after him but was stopped in my tracks by a cry of pain and a choking cough coming from the bed.
Starsky was calling out my name.
I turned back to the bed.
"Oh, God, Starsk, what did he do to you?"
"Are you ok?"
The IV's taped to the back of Starsky's hands were twisted around and there was fresh blood around the puncture sites from where the needles had been constantly put in and taken out.
His hands were bruised black and blue.
(Dear Lord, how long had he been fighting to keep this bastard away from him?)
"Take it easy buddy." "Take it easy."
I ran my hand through his hair and then with both hands lightly touched his body checking for any sign of new injuries.
His bandages seemed to be intact.
His pajama bottoms were unsnapped exposing his stomach and lower body.
I checked him out as best I could, then snapped up his pajamas bottoms and pulled the sheet and blanket that was around his ankles back up over him.
Starsky's whole body was shaking. His face was flushed.
"Starsk, it's ok, I'm here now." "Hutch is here."
"Take it easy Babe, he's gone..........not gonna mess with you again." "I promise you."
"Buddy I'm here now."
BLIND FURY pt2
"Huu..utch?" his voice barely above a whisper was slurred as he called out my name again.
He was somewhere between a morhine induced sleep and a waking up state.
Confusion was written all over his face.
I wasn't sure just what he felt, what he knew..........did he realize fully what had just happened?
I took his shaking hands in my hands.
I could feel his fingers trembling in mine as I wrapped my fingers around his.
I held unto him until he was able to focus on my voice and gradually on my face.
Awareness was swiftly and cruelly coming back to him.
"Oh, God Hutch, I couldn't stop him........"
"I tried, I really did try."
"I thought he was gonna..........ooh.......hurts, it hurts."
Pain was beginning to take over his body, the physical pain was coming back along with the agonizing reality of what had just occurred.
I began talking to him quietly never relinquishing my hold on his hands.
The monitors above his bed were going crazy, beeping rapidly in time with his much too fast pulse. The lines on the monitor were jagged and radical.
"Starsk", I said, please take it easy, it's gonna be ok."
"You've got to try and relax."
"I'm right here, right here."
"Hutch, why did he do that to me?"
"Why?"
"What was he going to do?"
"I tried to push him away but I couldn't, he was.....he was...touching me."
"Oh God, I think he was gonna try to........, Oh, Hutch."
His eyes squeezed shut as if he was trying to block out the memory.
The blind fury in me was so close to the surface that I was almost afraid to touch Starsky for fear some of that fury would transmit to my partner's bullet torn body.
I closed my eyes and made myself calm down......at least outwardly.
When I found that bastard I was going to kill him.
No one was going to get away with what that monster had done or had tried to do to my partner.
.......................
Starsky's nurse came rushing into the room.
When she saw me she said.
"I noticed the monitors."
"What's wrong David?"
"Where is the pain, can you tell me?"
"Do you need another shot?"
"What has gotten you so upset?"
Starsky's panic filled eyes darted from the nurse and then back to me.
My partner looked at me, his eyes silently pleading with me not to tell the nurse what had just happened.
Looking over at Starsky's nurse I made my decision.
BLIND FURY pt3
Starsky's nurse was about to question my partner again about what was upsetting him so much.
..................
..................
"Miss?" I made an attempt to distract her.
She turned away from Starsky and gave me a questioning look.
"Yes?"
Her name tag read Allison.
"Allison, may I call you Allison?"
But she was all business, still very much concerned with how upset her patient was.
"He just finished telling me he had this terrible nightmare." I told her.
"He was just waking up from it when I came in."
We were both looking down at Starsky who by now had closed his eyes.
I think the nurse thought he was in pain but that was only the half of it, he was hoping she would go away and stop asking him anymore questions.
I knew Starsky just wanted her to leave him alone.
"I'm ok.........don't need no shot.........I'll be ok.............."
"I'll stay here with him, Miss."
"He seems to be fully awake now anyway."
She looked at me.
I don't know if she believed either myself or Starsky, but the one thing I did know for certain, Starsky couldn't handle talking about what had just happened, especially to some stranger, at least not now.
What mattered to me right now was my partner, no one else.
I'd take care of this on my own.
I would not have Starsky subjected to any kind of questioning.
His fingers tightened their grip on my hands and the only world that existed for me was our "Me and Thee" world.
Everything and anyone else had dissolved into the background.
I didn't care if the nurse was watching us, my partner needed me to stay close to him.
"Starsk, it's ok buddy, it's all over, please try to relax."
"Hutch please don't leave me alone, he might come back and I wouldn't be able to stop him."
I quickly glanced up to see if the nurse had heard what Starsky had
just said but she was already on her way out of the room apparently satisfied
that her patient indeed had only had a nightmare and was ok now.
I turned my attention back to Starsky.
"Shhh....don't you worry Starsk, I will not leave you alone, I promise you that."
I laid my hand gently on his chest and I felt his heart still beating wildly.
I lowered the safety rail on my side of his bed so that I could lay down next to him.
His body was trembling against mine. He rested his head on my shoulder.
I had a very frightened, confused and sick Starsky on my hands.
He looked over at me.
"Hutch, please stay here with me, please?"
I got as close to him as I dared, being ultra careful not to cause him any additional pain.
"Close your eyes, Babe." I told him.
"Hutch is here and I am not going to let anything happen to you."
I ran my hand through his sleep rumpled curls, down his cheeks, and over his eyes.......back and forth.........until his trembling body quieted down and his eyes closed.
He fell into an exhausted sleep.
..................
..................
We would have to talk about what had happened as soon as possible, but not until he had gotten some much needed rest first.
I would have to wait until he was clear headed enough to deal with this.
I felt sick inside.
Didn't he already have more than enough to deal with.........now this needless ugliness.
I was barely able to contain the fury building up inside of me.........
What if............?
What if I hadn't walked into my partner's room when I did.......
What would that bastard have done to him.
It sickened me to think about what could have happened.
Laying here quietly beside Starsky I knew that as a cop I was breaking all the rules, going against everything that I was taught; I should report this incident now and not wait until morning.
But at this moment my one and only concern was for my best friend, I had no room for the rest of the world.
I would call Captain Dobey first thing in the morning and then only after I had a chance to talk with Starsky.
I unbuttoned my jacket so that I could get to my magnum at a moments notice, at the same time praying that I wouldn't need to....
This was going to be a long, long night.
BLIND FURY pt4
I settled in next to Starsky staying as close to the edge of his bed that I possibly could without falling out of it; wanting him to be as comfortable as was possible.
His head was still resting heavily on my shoulder.
His breathing had settled down into the quiet rhythm of sleep.
Starsky's right hand was still enfolded in mine........even in sleep he needed that contact with me.
It made my heart feel good knowing that my friend could so openly and without any reservation put his total trust in me to look out for him.
I rubbed my thumb in gentle little circles over his hand......Starsky felt warm and alive...............Starsky was alive.......and we were together.
There would be no way that I would be able to get comfortable in this small bed, at least not without moving Starsky over some.
I didn't want to do that.
So I was stuck where I was and that was probably for the best, this way I wouldn't be falling asleep.
But with the adrenlin rush subsiding and my body just plain tired from the tensions of the day I did doze off for a few mimutes at a time.
...................
...................
The night shift nurse walked into the room to check on her patient and to turn down the lights for the night.
Her face registered obvious displeasure at seeing me in the bed alongside Starsky.
She walked over to my side of the bed and said.
"Your friend is asleep and visiting hours ended some time ago."
"You really should leave now."
I took a deep breath before answering her.
"Lady", I hissed back at her, loud enough for her to hear me but not loud enough to wake Starsky...............I nodded in his direction.....
"He doesn't want me to go."
"He wants me to stay so I'm staying."
"You have a problem with that you go take it up with his doctor,
Dr. Kellerman."
"I have no intentions of leaving this room tonight."
"Fine."
That was all she said as she left the room without another word, turning down the lights on her way out.
Starsky slept throughout the night never changing positions, his head remained on my now completely numb shoulder.
.................
.................
The sounds out in the corridor of the hospital were picking up.
I glanced out the window to see the sun coming up. It was almost morning.
If Starsky didn't wake up soon , I was going to have to get up anyway, nature was calling.
There had been many nights similar to this one when I had spent the night staying with Starsky in this narrow bed, chasing away the demons and sharing his pain.
We would talk about whatever came to our minds, didn't have to make any sense even to us, but it did help Starsky relax and take his mind off of the intense pain he had to endure while his body was healing. He'd finally fall asleep and get a respite from the agony.
I managed to get my arm out from under his head which had been resting on my shoulder and move his head unto his pillow.
He made a few sleepy sounds but remained asleep, even in his sleep he would call out my name to make sure I was still here.
Stroking back through his hair a few times was usually all it took to assure him of my presence.
Sometimes it scared me..........the total trust that my partner had in me.........literally placing his life in my hands...........
This was a trust that I would keep, or die trying.
.............
.............
After answering nature's call and splashing some water on my face the nagging thought that had been tugging at my subconscious mind on and off during the night surfaced in the harsh light of day.
The hairs on the back of my neck were standing on end.
..........The man that had been in Starsky's room last night.......
had he committed a random act .......or......God forbid, could it somehow
be connected to James Gunther....................
BLIND FURY pt5
But James Gunther was in jail, even his fancy lawyers couldn't keep him out.
There was just too much hard evidence against him in this case.
Starsky was 'living proof' (Thank God) of what Gunther had attempted to do.
That old bastard would have to wait in jail until his trial came up.
But there was no denying the fact that anyone of the many tenacles of the powerful Gunther Empire could still strike out at us with only a nod from the old man.
When Dobey came to the hospital this morning I would talk to him about a 24 hour guard for Starsky.
I was not going to take any chances when Starsky's life was at stake.
I took a breath.
OK, so first things first.......It was time Starsky and I had that talk.
I walked out of the bathroom.
The day shift nurse was gently but firmly talking to Starsky getting
him to wake up.
I was glad to see Maryanne on duty today, she had gotten to know both
Starsky and me.......she had been on duty the day that Starsky had been
brought into the Trauma Center.........she had seen the mass destruction
the bullets had done to his body first-hand, had even helped the doctors
cut off his bloody jacket and shirt.
She had assisted Dr. Kellerman in his frantic efforts to stabalize Starsky for the emergency surgeries he needed to save his life.
I knew that she had a soft spot in her heart for my partner and usually she had a calming effect on him; he felt more comfortable with her than any of the other nurses.
I was always glad to see her for that reason.
But the sounds I heard coming from the bed nearly broke my heart.
"Nooo, noo!"
"Don't, please, no, don't."
Starsky was almost pleading with Maryanne to stay away from him.
She looked up at me, questioning me with her eyes.
Starsky was not completely awake yet and hadn't recognized Maryanne.
"Hutch?"
"Where's Hutch?"
I quickly placed myself between the nurse and my partner.
"Right here partner, right here."
"Wake up babe, it's only Maryanne."
Seeing me was all he needed.
He relaxed back unto the pillows and breathed a sigh of relief.
"Hey buddy, Maryanne just wants to help you get ready for breakfast...you know the routine........wash your face......wash your hands, help you sit up some and fix the pillows up......thats all."
"Ken", Maryanne said to me.
"Why don't you go down to the cafeteria and get yourself something to eat too; better yet bring it back up here and you and David can eat together."
"At least that way I'll know that he'll eat."
She gave my partner a knowing look.
She had spent a lot of time coaxing him into eating his meals.
She knew that with me there I would see to it that he did eat.
"That's a good idea." I told her.
"How's that sound, Starsk?"
"I guess................"
That was all Starsky would say.
Turning to Maryanne I said.
"Yea, I'll do that but will you do me a favor?"
"Sure, if I can Ken, what is it?"
"Just stay with him until I get back up here."
Starsky had turned his head away from us, I know he hated feeling so vulnerable.
These days his life was dictated by his Doctor and the hospital staff.
And right now I knew he didn't want to be alone.
"Sure, I can do that Ken, David and I can find something to talk about while you're gone."
"No problem at all, take your time."
She gave me another questioning look, she knew something was up but she didn't ask any questions.
"Hey buddy, anything you want me to bring you from the cafeteria?"
"No, not unless you can talk the doctors and nurses around here into letting me have a taco or some pizza."
I smiled at him, patted his shoulder.
"Sorry partner, you've got a ways to go before tacos and pizza are on the menu."
"But, I'll tell you what Starsk."
"You eat all of your breakfast, and that doesn't mean 'rearranging' it on the tray;this afternoon I'll go get you a strawberry shake from the Creamery."
"How's that sound?"
I was rewarded with a smile from Starsky.
"Sounds good to me."
By the time I had gone down to the cafeteria and brought back a danish and coffee for myself Strasky's breakfast tray had been delivered.
We ate in companionable silence, each of us enjoying just being together.
I waited until Starsky was finished with his food, then placed the almost empty tray on the bedside table.
I sat down on the side of his bed.
"Starsk, I know you don't want to talk about this but Dobey will be here in another hour and he's gonna want some answers."
I covered his hand with mine.
"Talk to me partner...................."