JOKES AGAIN

One Train which was going peacefully on the rail tracks suddenly deviated from the tracks and went to the fields nearby and then came back on the tracks. The passengers were horrified. On the next railway station the driver was caught: He was questioned.

He explained that there was a man standing on the tracks and he was not moving from there even after lots of honks etc.

The Authorities questioned : Are you mad! Just to save the life of one person you put the lives of so many passengers in danger !You should have run over that person.

The driver said: Exactly! That is what I also decided, but this idiot started running towards the field when the train came very close!

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The little girl watched, fascinated, as her mom smoothed cold cream on her face.

“Why do you do that?” asked the girl.

“To make myself beautiful,” said mom and began to remove the cream with a tissue.

“What’s the matter?" asked the girl. “Giving up?”

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Patient : What are the chances of my recovering doctor?

Doctor : One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died.

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Teacher : George Washington not only chopped down his father's
Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his
father didn't punish him ?

One Student : Because George still had the axe in his hand.

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Teacher : Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?
Student : Brotherly love.

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Teacher : Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?
Sam : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.

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Girlfriend : And are you sure you love me and no one else.
Boyfriend : Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.

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Sam : I hate to see a girl standing in a bus when I am comfortably seated.
Lily : So what do you do?
Sam : I close my eyes.

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