Well, this is the first of many wonderful and surely fascinating entries into this, well, journal of sorts I suppose. I am having some problems with all of this crap on here, so bear with me. Just a few random thoughts:

Krystal, I love you

Anyone reading this who is fearing college, don't. Once you get over the initial fear of whatever you may have a fear of in relation to college, it is just like high school, except too damn expensive and easier. Yes, easier.
Aside from that, I have no complaints really. I just sit around and play my bass, go to class, and sleep. Thats about it.

"What about the rich social life that you could be leading there in the booming metropolis that is IU's rich and diverse population?" you ponder? Well, ponder no longer kids, and know this. Everyone is fake. Your world is fake. All these people, fake. With a few exceptions of course, they are not what they would be if they had their choice. They are the way they are so that they can fit in with everyone else, who is being fake to mix in with everyone else. Isn't that quite the conundrum? So join me in my rebellion against normallacy. Or what is called normallacy by the legions of the fake. Be wierd. Be whatever you are, and do so unashamed. Thank you, and enjoy your sausage.

9/19/01

It is becoming harder and harder for me to justify to myself spending $14,000 a year to go to a school just because of the name of the school. At least here most of my professors seem to be somewhat competent, but that does not account for a $10,000 discrepency in tuition and room and board compared with other colleges. The only purpose in living up here is to not have to commute. I feel no sense of oneness, I feel no sense of anything that compels me to want to further my education here. It is therefore my plan to see about getting some good elective classes, to fill that portion of my major, next semster, and then transferring to say IUPUI or something a bit closer to home, where a commute would be bothersome, but not impossible, and I would feel some sense of value from my choice. This is bothering me deeply, and I will not resign my plan, if it is indeed a feasible one. Thank you once again for your time.

9/20/01

Well, hello once again, my little droogies. It is amazing to me that I write this drivel as if someone other than myself and Patty are going to read it. Well, then, this is your little section Patty. Feel happy and loved. Well, maybe just happy. Anyway, Matt and I had yet another fun filled evening, including a fiasco with a credit card scheme. You see, the bastards call you, and say "How would you like to earn $50-$100 tomorrow night?" Well, hell, who wouldn't. So, we go, and, it turns out that they are a bunch of facking douche bags. By the time you realize that you are about to embark on an excercise of futility, it is too late, and you have been entrusted with a garbage bag full of "goodies", including but not limited to shirts, candy bars, and calculators, and a clipboard with 25 sets of applications. That's right, the schlongs try to lure you to fill out two lengthy pages of credit card application with a calculator. It isn't even scientific. Cheap bastards. Anyway, the way that you get paid is: For each application you get filled out, you get $2. So, if you get 25 people to fill out the lengthy and stupid forms, you get your $50. But you aren't going to get 25 people to fill out the paper. You aren't going to get 5 people to do it. You, as a matter of fact, aren't even going to get 2 people to fill it out. Matt and I each filled out one, then filled out one for each other, then I had a friend fill one out, making our grand total a whopping $6 each. And to add insult to injury, the goat rapes pay you with a check. But aside from that, I was for an hour and a half walking around with a garbage bag and a clipboard, which might as well have been a severed goat head and an upside down crucifix, as I was treated as the anathema of society. There is a lesson to be learned in all of this, plastic masses. It is that you should never judge people just by looking at them. Is this a new concept? No dickhead, but it just doesn't seem to have sunk in yet. So just give it some consideration. Stop being an asshole. Wouldn't that be fun. And I salute you for having read this far. Thank you, and goodnight.

9/24/01

Well, already I am slipping and not writing something on here every day. But, what can we expect of me. Well, I have finalized plans (in my mind anyway) not to go here next year. I suppose maybe I am boring since I am so bored and unfullfilled here, but, if that is the case, I couldn't give less of a crap, because if being interesting is what most everyone else here is then I would prefer being dull. I would like to have a tinge of minty freshness though. So how has your day been, dear reader? Hopefully good. I play bass with a few people up here, and had an exciting adventure in their room tonight. It seems that a TV, VCR, Super Nintendo, and bass amp all plugged into one outlet on a power strip can blow a breaker. And so, as I knelt to dislodge the plug of my bass amp, a shower of sparks (Well, actually it was more like one spark, but "shower" sounds oh so special.) flew out of the power strip and lit upon my hand. A small billow of smoke also issued forth from said power strip. So, they called the center desk and they sent Hector to fix it. He seemed rather upset that we had interrupted his romp with Elena, the hefty but not unpleasent cafeteria woman. Oh, well, he can masturbate with cheese wiz later tonight. I care not. I love wearing my "Super Grandma" t-shirt. People look at me as if I believe that I am actually an old woman, and somehow better than the general population. No one can understand a joke. And that is why the next t-shirt that I have made is going to simply state "I HATE YOU". It will be grand... Well, I am off, as I have Calculus I with Rainman tomorrow, so I must get a good night's rest so as to be able to decipher his meandering and wrong statements. Have a good night, and try to cut down on the bestiality.

9/25/01

Well, it has been yet another glorious day here on the beautiful campus of IU. First, I was too lazy to take a shower this morning, so if any were offended by any incident odors, lick my armpit. Second, after a rousing bout of Calculus, I rushed to meet the bus that would transport me to my psychology class. But did I remember my wallet containing my bus pass this morning dear reader? No, I did not. So, I resolved to spend the day dilligently studying. I did 2 problems on my math, bought the rights to use one of my classes web pages, and practiced with the "band" that I play bass for. I say "band" because we have not yet, to use a rather nauseating word, gelled. So, you see, I am a rather useless lump of carbon. I have now decide to drop my Calculus class, in favor of the much easier finite, pronounced here by EVERYONE as fI-nite. So, I need to try to find a half semester class to fill the resultant void. I am finished writing now, as I must use the restroom. Thank you for your time, carpetbagger.

9/26/01

Well here we are once again. It was a rather uneventful day. Matt and I went and shot pool after classes, and then we ate. And now I am typing this. So,as I had no fun today, you must provide your own evening entertainment. You could save the world, but you're an asshole.

9/27/01

So kids, how goes the good life in the real world, where things actually make sense and work the way that they are supposed to? It's not too bad here. I just found out that I will only be in debt about $4000 by the time this is all over, instead of $10,000 which is a nice change. I also found out that I am not a big enough boy to decide to drop a class all on my lonesome, but must instead consult my advisor, and then get a signature from anyone in the math department. That's right, they don't need to know anything about me to authorize the dropping of a class, they just have to sign the paper. Why? I don't know. So you see, friends and cohorts, that I am in a world of make believe things here, as nothing really matters in the greater scheme of things and no one really knows what exactly in the hell they are supposed to be doing. But, I must press on. And it is with my most humble regards and sincerest wishes that I leave you tonight with these words. "SHUT UP!"

10/02/01

Well, yes, I know that I have been greatly neglecting my duties here on the babble page. It isn't my fault. I have been a very busy boy. I drove to Louisville this weekend to see Krystal which was fun. Apparently 65mph is no longer considered fast enough on the freeway, so I drove 80 all the way down there. Anyway, aside from that, I have had a very busy schedule of sitting around and sleeping. And also finding out that these Fascists charge $2.50 for a can of Sphaghetti O's. That is some heinous bullshit. I am writing a letter. A bean burrito is $2.50. A pot pie is $2. What the hell is going on here. Do these idiots really believe that their products are that superior? They don't even have the option of the big cans. Which, no doubt would be about $5 anyway. I have started out the day well so far. I forgot that I have a Psychology test today, so I spent the last 10 minutes studying. That should do me. I think I may take an archery class. Just a side thought. Well, hold me closer tiny dancer, and I shall see thee again when we meet in the clearing at the end of the path.

10/03/01

Hello once again. There will be a big gap in the daily babble section, as I am going home tonight to attend the second largest fair in Indiana, the Aurora Farmer's Fair. So, I have opted to miss the next 2 days of class in favor of elephant ears and bluegrass. So have fun, and fill the resultant gap with masturbation and Dr. Pepper.

10/08/01

Hello once again kiddies. Hope that you masturbated and drank lots of Dr. P in the interim while I was at the Aurora World's Fair. They actually had some bands that other people have heard of this year, which was a surprise. It was alright, however I find it hard to dredge up the desire to spend more than an hour or two there, let alone 5-6 hours each of the four days. Ah well, it was better than college. So what have you all been up to? Tell me on the message board, which no one signs anymore. I write, once again, as if someone other than Patty, prap's Dustin, and myself will read this. How foolish be your humble narrator. Anyway, off I go for porn and bass. Have a gay old time.

10/09/01

Well children, I write to you at the close of another wasted day. I went to my one class today, at 10 in the morning. Then Matt and I sat around and played Quake III all day long. I had a paper to write, but we can not do one, and so I chose this as my skip. Anyway, I also wanted to do laundry today, but Quake overtook me, and it was not to be. Not much to say tonight really, except that I discovered that I do not like flurries. I like the ice cream, but I spit out the contents of the flurry. So next time I am going to order a large cup of ice cream. Aren't you bursting with uncontrollable glee to have discovered that. I went to a Jazz Band concert last night that was fun, and tomorrow night I am going to the orchestra concert. I am, as the days progress, realizing more and more that I love playing music almost as much as doing just about anything else. I may change career choices from Criminal Justice to slacker...aka musician. But I doubt it. I would be ostracized. And I can't even read music yet, so that would be a good meterstick against which to measure my aptitude to become a musician. Anyway, have fun with yourself, and don't eat the big white mint.

10/11/01

Hey! What the hell are you doing here? Oh yeah, you live here. The sky was black today, and it rained all day. But, it wasn't the kind of rain that gets you wet. It was the kind of rain that just really pisses you off because it is just mist and just gets you moist enough to be pissy. I have found, however, that I greatly enjoy the sound of rain falling through trees. I do not enjoy all the rain that falls off the trees even when there is no rain falling. Anyway, have a good time masturbating, and stay out of the medicine cabinet, you fruit.

10/15/01

Well, what be up in your neighborhood, home skillet. As you can see, it will only be 2000-odd days till I turn 27. I was going to make it until I turned 93, but it only went to 2009, thus, you will only know the exact date, down to the second, that I turn 27. Doesn't that make you tingly.. I bought some hair barettes to keep my increasingly long hair out of my face, but I keep forgetting that I have them in, and running my fingers through my hair. And that freakin hurts. Well, I have to go see if there are any washers open. Chat with you later, chap wagons. I have no friggin clue what that means. I am, by the way, trying to figure out how to get a message board on here, instead of using ye olde guestbook. Adios.

10/23/01

And here it is, for your viewing pleasure. I have been nearly devoured by the two people in the entire world that read this, so I feel somewhat compelled to appease their carnal desires and jot a few meandering quips. Or something, so that I may continue in my metabolic processes. I have done not a whole lot of anything in the past week. Matt bought Dave Mirra Freestyle BMX 2 for Playstation 2, and that has been the whole of our existence for the past week. I got over 200,000 points yesterday. Isn't that grand? I have a message board now. It is on Yahoo, and I linked to it while I was in there under my name, so it will probably be all messed up, Patty or Sean, just tell me if you can't use it. I have changed my major to Biochemistry now, because the fackers here don't tell you that there criminal justice program has nothing to do with the scientific part of criminal justice. So, on I press into the world of shit. I dropped my calculus class the other day for many reasons. First, the instructor is a douche bag. Second, he can't do math. Third, if I got credit for that class, then the one I need for my new major wouldn't count. So I dropped it, and sold my $75 used math book for $20, and bought a set of bass strings. I think it was a good tradeoff. To hell with what you think. I am slowly coming to the realization that I don't really need college. This is a gigantic waste of time and all I want to do in life does not require that I know how to balance a redox equation for chemistry or be able to tell you all about the wave nature of light. It is good to know things, and it may some day help you. And people won't look at you weird if you don't know about Einstein. But who really gives a shit anyway? Why do you need to know that? My answer is that you don't. I believe that truly living would be to do what Thorough did and just go to the woods. Or the mountains, or the wherever you are that you don't have to hear words like "totally" and no one is "all about" anything. If you wake up smelling like goat crap, who gives a damn. Because that doesn't really matter. What matters is that you can be who you are and that you can experience the things you want to experience. I can't really put into words the idea that I am trying to express I guess, because it is something that you just know. You just know that you don't belong in an office cubicle, a laboratory, or a store every day for the rest of your life. That is the most ignorant and weak form of existence that I can possibly imagine. Alas, I suppose that I am one of the weak, as I will most likely not act on this new awakening, and will continue my studies here. But, if you have balls, or guts, or whatever body part you would like to use to signify bravery and will power, then heed this advice, and flee to the Rockies. And yes, I know that that was a lot of bullcrap for one day. But I want to be a mountain man.

10/31/01

Well, it is Halloween, and I am sitting alone in my room, as Matt is at work and I have no friends here. I opted not to go to my Anthropology class today, because I can get the lecture notes off the internet, and the only thing that I miss by not going to class is chimp porn. And, even though that may be a very strong temptation, I have better things to do. Like sit around here. I just can't take this stupid ass crap anymore. I feel no fulfillment, satisfaction, justification, or anything else that would denote not badness. I am really considering the mountains. At least for awhile. I feel the call. It may overtake me. I nearly went the other day after watching Dead Poets Society, but it was really cold. And I have no good coat. Even to be homeless, or a hobo, would be great. Much better than this. I am done bitching now. Bye.

11/1/01

Since this is the babble section, I have come here with nothing in particular to talk about today, I will just sit and babble for as long as idiotic things flow through my fingers. This will be the first time this has happened, I believe, as I usually have something to whine about on here. Patty IS coming up here tomorrow, isn't that right? And it will be fun. I just went to the store today and bought some food. I am sick of having to go to McDonalds or the cafeteria. So I got some TV dinners, Uncle Ben's rice bowls, little pizzas, a loaf of bread and some turkey, and a bunch of juice and pop. what fun. Well, I think that I am all crapped out. Suprised, well then, rot.

11/8/01

Hello friends. I can use the plural because I actually have 2 friends. Yeah. I hate it here. I know you know. I just like to refresh your knowledge. Patty says she may come up this weekend. I hope so. I have resolved not to go to class for the next two days. Why. I can't. I have no will to go there. So I am sitting here. Trying to decide whether or not I want breakfast. I don't. So I am momentarily going to climb back into bed, pull the covers back up, and read The Talisman. Then I am going to probably play Dave Mirra Freestyle BMX 2 some more. Then I will make some mandarin chicken frozen dinner, with which I will enjoy an orange soda. Then I will sit around. Perhaps I will glean some more music from audiogalaxy's stockpile. I have over 700 songs now. Then I will sit around some more. By the way, my barrets are pulling my hair. Then, that should put us around what 3, 4 o'clock? So then I will make some more food. Probably a little french bread pizza. Then I will sit around some more. Probably looking around on the internet for anything vaguely entertaining. Then I will sit around some more. Then I will play my bass for awhile. That will just be strewn intermittently throughout the day. Then I will take out my album of Krystal Pictures and be sad. Then I will sit around some more. This will continue until 10 tonight, when Adult Swim comes on Cartoon network. I will make some kind of snack to enjoy with Adult Swim, which lasts until 1. Then I will most likely go beddy by. Next semester I am taking all wussy intro classes, because I am now a floater adrift in this sea of ignorance called college. Since the beginning of this semester, which corresponds directly with the beginning of an intense introspection, I have realized that I most likely am not going to major in Chemistry or Biology. And it's not because my horrible, horrible biotch of an advisor doesn't think that I could handle the math, it is because I hate the math. I am probably going to do something with computers, and that will hopefully make me enough money that I can give Krystal whatever she wants. If anyone should stumble onto this page, and not know anything about me, which will not, through any course of action ever happen, Krystal is my girlfriend of about 2 3/4 years. We are practically engaged. We have both been poor our whole lives, but she is in college to be a baking and pastry chef and I am in college to mess around and have no idea what I am doing. I just want to make her happy. That is the one driving force for me to stay in college. Nothing else at all. Why are you doing that, you say? That is stupid. Well I don't care. If we are not together forever, then it is off to the mountains, so school won't matter anyway. But I don't forsee any problems. So lick my butt, naysayers. Well, as I have babbled extensively today and am a frail and tired young boy, I will depart. I have to sit around and do nothing now. Have fun, and please try not to eat the paint again.

11/9/01

Hello. What is up. I just got a microphone, so I am soon going to waste the rest of my webspace on putting sounds of me up. Doing whatever. Probably sitting around bored and recording whatever is going on in our room. And whatever. I may do some daily babbles with it, or maybe not. I don't know. The world is full of possibilities. I may get a camera too. Then you could be tortured by sight, sound, and thoughts of the Josh. Well, have a gay old time.

11/12/01

Well, here is the lazy babble.

Babble Part 1

Babble Part 2

11/14/01

Deus Mio!

12/5/01

Another Modest Proposal

Matt and I had a rather intriguing conversation on the ride home last weekend. It involved the abuse of our future children, should they find the need to act like little animals. I will outline my procedures for this education here.

First of all, I will need some sort of small shed in my back yard. It will not have any windows, and it will have only a small vent in the roof for fresh air. The next step will be to place the child into the shed. This will be done at night, so that the child will be both disoriented and afraid. Then, I will tell the child that there is a monster living in the shed, who wants nothing more than to eat the childs brains. This can only be accomplished if the child sits down though, so if they remain standing for the duration of their punishment, then they will be safe, at least from having their brains eaten. Then I will tell the child that the monster wants to cut them. And then I will go out, late at night, and I will cut them, to add creedence to my statement.

The next step of the torture will be for more severe infractions. For this torture device, I will need some special supplies. First of all, I will need four cats-of-nine-tails. For those of you with little knowledge of torture, a cat-of-nine-tails is a whip with nine "tails" which may or may not have small pieces of metal or glass attached to the end. These will, in turn, be attached to a window fan, which will be on a table, situated next to a board, to which the child will be strapped for this level of torture. This fan will be turned on high, and will beat the child, not only hitting but digging into the flesh. Also, this fan will not turn fast enough by itself, so a large shop fan will be utilized to blow the blades of the smaller fan faster. As of right now, this is the whole of the torture plan. Good day.