| 1 | Get hairweave kit |
| 1 | Get vicegrips |
| 1 | Open hairweave kit |
| 1 | Use vicegrips on needle |
| 2 | Use bent needle on handcuffs |
| 2 | Break glass |
| 2 | Go to your cabin |
| 3 | Get spray can |
| 2 | Get toilet paper |
| 3 | Go to lounge |
| 1 | Open fire hose case |
| 3 | Get fire hose |
| 2 | Get kumquat |
| 11 | Talk to Peggy about peg leg |
| 2 | Get pot |
| 2 | Get salt |
| 2 | Get fish |
| 1 | Look at Fifi |
| 1 | Look at fishnet |
| 1 | Look at fishheads |
| 1 | Operate Caviarmaster 2000 |
| 4 | Eat bean dip |
| 1 | Fart |
| 9 | Talk to Wang until he leaves |
| 3 | Get knife |
| 3 | Get light bulb |
| 6 | Make 6 prank phone calls |
| 4 | Read two books |
| 1 | Look at stuffed beaver |
| 3 | Find Victorian |
| 5 | Get mucilage |
| 8 | Get dice |
| 11 | Clear craps table |
| 9 | Open break room door |
| 4 | Get jumper wire |
| 4 | Get KZ Jelly |
| 3 | Read bulletin board 7 times |
| 2 | Get bowling ball |
| 2 | Insert card at horseshoe competition |
| 3 | Talk to Juggs |
| 4 | Press important button |
| 2 | Use card at sexual prowess competition |
| 3 | Unzip mannequin's fly |
| 5 | Find Drew |
| 11 | Talk to Drew about book |
| 13 | Talk to Drew about Fokker |
| 3 | Read magazine |
| 6 | Get Prudish book |
| 4 | Remove Prudish cover |
| 14 | Put Prudish cover on Hercules book |
| 5 | Read magazine in inventory |
| 2 | Replace book |
| 2 | Talk to Johnson |
| 12 | Talk to Johnson about Lime Juice |
| 11 | Talk to Johnson about Gigantic Erection |
| 13 | Enter Juggs' dressing room |
| 12 | Switch deodorant and silicone lubricant |
| 4 | Push button in Juggs' dressing room |
| 5 | Get spotlight bulb |
| 5 | Replace light socket with heat bulb |
| 4 | Push button in Juggs' dressing room again |
| 1 | Look at Vicky's computer |
| 20 | Ask Vicky about the weather |
| 9 | Use fire hose on water pipe |
| 1 | Poop |
| 1 | Tinkle |
| 2 | Flush toilet |
| 20 | Watch Juggs' show |
| 5 | Get chaselights |
| 5 | Get remote control |
| 11 | Ask Peggy about cabin boy |
| 11 | Ask Peggy about locker |
| 11 | Ask Peggy about combination |
| 12 | Open locker |
| 3 | Find cabin boy |
| 4 | Buy pictures |
| 11 | Ask Peggy about Xqwzts |
| 11 | Ask Peter about Passport |
| 9 | Use mucilage on picture |
| 8 | Use sticky picture on keycard |
| 1 | Turn on remote control in inventory |
| 6 | Get passport |
| 1 | Climb scaffold |
| 4 | Get screwdriver |
| 14 | Use chaselights on spike |
| 1 | Use remote control on spike |
| 7 | Give passport to cabin boy |
| 6 | Get key |
| 6 | Use screwdriver on vent |
| 10 | Undress in dark room |
| 15 | Talk with Annette |
| 2 | Get handkerchief |
| 2 | Open Forward Hold |
| 6 | Get suitcase |
| 1 | Look at toilet paper in inventory |
| 1 | Smell handkerchief in inventory |
| 11 | Use toilet paper on dice |
| 6 | Use shaved dice at craps table |
| 27 | Go to Dewmi's room |
| 23 | Win Strip Liar's Dice |
| 4 | Get orgasmic powder |
| 15 | Ask Drew about suitcase after you have it |
| 15 | Get life insurance policy |
| 5 | Look at life insurance policy |
| 2 | Open Aft Hold |
| 11 | Spray bowling pins |
| 2 | Open Lower Aft Hold |
| 13 | Use pot on beaver |
| 13 | Call Annette twice |
| 11 | Get Annette's room number |
| 2 | Find Annette's room |
| 2 | Open Annette's door |
| 1 | Smell big cloth-covered thing |
| 10 | Undress at Annette's |
| 10 | Get Drew out of shower |
| 7 | Get mold |
| 2 | Talk to Jamie |
| 17 | Ask Jamie about Leisure Suit |
| 6 | Use screwdrive on electrical box |
| 10 | Use jumper wire on fuse |
| 1 | Climb ladder |
| 1 | Look at sail when raised |
| 8 | Use knife on sail |
| 7 | Give cloth to Jamie |
| 1 | Read Jamie's note |
| 9 | Model |
| 1 | Read Jamie's 2nd note |
| 1 | Use knife on Annette |
| 15 | Use life insurance on Annette |
| 9 | Make cheese |
| 7 | Make quiche |
| 1 | Look at snake in kitchen |
| 1 | Get quiche judged before adding orgasmic powder |
| 14 | Put orgasmic powder on quiche |
| 25 | Win cookoff |
| 25 | Win best dressed competition |
| 7 | Use KZ Jelly on handkerchief |
| 6 | Use treated hanky on bowling ball |
| 1 | Bowl |
| 25 | Win bowling competition |
| 5 | Use remote control at horseshoe competition |
| 25 | Win horseshoe competition |
| 6 | Ask Vicky about Lovemaster 2000 |
| 25 | Win sexual prowess competition |
| 10 | knock on captain's door |
| 5 | Listen to Robo Bill's jokes (all 75) |
| 1 | Go to about screen |
| 25 | Give captain stock certificate |