Employee Reviews: Key Phrases
Have you ever wondered what the supervisor is really saying in all those
glowing employee work performance evaluations s/he keeps cranking out?
Average: Not too bright
Exceptionally Well qualified: Has committed no major blunders to date
Active Socially: Drinks heavily
Zealous Attitude: Opinionated
Character Above Reproach: Still one step ahead of the law
unlimited Potential: Will stick with us until retirement
Quick Thinking: Offers Plausible Excuses for errors.
Takes pride in work: Conceited
Takes Advantage of every opportunity to progress:
Buys drinks for superiors.
Indifferent to instruction: Knows more than superiors.
Stern Disciplinarian: A real jerk
Tactful when dealing with superiors:
Knows when to keep mouth shut.
Approaches difficult problems with logic:
Finds somewone else to do the job.
A keen analyst: Thoroughly confused
Not a desk person: Did not go to college.
Expresses self well: Can string two sentences together.
Spends extra hours on the job: Miserable home life.
Conscientious and Careful: Scared
Meticulous in attention to detail:
A nitpicker.
Demonstrates qualities of leadership:
Has a loud voice.
Judgement is usually sound: Lucky
Maintains Professional Attitude:Snob
Keen Sense of Humor: Knows lots of dirty jokes.
Stron Adherence to Principles: Stubborn.
Cets along Extremely well with superiors and subordinates alike:
A coward.
Slightly below average: Stupid
Of great value to the organization:
Turns in work on time.
Is unusually loyal: Wanted by no-one else.
Alert to company developments: An office gossip.
Requires work-value attitudinal readjustment:
Lazy and Hard-headed
Hard worker: Usually does it the hard way.
Enjoys Job: Needs more to do.
Happy: Paid too much.
Well organized: Does too much busywork.
Competent: Is still able to get work done if supervisor
helps.
Consults with supervisor often: Pain in the ass.
Will go far: Relative of management.
Should go far: Please.
uses time effectively: Clock watcher.
Very Creative: Finds 22 reasons to do anything except
original work.
uses resources well: Delegates everything.
Deserves promotion: Create new title to make s/he feel appreciated.
(
geocities.com/siliconvalley/peaks) (
geocities.com/siliconvalley)