CHOSEN ANECTODES
Lady : Is this my train?
Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady : Don't try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to Kuala Lumpur.
Station Master : No Madam, I'm afraid it's too heavy.
Peter : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots!
Kirk : Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair of the same at home.
Teacher : Peter, why are you late for school again?
Peter : Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and the game went into extra time.
Wife: Do you want dinner?
Husband: Sure, what are my choices?
Wife: Yes and no.
First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
The girl asked her lover, 'Darling, if we get engaged will you give me a ring?
'Sure,' replied her lover 'What's your phone number?'
A drunkard was brought to court. Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery. The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted,
'Order, order.' The drunkard immediately responded,
'Thank you, your honour, I'll have a scotch and soda.'
'For twenty years my husband and I were very happy'
'What happened then?'
'We met.'