WHAT THE PERFECT WOMAN WOULD SAY

1. You're so sexy when you're hungover.

2. Oh come on, what do ya say we get a good porno movie, a case of
beer, a few  joints, and have my friend Tammy over for a threesome!

3. Are you sure you've had enough to drink?

4. I'll swallow it all . . . I love the taste.

5. God..if I don't get to blow you soon, I swear I'm gonna bust!

6. I know it's a lot tighter back there but would you please try again

7. Let's subscribe to Hustler.

8. I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping.

9. I'm bored.  Let's shave my pussy!

10. Would you like to watch me go down on my girlfriend?

11. Say, let's go down to the mall so you can check out women's asses.

12. I'll be out painting the house.

13. I love it when you play golf on Sunday's, I just wish you had time
to play on Saturday too.

14. Honey..our new neighbor's daughter is sunbathing again, come see!

15.I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house.

16. No, No, I'll take the car to have the oil changed.

17. Your mother did a great job raising you.

18. Do me a favor, forget the stupid Valentine's day thing and buy
yourself new clubs.

19. I understand fully...our anniversary comes every year for Christ's
sake. You go hunting with the guys, it's a wonderful stress reliever.

20.Shouldn't you be down at the bar with your buddies?

21. Christ, not the fucking mall again, come on let's go to that new
strip joint!

22. Listen, I make enough money for the both of us, why don't you
retire and get that nagging handicap down to 7 or 8.

23. You need your sleep ya big silly, now stop getting up for the
night feedings.

24. That was a great fart!  Do another one!

25. I signed up for yoga so that I can get my ankles behind my head
for ya...