UNCLE TED

>One day at the end of class little Billy's teacher has the class to go home
>and think of a story and then conclude with 'the moral of that story.'
>
>The following day, when the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell
>their
>story, little Suzy raises her hand.  "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday
>we
>load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at
>the market.  Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump  and all the eggs flew out
>of the basket and onto the road."  The teacher asks for the moral of the
>story.
>Suzy replies, "Don't keep all your eggs in one basket."
>
>Next is little Lucy.  "Well, my dad owns a farm too and every weekend we
>take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend only 8 of
>the 12 eggs hatched."  The teacher asks for the moral of the story.
>Lucy replies "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched."
>
>Last is little Billy. "My Uncle Ted was a Marine and fought in Vietnam;
>his plane was shot down over enemy territory.  He jumped out before it
>crashed with only a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete.  On the way
>down
>he drank the case of beer. Unfortunately, he landed right in the middle of
>100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of
>bullets,
>so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more.  The blade on his machete
>broke,
>
>so he killed the last ten with his bare hands," The teacher looks in
>shock at Billy and asks if there could possibly be any moral, to his story.
>Billy replies, "Don't fuck with Uncle Ted when he's been drinking."