Pickup lines
Your name must be Daisy, because I have the incredible urge to plant
you right here!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I like spaghetti, let's go screw
Just call me milk, I'll do your body good
Your body's name must be visa, because it's everywhere I want to be.
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your Bed Rock
I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking
to you.
That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be
coming too
Yo Baby, you be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King, you treat
me right, and I'll do it your way right away
I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat
me to it
I enjoy doing maintenance, you look like someone I would like to "tinker"
around with
I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher,
have you seen one?
I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Walmart, so I could ride you
all day long for a quarter
Wanna Play House? You be the screen door and I'll slam you all night
long
If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the
afternoon
Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille name tag
Guy: "Would you like to dance?" Girl: "I don't care for
this song and surely wouldn't dance with you" Guy: "I'm sorry,
you must have misunderstood me, I said you look fat in those pants"
If your left leg was Thanksgiving and your right leg Christmas, can
I visit you between the Holidays?
You look like a girl that has heard every line in the book, so what's
one more going to hurt?
I love every bone in your body - especially mine
Excuse me, do you wanna fuck, or should I apologize?
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light
switch away
Do you want to dance, No? Well I guess a fuck is out of the question
Hi, I'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?
You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy
My recipe for love is one cup of you, one cup of me, nead till hard,
and serve hot
Hey baby, I'm like American Express, you don't want to leave home without
me
Hey baby, what's your sign? Caution, slippery when wet, dangerous curves
ahead, yield?
I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into
this cheap motel room
The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room
for your tongue
Hi, my name is Pogo, want to jump on my stick?
- Is your dad a thief? (No.) Because I could have sworn he stole the stars
out of the sky and put them in your eyes.
- Hey baby. Know what would look good on you? (No.) Me.
- Legs is the word of the day. Lets go to my house and spread the word.
- Lets rearrange the alphabet and put u and i together.
- Do you believe in love at first sight or do I have to walk by again?
- I lost my phone number -- can I have yours?
- Do you like music? (Yes.) Good, I've got a great stereo in my car!
- Excuse me, but I think I dropped something!!! MY JAW .
- You must be tired. (Why?) Because you've been running through my head all
day.....
- Excuse me, Miss...the voices in my head told me to come talk to you.
- (Check the tag on the back of their shirt) OH, I was just seeing if you
were made in Heaven.
- I didn't know that angels could fly so low!
- We're taking a survey and I need your phone number. If you give it to me,
I'll call you and tell you the results.
- Stand still so I can pick you up.
- HEY baby, I must be a light switch 'cause every time I see you, you turn
me on!!!
- I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hands.
- Can I borrow a quarter? ["What for?"] I want to call my mom and
tell her I just met the girl of my dreams.
- Can I borrow a quarter? ["What for?"] I want to call your mother
and thank her.
- You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear.
- Would you be my love buffet? So I can lay you out on the table and take
what I want?
- Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.
- That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor tomorrow
morning.
- My name's [your name]. That's so you know what to scream.
- My name's [your name], but you can call me "lover."
- Nice shoes. Wanna f**k?
- Can I flirt with you?
- Your daddy must have been a baker, 'cause you've got a nice set of buns.
- All those curves, and me with no brakes.
- If I told you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
- F**k me if I'm wrong, but don't you want to kiss me?
- [Grab his/her tush.] Pardon me, is this seat taken?
- Is it hot in here or is it just you?
- Can I have directions? ["To where?"] To your heart. [Cheese alert!]
- How about you sit on my lap and we'll see what pops up?
- I miss my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?
- So... How am I doin'?
- How about you and I go back to my place and get out of these wet clothes?
- [Tap your thigh] You just think this is my leg.
- Say, that's a nice [dress/outfit/article of clothing]. Can I talk you out
of it?
- I hope you know CPR, 'cause you take my breath away.
- Excuse me, is that semen in your hair?
- My face is leaving in fifteen minutes. Be on it.
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