The Strength To Carry On - Prologue
By: Lori (SixteenOzs)

DISCLAIMER: "ER," the characters and situations depicted within are the property of Warner Bros. Television, Amblin Entertainment, Constant c Productions, NBC, etc. They are borrowed without permission, but without the intent of infringement. The story presented here is written solely for entertainment purposes, and the author is not making a profit.

Please do not post or redistribute without the disclaimer above, or without the consent of the author.

Feedback is welcome. Please send all questions, comments or criticisms to SixteenOzs02@yahoo.com

SUMMARY: Mark and Elizabeth's son comes to realize the depth of his parents' love after reading a series of letters Elizabeth wrote to Mark.

RATING: PG-13 (Characters die)

WARNING: I strongly recommend having a box of tissues nearby before reading this story.

BACKGROUND: This story begins in early May 2035, shortly after Elizabeth's death. The story is structured through a series of flashbacks as Mark and Elizabeth's son, David, reads letters his mother wrote to his father from May 2002 until her death. Due to the flashbacks, some parts of the prologue may not be completely clear on an initial reading, but I promise to do my best to clarify everything that as the series progresses.

The last episode that applies to this series is "The Visit." Mark and Elizabeth were married in April 2001, on the second anniversary of their first "date" at the Trauma Physician's Conference. However, Mark was never diagnosed with a brain tumor, Elizabeth never faced the Patterson malpractice suit and Elizabeth never got pregnant.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: The idea for this series began to develop in my mind after learning that Anthony Edwards' contract ended in 2002, at the end of Season 8, but that Alex Kingston's contract continued through the end of Season 9 in 2003. This scenario evolved as a way in which Mark and Elizabeth could be written out at the end of the actors' respective contracts.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS: I would like to take this opportunity to thank Ros, Cari and EpneBelle for their invaluable help in looking at scenes as I completed them and giving me such great feedback. Not to mention answering all of my annoying questions and soothing my insecurities! Thank you so much!!

PROLOGUE
Chicago, U.S.A.
Early May 2035

Mark David Greene sighed heavily as he unlocked the door to his mother's apartment. He held the door for his wife and mother-in-law, then entered the apartment himself. They'd just come from his mother's memorial service. Walking to the mantle over the fireplace, he sat the urn that held her ashes next to his father's.

David took off his suit jacket and loosened his tie before collapsing on the sofa and closing his eyes. His father died before he was born, so for all of his thirty-two years, it had just been him and his mother. But as much as it hurt to know that he would never see his mother again, he was glad to know that she was reunited with his father. She'd lived without him for thirty-three years, but David knew her love for him never faded.

"David? How are you doing?" Leslie Lewis carefully asked her husband as she sat down next to him.

"I think I'm doing okay," he said with a weak smile as he opened his eyes.

"Your mother was a wonderful woman," Leslie's mother, Susan, said with a gentle smile.

"She was," David agreed with a slight nod. Sighing, he quietly admitted, "I don't know how Dad did it."

"Did what?" Leslie wondered.

"Handled losing both of his parents in less than a year," he explained. "This is hard enough, I can't begin to imagine going through it again so soon."

"He had your mother," Susan replied.

David smiled faintly. "Yes, he did."

They sat in silence for several minutes, until the telephone rang.

"I'll get it," Susan announced as she stood and walked to the kitchen. When she returned, she offered the handset to David. "It's Rachel."

"Thanks," he nodded as he took the phone. "Hey, Rach."

His half-sister drew in a sharp breath on the other end of the line.

"Rachel? Is something wrong?" David asked quickly.

"No," she assured him. "It's… it's just that I've never quite gotten used to how much you sound like Dad when you say that, even with your accent."

David remained silent, not really knowing how to respond. It wasn't the first time he'd been compared to his father, and he was fairly certain it wouldn't be the last. He couldn't deny that made him feel proud, he'd always heard about what a wonderful man his father was. But at the same time, it made him feel somewhat uncomfortable. He never knew his father, he didn't know if they were alike or not. He just had to take others' words for it.

"David? How are you doing?" Rachel wondered in a concerned tone.

"I'm okay," David said softly.

"I'm very sorry I couldn't make it to the service," she apologized. "I would have been there, but Katherine is fighting off bronchitis. She was running a slight fever last night and I hoped it would come down so I could catch a flight to Chicago. Unfortunately, the fever got worse overnight and I had to take her to the doctor this morning."

"That's fine, Rachel. Don't worry, I understand. How's Katherine doing now?" David asked in a concerned tone.

"Much better. The new medication is working and her fever started coming down this afternoon. She's upstairs asleep right now," Rachel explained. "How about you? Is there anything I can do? Anything you or Leslie need?" Rachel offered.

David thought for a few moments, then shook his head. "No, I think we've got everything under control. We just need to go through Mum's things. She set aside some things that she wanted you to have, but if there's something else you want, you're welcome to it. Otherwise, I'll probably just donate it to charity."

"We have a horse racing in the Triple Crown this year, but things should slow down a bit between the Preakness and Belmont. Hopefully, Katherine will be doing better by then as well, so I'll try to come to Chicago one weekend near the end of May," she suggested.

"That sounds fine. There's no rush." He sighed softly, but then said, "The only thing I'm really not sure about is what to do with their ashes. I just put the urn with her ashes on the mantle next to Dad's."

"She didn't leave any instructions?" Rachel inquired.

"I'm not sure," he admitted. "She didn't say anything about it. But she did mention a letter she wanted me to read after the memorial service. That's why we came back here, to her place, instead of going home."

"I tried your house first, but when I couldn't reach you there, I thought I'd try Elizabeth's apartment," Rachel explained. "If you don't find any instructions, just let me know, and I'm sure we can work something out. I'll let you go now so you can get back to her letter."

"Thanks," David said quietly. "And thanks for calling, Rachel. It means a lot."

"I know we never lived in the same city. In fact, we weren't even on the same continent that much. But for a long time, I've thought of her as a second mother. I'm certainly closer to her than I am to Jennifer. I always knew Elizabeth was there if I needed her, and I'm really going to miss that," Rachel confessed as the unshed tears made their way into her voice.

"She loved you like you were her own daughter," David reminded her with a soft smile.

"I know, but thank you for saying it." Forcing a weak laugh, she added, "Now, I'd really better go before I start sobbing."

"Okay. Tell Katherine I hope she feels better soon, and tell Rob we're pulling for him in the Triple Crown."

"I will," Rachel nodded. "And you call me if you need anything. I mean it, David."

"I will," he promised. "Talk to you later."

"Bye."

"What did Rachel have to say?" Leslie inquired as David hung up the phone.

"She just wanted to apologize for not making it to the service. Katherine has bronchitis, and Rob's getting ready for the Kentucky Derby, so she couldn't leave. She hoping to make it up to Chicago in a few weeks."

"That'll be nice," Leslie smiled. "It's been ages since we've seen her."

"Yeah," David agreed quietly as he once again rested his head on the back of the sofa and closed his eyes.

Leslie studied her husband carefully for several moments, then gently asked, "Are you sure you want to do this now? To go through your mother's letters?"

Looking up, he nodded, "I'm sure."

"The box in the bedroom, right?" Leslie questioned as she moved to get up.

"Yeah," David replied as he softly placed his hand on her swollen abdomen, "but I'll get it. You two stay here."

"Thanks," Leslie said as she settled back into the sofa. She watched as David walked away with a concerned expression on her face. "Mom, do you think he's going to be okay? I don't think I've ever seen him like this before."

"He'll be fine," Susan assured her daughter, "you just need to give him a little time. He and Elizabeth were very close. Dealing with her loss isn't going to be easy for him, but he knows you're here."

David returned to the living room carrying a box covered in a floral tapestry. He placed it on the coffee table, then returned to his seat next to Leslie. "About a week ago, we were sitting in her bedroom. She told me about this box, that she had some things for me in here. She wouldn't tell me what it was, just to wait until after the memorial and there would be a letter explaining everything," he said quietly.

He stared at box for several minutes. Finally, he tentatively removed the lid. It was filled with sheets of folded pastel paper. On top, there was a white envelope bearing his name in her familiar script, there was a rectangular box next to it. His hand shook slightly as he picked up the unsealed envelope and withdrew the letter from inside.

Dear David,

As you are reading this, I imagine that you have just returned to my apartment from the memorial. I know this isn't an easy time for you, and I wish I could be there to comfort you, but sadly, I cannot. But Leslie is there. I hope you realize that. Don't shut her out.

In this box, you will find letters that I wrote to your father over the years. I began writing them the first night I spent without him. It allowed me to feel close to him, to feel as if I could continue to share my life with him. When I started writing the letters, I'm not sure how long I planned to do it. Maybe long enough to share the pregnancy and your birth with him, maybe long enough to help me deal with the pain of losing him. I don't know. As it turned out, I never stopped.

I'm giving you these letters because I want you to understand just how strong and wonderful the love we shared was. I see the way you look at Leslie, and it's the same way your father looked at me. I don't want you to wait until it's too late to realize what you have together.

In addition to the letters, you'll find a Mont Blanc fountain pen. It was a gift from your father, and I used it to write every letter. I want you to have it, and please remember us whenever you use it.

After you've had a chance to read the letters, and when you're ready, I ask that you take my ashes, along with your father's, and spread them in the waters off Navy Pier. Please know that we will always be with you, and Leslie and our grandchild. David, I am so very proud of you, and everything you've become. You have all of my love, and I wish you a lifetime of happiness.

Love always,
Mum

David sat back and slowly passed the letter to Leslie. As she finished reading, she carefully refolded the letter, then looked at the box. "Wow," she said quietly, "there are thirty-three years worth of letters in there."

"Yeah," David nodded.

"Are you sure you want to do this now?" she asked again.

"I think I need to do it now," he assured her as he reached for the first letter.

TO BE CONTINUED...

I hope you enjoyed it, and that you'll continue reading. This is a very different type of story for me, so I'd really love any and all feedback you might have. Please send it to me at: SixteenOzs02@yahoo.com LLP

June 1, 2001

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