Moments Like This, Part V
By: Lori (SixteenOzs)

DISCLAIMER: "ER," the characters, and situations depicted within are the property of Warner Brothers Television, Amblin Entertainment, Constant c Productions, NBC, etc. They are borrowed without permission, but without the intent of infringement. The story presented here is written solely for entertainment purposes and the author is not making a profit.

Please do not post or redistribute without the disclaimer above, or without the consent of the author.

Feedback is always welcome. I'd love to know what you think. Please send any questions, comments, or criticisms to SixteenOzs02@yahoo.com

SUMMARY: Follows Moments Like This, Part IV

Stories in this series

1. Long Way Back
2. Working Together
3. Moments Like This

PART V

"Couldn't sleep?" Mark asked as he walked into the living room the next morning.

Susan looked up from the sofa and smiled guiltily, "Afraid not. It was either come out here or stay in bed, tossing and turning, until I woke you up. I figured one of us should get some sleep."

"I thought I told you to wake me up," he commented with a smile as he sat down beside her.

"You did," she nodded. "I just needed some time to think."

"Anything I should be worried about?" he questioned.

She laughed. "No, I'm not planning anything stupid, like suggesting we break-up."

"I'm glad to hear that," he smiled. "So, what were you thinking about?"

"A little bit of everything, I guess," she replied. Sighing, she added, "I'm thirty-three years old, Mark. This isn't supposed to be happening, not now. I'm too close to having everything I've ever wanted. I'm not ready to let this go."

"That's why you can't give up," he reminded her. "You go in there, and you fight this with everything you've got. And when you don't have the strength to fight anymore, then you can lean on me. I will always be here for you, Susan."

She wanted to believe that more than anything else, but from what history had taught her, she still had to wonder. Finally, she just offered a weak smile and said, "Thanks."

He didn't say anything as he saw the doubt in her eyes. After a moment, he said, "We've got a couple hours before we have to be at Emily's office. Do you want breakfast?"

She laughed, "Come on, Mark. I know you're a better doctor than that."

"What do you mean?" he asked in confusion.

Grinning, she said, "I've got surgery scheduled in three hours. Would you want to operate on me if I ate breakfast?"

"Okay, point taken," he said, laughing at himself. "Did you really expect me to be able to think before I've had a cup of coffee?"

"I know, it was a long shot," she teased. "But really, if you want breakfast, go ahead. I'll be fine."

"That's okay, I'll just stick with the coffee," he said he said as he stood up and went into the kitchen.

"Nervous?" Mark asked as they sat in the waiting room two and a half hours later.

Turning to him, Susan smiled slightly and nodded, "Yeah."

"You're going to do fine," he assured her.

"It's not the procedure I'm worried about. It's the results," she admitted.

"I know," he said as he put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her a little closer.

She rested her head against him, and stayed like that until her name was called. Standing up, she turned to him, gave a shaky smile and said, "Here goes nothing."

He stood up, looked into her eyes and said, "I love you."

"I love you, too," she whispered before kissing him on the cheek.

He sat back down and sighed. Staring at the ceiling, he silently whispered, "Please, let her be okay."

"Good morning, Susan," Emily said as she walked into the exam room ten minutes later.

"'Morning," Susan replied.

"How are you?" Emily asked.

"No offense, but I really wish I was anywhere else but here right now," she said with a shaky smile.

"I know," Emily nodded. "I wish I didn't need to be here, either. So, how are things with Mark?"

Susan smiled, "Better, I think. He's been great putting up with this emotional roller coaster I've been on the past couple days. There's no way I could walk away from this, and I'm slowly convincing myself that he's not going anywhere, either."

"That's great, Susan. It really is," Emily said with a sincere smile. "Are you ready to get this over with?"

"Yeah," she nodded firmly.

"Just so you know what I'm doing, we're going to knock you out, I'll go in and remove the tumor and it'll all be over in about two hours. I want to do the lab work myself, so I won't have the results until tomorrow morning," she explained.

"That's fine. Let's do it."

"Mark?" Emily called from the door of the waiting room.

"Yeah?" he replied as he stood up.

"You want to come on back?" she asked.

"Sure," he nodded as he followed her down the hall. As they were walking, he asked, "How is she?"

"Everything went fine. It was a relatively small tumor, a little smaller than a grape. I'm pretty sure I got all of it," Emily replied. "Right now, we're just waiting for her to come out of the anesthesia. I figured seeing you when she woke up would be better for her than anything else."

"Thanks," he said with a smile. He hesitated a moment before asking, "So, what do you think it is?"

She turned to face him. "Who's asking? The guy I went to med school with, or the guy who's in love with her?"

"I'm not sure," he admitted.

"Mark, the truth is that I don't know. With her family history, it doesn't look good. But at the same time, I've seen women whose mothers, sisters and aunts have all had breast cancer, and their lumps turn out to be benign. I've also seen women with absolutely no history have something malignant. There's really no way to predict this."

He nodded. She was just confirming what he already knew. "When will you have the results?" he asked.

"Tomorrow morning," she replied. "I want to do the lab work myself, just to make sure nothing goes wrong. I've got a few breaks between patients this afternoon, but nothing long enough to allow me to get into the lab. I've got to go to my daughter's recital tonight, so that's out. I'm planning to get in early tomorrow, before everyone else starts showing up, to run the tests."

"Okay," he nodded. "So, what kind of recital are you headed to?"

"Ballet," she answered with a smile.

"It's Karen, right? How old is she now?"

"She'll be six next month. Dad can't make it tonight, so I promised her I'd be there," she explained.

He nodded understandingly, "How's Danny doing?"

"He's great," she smiled. "He travels a lot. Between our careers and trying to keep up with two kids, it's hard to find time for just the two of us, but I really can't complain."

"Two kids?" he questioned.

"Yeah. We had a little boy, Nathan, last year. He's sixteen months now."

"That's great. Congratulations."

"Thanks," she smiled proudly. "How's Rachel?"

"She's doing pretty well, growing up fast. I don't get to see her nearly as much as I'd like," he admitted.

"And Jennifer?" she asked with a snide grin.

He laughed. "You never did like her, did you?"

"I just thought you could do better. I'm glad to see that you have," she smiled. Then, she added, "Susan's great."

"She is," he agreed. "Thanks."

"You two are going to make it, Mark," she assured him. "Trust me on this one."

He smiled before asking, "How can you be so sure?"

She shrugged, "It's just something I can tell. I've seen the look that comes across her face when she's talking about you. You've got that same look when you're talking about her."

"I hope you're right," he said quietly. "Can I see her?"

"Sure, she's right in here," Emily said, pointing towards a door. "You can stay with her until she wakes up, then just let one of the nurses know, they'll check her over and you can take her home."

"Thanks, Emily. For everything."

"Don't mention it. I'm glad I could help. Just remember, I know where to come for emergency care."

"We'll be there," he said with a smile.

"That's how I know," she commented.

"What?"

"That's how I know you two are going to make it. You didn't even think before you said that, did you?"

"Before I said what?" he questioned.

"Just now, you said WE, not I," she pointed out.

He smiled self-consciously. "I guess you're right."

"Of course I am. Now go. She needs you," Emily said as she gave him a light shove in the direction of Susan's room.

Entering the room, he walked over to her and pulled a chair next to the bed as he sat down. He gently brushed her hair back from her face before taking her hand in his. For the first time in nearly two days she looked relaxed. As he watched her sleep, his mind wondered back through the memories of everything they'd done together, everything that had gotten them to this point. She hadn't been back that long. They were both happy just enjoying what they'd found, and they'd never really discussed the future. But he'd always assumed she'd be there.

He thought back to the day they met. He was an intern and she was a third year med student. That day, he never imagined they'd end up here. He was married and had no desire to cheat on Jennifer. He was also Susan's instructor, and everyone knew getting involved with a student was a bad idea. But that didn't stop them from becoming friends.

Today, he knew he'd never felt anything like he did when he was with her. It truly felt like she was the piece that made his life complete. He'd shared more with her than he had with anyone else.

With his free hand, he gently caressed her cheek. "We've come too far, Susan," he whispered. "This can't destroy us. Not now."

He completely lost track of time when he was with her, so he wasn't sure how long he'd been sitting there before he felt the light pressure on his hand.

She opened her eyes slowly. Looking around the room, she tried to figure out exactly where she was, and why she was there. As her eyes finally came to rest on Mark, it all came back to her. The tumor, the biopsy.

"Mark? What are you doing here?" she asked groggily.

"Emily thought you might like for me to be here when you woke up," he explained.

"She was right," she said, managing a weak smile.

He gently brushed her hair back and asked, "How are you feeling?"

"Like I've been drugged," she replied.

"That's probably because you were," he suggested with a smile.

She laughed slightly before asking, "How'd it go?"

"Emily said the tumor was small, and she thinks she got all of it. She's going to do the labs tomorrow morning," he explained.

"One more question," she began.

"When can you get out of here?" he finished for her.

Smiling, she nodded, "Yeah."

"I'm supposed to get a nurse when you wake up, so they can check you over before they let you leave."

"So, what are you waiting for?" she asked. "Go get the nurse."

"Okay, okay, I'm going," he laughed as he stood up.

Susan leaned on Mark as they stepped off the elevator and walked down the hall. She was still a bit light-headed from the anesthesia.

"You should probably lay down for a while," he suggested as he unlocked the door.

"Okay," she replied quietly as they walked inside.

He raised an eyebrow, "What? No argument?"

She smiled weakly, "Nope. Actually, I'll probably be lucky if I don't fall asleep while I'm changing clothes."

"Now that could be very interesting," he said with a grin as he dropped his keys on the table.

She was walking towards the bedroom. Reaching the doorway, she turned back, "Cute, Greene. Very cute."

As the door closed he laughed to himself and said, "Well, I thought it was funny."

He walked to the bedroom and knocked softly, "Is there anything I can get for you?" he asked.

He was taken aback when she opened the door quickly, then rushed past him.

"Susan, what's wrong?" he asked, following her into the bathroom.

She started throwing-up almost immediately. When she stopped, he asked, "Are you okay?"

She was still sitting on the floor next to the toilet. She looked up at him and glared as if to say, "Do I look like I'm okay?"

He got her message, gave a guilty smile and said, "Stupid question, huh?"

"Yes," she replied sarcastically.

He reached for a washcloth near the sink, then ran cool water over it. Sitting on the floor next to her, he gently wiped her face. "What was the last thing you had to eat?" he asked.

She thought for a moment, then said, "The sundae we split last night after dinner."

He looked at his watch, then shook his head, "No, that shouldn't be it. It's been over fifteen hours." He thought for a moment before asking, "Have you ever had surgery before?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "They always use Novocaine for any dental work. I had stitches once in college, but I've never had surgery."

He felt her forehead, "You're burning up." He stood up and reached for the thermometer in the medicine cabinet.

A few minutes later, she checked the thermometer. "One hundred point five," she reported, looking anxiously at Mark. Before she could say anything another wave of nausea swept over her. He sat next to her and held her hair back as she continued to throw-up.

She sat up and took a deep breath. "Post-operative nausea and a fever. An allergic reaction to the anesthesia?" she suggested.

"That's what I'm thinking," he nodded. "I'm going to call Emily to see if she can prescribe some Compazine. Why don't you stay here?"

"Okay," she nodded as she leaned against the bathroom wall, resting her head against the cool tiles.

He stood at the door and watched her for a moment. He had always considered her to be one of the strongest women he knew. It was that strength that made her a great ER doctor and earned his respect. Over the years, that respect had grown into friendship, and eventually love. Only now, he saw that she was scared and vulnerable. He only hoped that he could give her the strength she needed. Drawing in a deep breath, he headed into the living room for the phone.

She closed her eyes as she leaned against the wall. She took several slow, deep breaths, trying to relax. It didn't seem to work too well. She felt awful, but in the back of her mind, she knew this was mild compared to the side-effects of chemotherapy or radiation.

Did she really want to put herself through that? Then again, how could she not? She had too much to live for, too much left to do. She had Mark, she wanted a family. In her heart, she knew she couldn't give that up without one hell of a fight. A determined smile slowly crossed her lips as she thought, "Susan, you've never been a quitter. This is definitely not the time to start."

Mark returned a few minutes later. Crouching beside her, he said, "I called Emily. She said she's got some time free this afternoon and she'll bring the Compazine over."

"Not soon enough," she replied.

He smiled sympathetically, "Feeling any better?"

"Not really."

"Why don't you take a cool shower? It might make you feel better, and it would probably help lower your temperature."

"That's not a bad idea," she replied.

He stood up and extended his hand to help her up. Her balance was shaky as she stood, so he placed his other hand on her waist to steady her. His face filled with concern, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," she nodded, "I just stood up too fast."

"Are you sure?" he asked again.

"I'm fine, Mark. I promise. Now get out of here and let me take a shower," she said with a smile.

He returned her smile as he turned to leave the room. Stopping, he turned back and said, "I know this may be a stupid question, but would you like anything to eat?"

"No," she said, shaking her head, "but thanks for the offer."

He was reading the newspaper when she came out of the bathroom about twenty minutes later. Looking up, he asked, "How do you feel?"

"Mark, I've thrown-up three times in the last hour. I feel like crap," she said sarcastically.

"Here we go again," he thought to himself. He couldn't say that he understood what she was going through, because he didn't. But if she needed to vent some of the frustration she was feeling, he was willing to take it. Especially if it helped her deal with everything.

He wasn't exactly sure how he should respond, so he just watched her for a moment or two. A strange thought crossed his mind, and he couldn't help but smile. If she knew what he was thinking, she'd probably kill him.

"What's so funny?" she demanded, noticing his smile.

"Nothing," he said solemnly. Meanwhile, he was thinking, "Oh boy, I'm a dead man."

"No, what is it?" she asked again.

Maybe, just maybe, she'd find it amusing. "I was just thinking that if I didn't know better, I'd say you were pregnant," he said nervously.

"What?" she snapped.

"Well, between the nausea and the mood swings," he said with a smile.

As she stared at him, she wanted to be mad, but she just gave up on that after seeing his smile. Deciding to play along, she said, "That would be fairly impressive. Especially since I haven't had sex in about two and a half years."

That definitely was NOT the response he had been expecting. Two and a half years? He quickly thought back, then asked, "Cvetic?"

She smiled and nodded, "Yeah."

"Wow," he said quietly.

"Come on, Mark. You're not THAT surprised, are you?"

"In a way, yeah, I guess I am," he admitted.

"Think about it for a minute," she said. "It wasn't too long after Div left that I got caught up in that whole fiasco with Kayson. Then Chloe reappeared and had the baby. After Chloe left, I was taking care of Susie, and how many guys want to go out with a woman who has a baby?" she asked rhetorically.

"What about last summer?" he asked, referring to the time after Chloe moved to Phoenix with Susie.

"Sure, I went on enough blind dates, but must of them didn't even make it to a second date, much less into my bed. Honestly, the closest I probably came was when I invited you to Maui," she grinned.

He laughed, "I didn't even find out that you really wanted me to go until the day you told me you were moving. Carol told me that morning as we were walking into work."

"You did better than I did. I didn't find out you were planning to say yes until the day I moved back to Chicago. Doug mentioned it after he picked me up from the station."

"You're kidding, right?" he asked.

"No," she said, shaking her head. "I always thought you were mortified by the invitation. That's why I sort of withdrew it before I left work that day."

"Surprised? Yes. Flattered? Probably. But I definitely was not mortified," he said with a laugh. "You know what this means, don't you?"

She thought for a second, then smiled, "If Doug and Carol had been a little faster in relaying this information, we would have probably gone on vacation together and I probably wouldn't have moved to Phoenix. In general, they would have saved everyone a lot of grief last winter."

"That's what I was thinking," he said as they laughed at the irony.

A devilish smile crossed her face as she said, "So, now that we've discussed my sex life, I think it's your turn."

He shifted uncomfortably as he realized there was no way to avoid her question. He finally answered, "Heather Morgan, in February. She was a patient at the hospital, we dated for a few weeks."

She heard most of this story from Doug and Carol, including how he once set up three dates for the same night. After all three women showed up at the hospital, and dumped him, he ended up going out to dinner with Doug. Deciding to have a little fun, she teased, "Anyone else I should know about?"

He was really starting to regret the way he acted after she left. He wished he didn't have to tell her about those months, but he wouldn't lie to her. "After Christmas, I dated Chuny for a while," he said, not quite looking her in the eye.

"Chuny Marquez?" she asked in surprise. This was the first she'd heard of this relationship.

"Yeah," he nodded.

She was jealous, but she couldn't figure out exactly why. She knew she really didn't have a right to be. She was the one that left. He never expected to see her again, and he was free to do whatever he wanted. Still, she had to admit that she did not like it.

When she didn't say anything, he tried to explain. "Looking back, I guess it was pretty much a rebound relationship. I never even realized it at the time. In fact, Carol was the only one who ever called me on it."

"What do you mean?" she asked, sounding slightly confused.

"One day, the three of us were in the lounge. After Chuny left, Carol commented that she was really nice and I agreed. Then Carol asked if I'd heard from you. Instead of just saying no, I got defensive. I told her that if she thought I was just reacting to your leaving, she was completely wrong. She said she was completely wrong. Of course, she wasn't wrong. She was closer to the truth than I was willing to admit at the time," he said, laughing at himself.

She laughed, too. "Is there anyone else I should know about?" she asked seriously.

"No," he said shaking his head. "I went on dates with a few other women, but those were the only two I slept with."

"I just want to make sure that we are clear on one thing. If you EVER three-time me, I'll have to kill you," she said, only half-joking.

"Don't worry," he said seriously. "You are the ONLY woman I ever want to be with."

She smiled and moved closer to him. Right before their lips met, she whispered, "Good answer."

The kiss ended and she rested her head on his shoulder. Cautiously, he asked, "How do you feel?"

She smiled, "I've been better. I'm just tired."

"You should go lay down," he suggested.

She grinned before saying, "One condition."

He grinned back, already knowing what it was. Yet he still asked, "What's that?"

"You'll hold me?" she said softly.

"You got it."

As they were laying in bed, she rested her head on his shoulder, he wrapped his arm around her back. "You never liked Div, did you?" she asked quietly.

He was a little surprised by her question, but he answered honestly, "No, not really."

"Why?" she asked curiously.

He thought for a minute, then said, "He never realized how lucky he was because he had you. I saw the way he treated you at the hospital. He didn't even seem to respect you as a doctor and a colleague, so I couldn't understand how he could care about you as a person. You deserve more than that."

"So, why didn't you tell me this back then?" she teased.

"In a way, I think I tried, but it really wasn't my place and I knew you cared about him. I guess I hoped I was wrong, for your sake," he explained.

"Some things you just have to learn on your own, right?" she asked as she tried to stifle a yawn.

He smiled as he said, " Right. Now, you need to get some sleep."

"Okay, I'm too tired to argue," she said as she shifted slightly into a more comfortable position.

He watched her as she drifted off to sleep, studying her face, attempting to memorize every detail, never wanting to forget this moment.

He stayed with her for almost an hour. He considered going to sleep himself, but his thoughts were racing. As he got up, he gently slid his arm out from under her and kissed her forehead.

He went into the living room and decided it was time to stop sitting around waiting. He wanted answers.

TO BE CONTINUED...

I'd love to know what you think. Please send all feedback to SixteenOzs02@yahoo.com

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