| You probably all know already about the House passing the "faith-based" bill, and the results were 233 "yea" and 198 "nay". A minor victory, I hope. It's still not known what will happen in the Senate, but I'll update this as soon as I find out. None of this "waiting a week" crap like I did this time. |
| Hell in a Hand Basket (7/22/01) |
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| The Aftermath... (9/13/01) |
| I know it's been awhile, but there's finally some news worth mentioning. Unless you've been in a coma since before Tuesday, you know about the attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. And you've probably noticed the public prayers and all the God talk that has sprung up as a result. First, there's the reporter on CNN talking about how we all "turn to a higher power in times like these." Uh, yeah, sure we do. Then, there's the "prayer vigil" on the steps of the Capitol (basically one old pile of clothing after another getting in front of a microphone and praying so people will like them). The worst part of this was the jackass who said "Without faith in God above, one is completely powerless." How nice. Times like this, and all people come together...except atheists, who cares about them? This guy said that I'm powerless because I don't believe in a higher power. Of course, I am powerless. Anyone who isn't in government is powerless right now, but that has nothing to do with my theological position. And of course, Bush is declaring another national day of prayer for tomorrow. Apparently, God didn't pay any attention to the first one, so we're reminding him. Why is it when something bad happens, people find it necessary to turn to a fictional man in the sky? Not only that, but they disregard and even insult those who don't believe in the man in the sky, or at least not their invisible man. I stand behind my country, but it's not easy when Congress says I'm weak and the President doesn't think I should even be considered a citizen. |
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| Jews and Christians are Covered, Everyone Else is Screwed (10/17/01) |
| Once again, the politicians are proving that they are puppets for the religious right. The House of Representatives today showed their approval (404 - 0) of public schools posting "God Bless America" everywhere, saying that it "shows support for the nation". Yeah, I support the nation. But I don't believe in gods. So what about me, or the 25 million or so others like me? Not to mention the numbers of people who practice polytheistic religions... The major sponsor of this event was one Henry Brown (R - S.C.), who said, "To threaten a public school for showing the same type of patriotism we all showed on the Capitol steps is the opposite of what this country is all about." They showed patriotism on the steps of the Capitol? Funny, I thought they just sang a song to show off for the camera...very humble, these politicians. The ACLU has refused to comment, although the Rev. Barry Lynn (from Americans United for the Separation of Church and State) stated that he was disappointed that the House would devote time "to a resolution like this when our country faces critical issues of national security such as airline safety and bioterrorism. What P.O.'s me about the phrase "God Bless America" is it makes me want to ask "Which God?" The United States is a nation of many faiths and many gods. You'd think they would want to approve a slogan that celebrates our country's diversity, not one that just caters to the majority. |
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| Your Prophet Was a Pedophile, Nyah Nyah! (6/14/02) |
| Hurrah! The news section is reborn, and it's not the slighest bit moldy....though it is looking a little black around the edges.... What I want to cover today is this crap about the Reverend Jerry Vine, and then give a rundown of what happened on CNN's Crossfire.. Vine's speech at the Southern Baptist convention earlier this week included the following line: "Islam was founded by Mohammed, a demon - possesed pedophile who had twelve wives, and his last one was a nine year old girl!" What's the matter, Jerry? Are you jealous? He then added, "Allah is not Jehovah. Jehovah is not going to turn you into a terrorist that will bomb people." Has this guy never heard of Eric Rudolph? And if he can't represent all Christians, Al Quada can't represent all Muslims. So what happens? On the June 12th episode of Crossfire, there is a discussion between Hussien Ibish, who works for the American-Arab Anti-Discrimination Commitee, and....Jerry Falwell. You read that correctly. Jerry Falwell. The plot immediately thickens, and we all remind our selves not to take a drink until the first commercial break, or maybe just keep a mop and some paper towels nearby. After a lot of childish insults and attacks (with Falwell not being able to get off the subject of pedophilia), Falwell alleged that Ibish new nothing of the history of his own religion (since Ibish had taken umbrage to the allegations that all Muslims are terrorists), and immediately gave Ibish a "lesson" in the history of Islam. Following this, the two hosts turned to Falwell, and pointed out his remarks concerning September 11th, reminding him that this sounded an awful lot like Osama Bin Laden. Falwell immediately dodged this, and began talking about pedophilia again. I think Jerry Falwell is developing an obsession here. After the hosts showed a video clip of George Bush saying "Islam is about peace", they asked Falwell whether Bush or Vines was correct about Islam, to which Falwell replied: "I don't think either one. I don't think that George Bush or Jerry Vines believes that 1.3 Muslims are terrorists. Nobody has said that. He is saying, Dr. Vines is saying, that Mohammed did have among his wives in fact a nine-year-old wife...." And there we go again. When you get cornered in one argument, immediately switch to the one that you haven't been cornered in yet. I should study debate under Jerry Falwell. By this time, they were out of time, and began talking about the White House, cutting poor Ibish off in mid-sentence. Ain't that always the way? But, once again, Jerry Falwell has proven himself to be nothing more than a laughing stock of fundamentalist Chritianity. |
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| Thanks a Lot (7/18/02) |
| Something I never covered in this news section is the whole controversy surrounding the Pledge of Allegiance. And I also haven't covered the sudden rise of attacks on freethinkers....until now. First of all, I'd just like to ask one thing: Why is the pledge so important? I've never liked to the pledge. Most likely, you learned the pledge the same way I did back in Kindergarten....as a sort of a little song to memorize. It's almost like brainwashing. I didn't know what it meant, but I knew I had to say it. This is why I don't like the pledge: Not only should a person not be made to pledge his or her allegiance to this country, but this person might also feel as I do: That a pledge of any kind is a personal thing, and we should each have one of our own. Does remembering a little sing-song diddy make us actually have allegiance to the flag? Of course not. I freely pledge allegiance to this flag, but in my own way. I love this country, but I don't have to memorize a short speech just to tell the world about it. Mainly because it's nobody's business but my own. I think I've just made my position clear. If you want to write up to tell me I'm a bad American as a result of this, feel free. Prepared to be laughed at. But back to the subject: Who do we have to thank for all of these wonderful people and their messages of love for freethinkers? Well, there are several people. Take Michael Newdow, for example. While I'm sure his intentions were good, he has succeeded in doing nothing but turning the entire country against atheists. On top of that, he actually used his daughter in the case, who happens to be a Christian. So now to the rest of the world, it's the evil atheist parent forcing his Christian daughter to join his cause, a la Madalyn Murraye O'Hare. Just what the world needs: Another ultra-belligerent atheist. Thanks, Mikey. Thanks a lot. Then there are these judges who rule in Newdow's favor, and rule the entire Pledge of Allegiance unconstitutional. While I honestly don't care (and am even glad in a way), they have just made the entire nation turn not only against them, but me and all other atheists as well. Thanks, judges. Thanks a lot. All the loudmouth pricks in this hemisphere, from Pat Buchanan to Dennis Miller, are wasting absolutely no time bashing the decision, acting like we won't be able to win the "war" we are currently in without "under God" in our diddy of a pledge, despite the fact that we won both World Wars without it, and they're upping the throttle on their motor-mouths, letting the shit fly more freely from their lips than ever before. Thanks, celebrities. Thanks a lot. Newspaper columnists, both local and syndicated, are writing one insulting editorial after another, one in World Net Daily called "Separation of Atheism and State". You can probably guess what kind of article that is. The columns and news programs that do as little to even act neutral toward the subject are few and far between. Thanks, journalists. Thanks a lot. So while the rest of the world looks at America still trying to figure out exactly what the hell our problem is, here we are arguing and persecuting a minority. That's right, persecuting. How in the hell else could journalists and celebrities say this sort of garbage without being kicked off the face of the planet? If this sort of thing had happened to any other group of people this would be the case, but not with the atheists. Because no matter how politically correct this country is, everyone agrees that sympathy for someone who sees no evidence in a god is too politically correct. And the way I see it, we have these people to thank. Once again, thank you all. Thanks a lot. |
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| About Time (11/18/02) |
| It was finally decided today by a higher court that Alabama Justice Roy Moore's infamous two and a half ton "Ten Commandments" monument violates the separation of church and state, and Moore currently has 10 days to get it the hell out of his courthouse. Moore has responded by saying the Ten Commandments are the basis for our laws (gee, they're STILL using that one?), but naturally has done nothing but complain. After all, at this juncture that's all he can do. Let's see if you places "God's Laws" ahead of "Man's Laws". I hope he does, that way we'll never hear from him again. |
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| Sign Says "Sex", Preacher Has Puppies (1/17/03) |
| In the little slice of America known as Stewartville, Minnesota, a local shop known as "Pure Pleasure" has started a hubbub by attempting to target the local demographic. Pure Pleasure, you see, sits right across the the Midwest Baptist Church. Somehow I doubt the two have been peacefully co-existing up until now, but now there's.....The Sign. A double-sided sign in full view of those passing on the road. On one side: "And God said go out into the world and have great sex. God's gift to women. Amen and amen." On the other side: "No need to mail order. Gay videos in stock. Clergy discount. Have good sex. Hallelujah!" You can probably imagine the church's reaction. Keep in mind that these people are Baptists, so it's something along the lines of "explosive". Big enough for CNN to cover it, anyway, not that that's saying much. "This sign shows me that he's not only thumbing his nose at the laws of the township, he's thumbing his nose at the laws of God," says the very clever Reverend Grimaldi, leader of the flock. "I just hope I'm not too close when the lightning strikes." I guess the discount just wasn't big enough. |
| Keep an Eye on This Guy (4/15/03) |
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| More news-making goodness from the Baptists. U.S. Secretary of Education Roderick Paige recently told the Baptist Press that "All things equal, I would prefer to have a child in a school that has a strong appreciation for the values of the Christian community, where a child is taught to have a strong faith." This guy is in charge of education in this country. I don't make this stuff up, you know. Dan Legan, Paige's stooge (uh, I mean "press secretary"), only confused things further by saying "He [Paige] has dedicated his entire career to promoting diversity and making sure children from all races, ethnic groups and faiths share access to the best possible education," which directly contradicted Paige's own earlier statements: "The reason that Christian schools and Christian universities are growing is a result of a strong value system. In a religious environment the value system is set. That's not the case in a public school where there are so many different kids with different kinds of values." Because, as we all know, teaching children about diversity and alternative viewpoints is a bad thing. Raise them to be closed-minded, that will assist them greatly in their adult life. This is the best part. To all who disagree with his views of religion in schools, Paige says "I would offer critics my prayers." Yet after all of this, Paige now insists that his comments were "taken out of context" (boy they love saying that, don't they?), and that he wholeheartedy supports the separation of church and state. Nothing conclusive, but I get pretty bad vibes from this guy....almost as bad as Tom DeLay. |
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| Yeah, I Thought He Was Dead, Too (5/31/03) |
| Finally, after a really long time, Eric Rudolph has been captured. Rejoice, brothers and sisters, for the right-wing Christian extremists have just lost another folk hero. It turns out that Rudolph, who is an experienced survivalist, has been living in the woods since around mid-1998. He was found rooting around in a dumpster behind a supermarket by an officer on routine patrol somewhere in North Carolina. Rudolph tried to run, but didn't resist when he was captured and was quite polite. He said his name was Jerry Wilson, but he confessed that he was Eric Robert Rudolph when one of the officers recognized him. Rudolph had been on the FBIs 10 Most Wanted List for years following his alleged bombing of the Olympics, as well as a gay nightclub, office building, and a Birmingham abortion clinic all between 1996-1998. John Ashcroft made a statement after the capture, saying Rudolph "will face American justice", and a lot of other chest-beating bullshit. In reality, Ashcroft probably worships this guy. Here's hoping he doesn't get the death penalty: I'd rather see him languish in prison than become a martyr. |
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| Time For the "Get Over It" Awards (8/27/03) |
| Roy Moore was finally put in his place recently: By defying a federal court order to remove his controversial "Ten Commandments" monument in his Montgomery, AL courthouse, he has recently been suspended. Good riddance. Of course, as soon as the fundies heard that the monument was to be removed they came out of the woodwork to come down and protest. And just moments ago the monument was removed, while all the fundies did....well, nothing, apart from scream a lot and throw fits and talk about religous oppresion, as if the loss of this government endorsement of their religion somehow keeps them from exercising their own beliefs. I guess they're just angry that they can't covert people. Something like that. I'll be damned if I'll ever understand their type. Fox News (yeah, I watch it for a laugh) was showing and interviewing the protesters, which are by far the most retarded people I've ever had the silly pleasure of listening to. And before any of you write up and complain about my use of the word "retarded", keep in mind that I've never courted Politcal Correctness. I'm too busy hanging out with her sister, Controversy. "PUT IT BACK!" some redneck fruitcake was screaming at the top of his lungs. The camera lingered on him for a disturbing amount of time. "GET YOUR HANDS OFF OUR GOD! PUT IT BACK! PUT IT BACK! GET YOUR GOD-HATIN' HANDS OFF!", etc. I guess this loon thinks his annoying screams and temper tantrums will somehow change the fact that the monument is a blatant violation of Church/State Separation. Still another woman had driven down from Missouri. Or Indiana. Or Ohio. To be honest, I can't really remember. She was interviewed for a long time, and made the statement: "These Commandments are part of the Judeo-Christian ethic, which this country was obviously founded on." Obviously? It's not so obvious to me. Would somebody please tell me: If this country was founded upon the morality of the Ten Commandments, why are only two of them laws? If fact, some of them contradict the values of our country. "Thou shalt have no strange gods before me" contradicts the First Amendment (which promises freedom of religion), and a pretty good chunk of our economy is based on coveting our neighbors goods. And I guess this woman has never heard of the Treaty of Tripoli, either (see my articles). The main organizer of this tripe, Patrick Mahoney (leader of the "Christian Defense Coalition" - sounds nice and nonviolent, doesn't it?) has said that this is "government tyranny" and "an attack on religous freedom". Because obviously the separation between church and state doesn't protect religous freedom. So that, ladies and gentlemen, is our problem. Ignorance. The ignorant are flocking to Alabama right now like Muslims to Mecca, so that they can all pray and bombast the blasphemous. Now would be a great time to drive down there and point and laugh at them. |
| First, it was low calorie diets. Then low-fat. Then low-carbohydrate. Now get a load of the newest dietary fad...low-logic diets. Yeah, I know, all temporary diets are low in logic, but you haven't seen anything until you've seen...Christian Dieting. Diets based off of eating biblical food. Unfortunately, I haven't seen any yet that encourage eating bread baked with dung, but I'm still waiting. There are currently several of these programs out there. I'll start with www.christianweightloss.homestead.com, for no particular reason other than it's typical of the programs out there. "Dear Friend, Are you struggling with weight loss and diets? Do you feel frustrated and confused by all the information (or misinformation) out there about losing weight? Do you sometimes wonder why, as a Christian, you're not gaining victory in the area of weight loss or eating? You've come to the right web site: Christian Weight Loss!" Gee, that sounds peachy-keen. Tell me more. "As a weight loss coach and someone who has struggled with weight myself, I have found that Christians face unique issues with weight loss and diets. However I also believe that Christians have a unique opportunity for victory because of the power that is given to us as children of God and joint heirs with Christ. Unfortunately most of what's out there today isn't really giving us accurate information." How exactly do Christians face unique issues in weight loss? Just as most people in this country are Christians, so are most dieters. I should probably let you know this is a 22-step program (yes, you read that correctly), and you have to buy it. Yeah. Making money off of fad dieting and spiritual ignorance? Life must be good for someone. Another diet of this caliber (a considerably more popular one, I might add), is "The Hallelujah Diet", started by the Reverend George Malkmus. Here's a bit of info on it, from www.yourlifesource.com/hallelujah-diet.htm. "The Hallelujah Diet is being used by hundreds and thousands of people around the world to accomplish what our present day medical system cannot." Yep, it's being used successfully by hundreds and thousands. And that mean old medical community is just conveniently ignoring, I guess. "In fact the Hallelujah Diet has been so successful that is was recently adopted by the successful Oasis of Hope hospital." The what? "The nutritional and health information that follows is based on the teachings of God's Holy Word -- the Bible, as well as personal experiences and research. We do not offer medical advice or prescribe the use of diet as a form of treatment for sickness without the approval of a health professional." Well, so much for "faith over science" then, huh? Apparently what it comes down to is the good Reverend eats a bunch of fruit and vegetables for all three meals, and some crap called "BarleyLife". I don't even want to know. Oh yeah, and avoid all dairy and meat, because they cause 90% of the body's problems. No source is given on this, nor was I ever aware that people in biblical times were vegans, but whatever. Oh...and one other interesting note on the Hallelujah diet: You have to take vitamin B-12 supplements with it, because the diet is lacking in it. Says the Reverend: "This shocked me, that God's perfect eating plan could have a flaw...But we realized that fruits and vegetables back then were more nutritious because of the topsoil." Great excuse there, George. Apparently there was some sort of magical topsoil back then that just doesn't exist anymore. And he never says, but I wonder did he get this plan from God himself? I wouldn't doubt he'd say it if asked. There are tons of these plans out there. Search out some of them, they're an excellent source for humor. |
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| A What Kind of Diet? (6/18/04) |