Title: The Meaning of a Gift
Author: Katie
Timeline: Post Seeing Red, middle of “OMWF” and “Tabula Rasa”
Summary: Tara’s Pov on the happenings on “Tabula Rasa” and her thoughts of what Willow really means to her. Ending is AU.
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You never really stop and think what that person really means to you until they are gone, not so much gone, but lost to you.
I loved her, that I did.
Nevertheless, why should I stay after what she had done?
I have the right to turn away from this relationship; she abused my mind, played with it, as it was her own toy.
Do I still love her? With my life.
I had told her times before about the danger that magic may bring.
She had assured me that it wouldn’t ever get to her.
I believed her, I always believed in her.
She was my girl, in a way she still is.
The days we spend together were heaven, like walking on clouds.
I could stare at her forever, her eyes, her lips, red hair I could run my hands through, she was exotically perfect.
I want to be with her…..what’s stopping me?
It’s simple…..Me.
Why can’t I just turn away from the events that took place?
Can’t I forgive and forget….again?
I need her, crave her.
A smile always forms on my lips when I think of the day where I sang to her.
She was mesmerized. I loved every minute of it, of her.
I never met anyone like Willow, nobody can ever compare anyhow.
Even if I were to perish soon I would still love her.
Life is so short to play these games of to stay or to not.
I can’t live my life knowing I turned away from her.
Reminiscing about the day we met is occurs quite frequently.
A demon, that’s what brought us together, but even before that I felt her.
Felt the energy, her passion.
The way she’d smile sitting there talking about whatever, the curve her mouth made when she laughed.
I have never felt such strong emotions with anyone before.
It takes over you completely.
God, I love her.
I remember one night we were sleeping so soundly and Willow snuggled closer to me and whispered half asleep………
“Can I keep you?”…….
From then on, I knew she was my girl forever, do I even have to say what my answer was? I think not.
She gives me something to think about, dream about, sing about.
Saving me times and times before.
My everything…that’s what she is.
Nothing has been as beautiful as her, not even heaven’s skies.
There’s not even a minute that goes of every hour of the day I don’t feel her near me. I know I need her back here with me.
Sometimes I think she just cause me sweet misery.
Isn’t all great love like that?
Cannot have it without the pain.
Sometimes I think Willow might not know I am by her side always.
I feel as if I have to shout for her to open her eyes; I’ll always be by her side, how could she be so blind?
Should I just end it all……but our love is the fire that keeps me going inside.
I would give up everything for her, only her.
Why are we afraid to be in love?
I can feel her holding me so tightly now.
I can’t explain it, I know it’s tough to be in love.
When Willow’s near I feel whole, all that’s there now is emptiness.
I don’t want to be hollow.
There’s no better feeling in the world than feeling her, having her.
I always felt as I was locked up, but I was set free.
She leaves me completely breathless.
Where there’s a Will, there’s a way.
She gave me her wings to fly, her eyes to see, she gave herself fully.
Sometimes words just can’t explain.
You’re in my heart.
The only light that shines here in the dark.
When I was alone you came around, pulled me through times when
I was down.
There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do for you.
I was weak and you were strong.
I love you, I want you, damn the problems we will get through it.
Togther, always together.
I’m gonna go find her and claim her mine.
I never want to be apart, our love is more than that.
We share a gift.
I know what it all means now.
Willow is my gift, always has been, just couldn’t see it until now.
I never had much but I was finally given something, someone.
How could I ever turn away?
I couldn’t.
My gift from god, is Willow.
How could I not see such a thing? Was I that blind?
Doesn’t matter, I have her.
What she did is that past, its over.
Somehow, I know, she’ll never do it again.
I’ll help her.
Why?
Because she my girl, my one and only, a rose, my willow tree.
My Gift.