On Finding SoulmatesI read the September to November MS Liaison Bulletin. One article inside (Single With MS) left me with much to think about. Nicolas Dahan's article is about the difficulties those of us with MS can find when trying to find that special someone. Some people, when faced with the idea of being involved with a person with an illness get freaked out, decide the best way to cope is not to be with that person. The article further suggests finding someone else who has MS, that such a partner would be more open to being with someone else who is facing the same sort of tribulations as you are. On the one hand, this is a good suggestion. It tells you that you shouldn't discount someone for the same reasons you worry that others ignore you. On the other hand... Should people pass you by because you have MS, or some other illness, when they don't? Many have in the past, many still do - but if they do, then they just weren't worth the effort. I'll use my case, as I'm the person I know best: I'm a talented writer, a lover of Jazz music, a man with a heart so full of love that there's plenty for my cats, my nephew, my nieces... and there's still a lot to spare. I'm well read, have many areas of interest, and I've been told by others a great person. If a lady saw me, got to know me, then balked because I walk with a cane in each hand for balance... well, if a few pieces of metal are enough to scare her away, good riddance. A true soulmate will look to the person inside, not the accessories. If they can't, they were wrong to begin with. Our soulmates are out there - disabled or not - we just have to keep hoping. © November 15th, 1999 |