Oh, man! I forgot to tell you about the Christmas Zit! That was pretty fabulous. See, the day before Christmas I drove out to the desert to visit my folks, the plan being that we'd all open our presents on Christmas Eve, and then on Christmas morning we'd drive up to the mountains to have our big family get-together with all of my aunts and uncles and cousins and everybody. Well, Christmas Eve was lovely, we opened our presents and got soppy and it was all very Hallmark, and then on Christmas morning I awoke with... The Christmas Zit. Oh Jesus, this thing was like a big jelly donut growing out of my face. Now, normally I would have had some cosmetics with me for an emergency like this, but of course I'd left every little bit of makeup at home. I couldn't ask to borrow any of my mom's makeup (I'm a closet case, remember,) so I locked the bathroom door and went through every inch of the cupboards, looking for some foundation. There wasn't any. OK, I figured, maybe Mom keeps her makeup in her purse. So I waited until my folks were both off getting ready, then I scampered out to Mom's purse in the living room and did a hasty but thorough search. Nothing! I just couldn't believe it; how does an adult woman get through the day without makeup?

I quickly hatched a plan; I'd drive up to the mountains in my own car, and on the way I'd stop off at a 7-11 or something and buy some makeup. (This was assuming, of course, that there were any 7-11's open on Christmas morning.) My folks nixed that plan by insisting - insisting - that we all ride up together in their car. I don't see my folks that often, and normally I would have been delighted to spend the time with them, but in this case all I could think was finding some way to sneak off and cover this zit. I know it sounds nutty and obsessive, but believe me, this was one monster zit. Well, we made the trip up to the mountains, and as soon as we got to my aunt's cabin I ran for the bathroom and started digging through the cupboards. My aunt's a big cosmetics queen, so I was sure there'd be some foundation somewhere. There wasn't. So, I spent the whole day trying to keep the left side of my face hidden away from everybody. I was crouching behind plants, and holding up my wineglass in front of my face; it was like that Austin Powers bit where he keeps hiding his willie behind shrubbery and stuff. Finally, right before I was about to leave, I visited the bathroom one more time and discovered a little cache of makeup in the cupboard. I tell you, I nearly wept for joy. A few deft swipes of concealer, and my zit was almost completely obscured. When I came out of the bathroom, everyone must have been really puzzled; "Hey, where'd that zit go?"

I've been thinking lately about how many of the big celebrations in my life have turned into utter disasters. There was my birthday last week, which I spent sick with the flu. There was the Christmas Eve a few years ago, when a drunk crashed into my (parked) car and totalled it. Even my high school graduation was a big bust; my parents couldn't find me in the crowd after the ceremony, so they assumed I'd already left with friends and they took off without me. I ended up all alone on the track field, sixty miles from home and with about forty-five cents in my pocket. I could on go and on, but the point is that if there's some special occasion I'm really looking forward to, there's a very good chance I'll spend it picking shards of glass out of my wounds. 

Damn it, this is turning into another whiny entry, and I told myself I wasn't going to let that happen. What can I say? Things have been shitty lately. I'm still sick, I hate (hate!) my job, and K's been so busy at work lately that she's been getting home around 10 p.m. every night. To top it all off, Buffy's been in reruns for like three months. Fuck!

This already feels like one of the longest years of my life.