I watch the images swirl before my eyes,

Incomprehensible, at the same time making perfect sense.

I saw the soil red with blood

at Triblinka and at Auswitz

I heard the screams as a blinding light exploded

over Hiroshima and Nagaski

I smelt the burning flesh as the Inquisitors of the catholic church

gayly went about their job

I saw christ die but three days later never saw him rise

I've seen dark demons emerge from hell's gates

but never have I seen god's angels

work good apoun this ravished earth

Many have asked me why I am so dark

and truthfully I must answer

Because I am only human

You try to pity me for having a black soul

Pity is for the weak and weak I am not

I do as I please and think for myself

To you my views are sick, the product of a deranged mind

Survival of the fitest let the weak fall to the wayside

Those who drown in mediocrity should be judged on their own actions

No excuses

But you look at me as if I were a demon

Well evil you name me so evil I am

And so be it

If evil, to you, is having an open mind and living as I choose

Not blindly following

but always questioning the accepted truths.

You see me walk

you shiver in fright

not realizing that

what you see is only a mask

inside is emptyness and open wounds

pain I have never allowed to heal

cold hearted and heartless

I have been called

but you don't realize

the depths of pain

I hide inside

afraid to let it heal

to just let it go

afraid because it has sculpture me

into the being that I am

living with the knowledge

that I will push away

those who try to care about me

but fearing that if I don't

I will be ripped apart once again

Standing inside myself

looking at the world around me.

trying to grasp the thoughts going around my head

chaotic thought patterns, swirling mass of coherency

or is it dementia? Am I truely deranged?

Inside I sit watching the looks given by the guardians of the status quo

Another thought goes swirling by,

suddenly I am engulfed in the contemplation of morality vs. humanity

it passes and again resumes the swirling.

There comes a time when all must be renewed

When all must be questioned and justified

such a time I once again face

as the memories of the past flash thru my brain

as my beliefs and grand thoughts strip away

till all that is left is my innermost self

when once again I must analyze my thoughts

are they still valid do I still believe

once again I face my most painful memories

have I learned anything is it time to move on

once again I face the most painful time in this thing I call life

once again I must question myself

for this is my core belief

painful it is but also quite necissary

for it helps me ensure that I remain true to myself