CHAPTER 14: THE GREAT MEATBALL WAR OF '74

Burke hit the road and began heading to PI's where he could check in on events and avoid the turmoil at the house. It was quite dark out on the road alone. Dark and damp. If it had not been for the full moon he would not have been able to see much of anything. The nearest man-mad light shone miles off. He looked up and the moon as he walked, and thought about TJ. Burke wondered of TJ was howling at the moon right now, or if he was even alive. No, he mustn't allow that thought. TJ would be fine. He could take care of himself. No matter what kind of a mess TJ had gotten into, he always seemed to do all right.

Burke moved along for a quite a while as quickly as he possibly could, a shade slower than a lazy jog, when he saw the road light up from behind. A car was approaching. He had hoped that he would not make contact with the limo again. He wasn't ready for anymore emotional battle of the heart. Burke turned to determine if it was William and Sunni but the vehicle seemed too small to be the limo. It was a Volkswagen.

The car pulled along side of Burke and the passenger window came down. Burke looked inside at the driver. It was the Christian Girl, the one that wanted to pray with him on the porch for TJ.

"Need a ride into town?" She asked.

"Sure. Ah thanks. Thanks a lot." Burke got in. He a tried to move past the first moment of silence that one encounters when hitch-hiking. "So-said any good prayers lately?"

"Excuse me?"

"You remember me don't you? You wanted to pray on my porch for TJ earlier today" Burke explained.

"I'm afraid you've got me confused with someone. I haven't been in town in quite a while and I don't know anyone named TJ."

"You're saying that you weren't on my porch this afternoon?"

"Like I said I've been away for a while."

Burke tried to verify that she was the same person. He was sure. He still saw the peacefulness in her eyes. There was something else. Her earring, at least on the right side, was a cross. This had to be the same person. Why did she deny it? "I must have confused you with someone" he said. Burke thought it best not to push the issue.

"They say that everyone has a 'double' running around on earth, maybe you met mine" the driver said without looking at Burke.

"So you haven't been to town today eh? The whole place is looking for a friend of mine 'TJ'." TJ wandered off into the Shawnee National Forrest yesterday in an effort to detox from alcohol and drugs."

"You're kidding. That's suicidal."

"Yeah. He wasn't in his right mind when he did it. Everyone's hoping that he's OK" Burke said soberly.

"What does your friend look like? I'll keep an eye open for him too."

"Well he's very hairy for one thing..."

The driver did not let Burke finish. "Hairy? Funny you should say that. I went through Shawnee on my way in and I saw the hairiest guy I ever saw in my life walking-rather limping down the road. I was afraid to pick him up though. He kind of looked like the missing link, no offense, if you know what I mean. He looked kind of scary to me so I kept on going. Normally I pick up hitch..."

It was Burke who interrupted now. "Where was he at? Which roads?"

"I don't know. You know nothings marked out there. There aren't many signposts. I know the way by memory."

"Can you go back there?" Burke had a pleading edge to his voice.

"Well yes I probably could but I'm not headed that way now. I'm going back to town-remember?"

"Oh yes of course. I suppose it would be asking too much of a stranger to take me back to that spot. How far back was it?"

"Well lets see. That was about half an hour, no, about forty-forty five minutes ago. I've been mostly doing 45 to 50 miles per hour. Are you good at math?" Burke tried to do the calculation but it was more computation than his mind was ready for at the moment. I felt that it was more than twenty miles though. Too much ground to cover on foot. He began a plan. Get the Piscataway. Road trip. Victory party. No booze for TJ. It was all coming together.

"Hey I appreciate the info. I'll round up some friends and we'll go back. Can you try to relate the way back?" The woman back tracked her journey to the best of her recollection. That discussion took them into town; to PI's. Burke thanked the girl for her help.

"Good luck finding your friend" she said with a smile.

"Yeah I've got to get him back to the zoo. The other primates sure miss him!" The girl laughed. It sounded musical. "You're sure that you weren't at my house today eh?" he asked one last time.

She smiled and waved bye as she pulled off.

Burke entered PI's exploding with enthusiasm but it didn't last long once he met up with Norber. "Where in creation have you been?" the manager demanded. "It's a long story and I've got lots to do" Burke said. "I've got to organize; to..." His sentence was cut short by Norber who seemed very upset. "You stroll in hours late, no excuse and now you've got to get going?"

"Yeah, why what's the problem? What's your problem Norber?" Burke asked. Norber explained that Burke was supposed to work; that it was an unusually hectic night, probably because of all the search activity for TJ. Burke had left them short handed in a battle zone of sauce and flying meatballs. "Just look at this shirt!" Norber said as he turned to show him the back of his shirt. Sure enough there were several circular splat stains on his back; the unfortunate result of a meatball attack from the rear. "I am going to talk to Mike about this in the morning. Until I hear from him, you can forget about showing up for work here."

Just like that, Burke was a civilian again. All his good intentions and efforts unrecognized. It didn't matter right now though. Burke was still working out getting TJ help. That was more important than oaring sauce or deflecting meatballs with pot lids for Norber.

"Maybe you think it's no big deal to miss work, but you weren't even around to bail you buddy out of jail" Norber said.

"Who, when?" Burke said in amazement.

"Jak had used his phone call to call here after no one answered at the house hoping to find you, or at least someone to bail him out. I was too busy due to the manpower shortage that you had created, and apparently everyone else was still looking for TJ." Norber reached into his pocket and pulled out a crumpled ball of money. He untangled a hundred dollar bill and handed it to Burke. "Go get your friend" he said.

"What are the Charges?" Burke asked Norber.

"Trumped up. They had a detective sitting in a car photographing guys urinating behind the house-something to do with that he said."

"I'll bet they hang the pictures in their lockers."

Burke walked over to the Police Station a few blocks away and paid Jak's bail. "Sign here" the Desk Sgt. Said. He looked at the signature, then grabbed the release form and walked over to a man standing by the water cooler. The two apparently began discussing Burke because they never took their eyes off him while they talked. Then he brought Jak out of the cell and led him over to Burke. "You better watch yourself" the man said to Burke.

They returned to the house in silence. The party was gone. "Nothing like a bust to break up a party" Burke said. "Oh yeah."

"That's about the only thing that could have done it" Jak returned. "They were bar-b-q'ing on the front lawn."

"Yeah I know."

Burke began to head up to his room when General Marchbank called them from the couch. "Hey guys, TJ's story is on the news" he said.

They sat on the floor in front of the set. The reporter was telling the story of the man who had disappeared, and the strange effect it was having on the town. The photo behind him was a still life cut from the lake footage taken day they went rafting. He said that a formal search would begin in the morning. A reporter on the street was interviewing people combing the area looking for TJ. His two interviewees were Ward and Orbit.

"Oh Man they're making a circus out of this whole event!" Burke exclaimed. "Nobody gives a shit about what's really happening here."

"Hey man, you gave up. I kept looking" Jak said.

An uneasy silence took hold of the room.

The news anchor said "This just in....this may be a related story. A man was found washed up on shore of Cat Tail Lake a short while ago. He has not been identified. As soon as we have more details we'll keep you updated."

"You don't think it could be..." Jak began speculating, but Burke cut into his thought. "Don't you even finish that sentence" he said.

Marchbank tried to steer the topic away from any horrific conclusion that Jak was building in his imagination. "I'll bet they use Cameron Kilgor on this story" He said. "You can just tell that he believes the next story will win him the Pulitzer."

"You mean 'Camera-on,'" Burke said in a smart ass tone.

"Haven't you had enough making fun of peoples names?" Jak asked. "I just spent the evening in jail because of your 'limp-dick' comment. That guy is gonna get you one of these days."

"His first name isn't Richard is it? Hello--Dick... Dick Limp-Dick--Glad to meet you! Common Jak stop being so sensitive. And as for Kilgor, you know that that's a made-up name. The Camera is on the killing and gore. That is what makes news sell and Mr. Cheap toupee is in the middle of it all with a smile and a wink that says 'Gee I think I'm just swell!"

"You know the funny thing about Kilgor?" Marchbank asked. "He's not even bald!"

"No--go on-your kidding right?"

"Nope, saw him down on the set when I was trying to get Dover to visit Mostly-Bob. Kilgor was doing a story down there too, and was really hot that day. As soon as the cameras stopped rolling he yanked that thing off of his head and exclaimed "Whew! Couldn't wait to get rid of that road kill!"

Burke began laughing, for the first time that day it seemed. "Why does he wear it then?"

"His real hair is red... he looks like Howdy-Doody! His skull comes to a point on top!"

Burke was laughing heartily now. That guy--he's the establishment, man, if I ever saw it.

The news reporter was interrupted in the middle of his narrative. "We reported a grim story a few minutes ago about a man that had been found on the shore of Cat Tail Lake. Cameron Kilgor is down there. We take you now to Cat Tail lake."

The view switched to Kilgor in his crappy raincoat at the lake. Behind him in dramatic soft focus blinked countless red and yellow emergency vehicle lights.

"Look," Burke said. "he's got his hair on straight."

"Shhhh" Marchbank chided. "I'm trying to hear this."

"Well Chuck I arrived just a short while ago and as you can see there's lots activity going on behind me. I've talked to a few people here and nobody has been able to identify the man found along the shore this evening. "

"Cameron, have you seen the man, could this be the man that everyone in town seems to be looking for?"

"Well Chuck I have not been able to get that close. All they are saying at this point is that they will give us details as they learn them. There is some speculation here as to the man's identity. You may recall that we did a piece on swimming at Devil's Tongue yesterday. The same man that everyone is trying to find is the very same one who fell into the lake yesterday. Indeed Chuck, if it is the same man he would have discovered that this isn't such a funny joke after all. This is Cameron Kilgor reporting for Channel 8 news. Back to you Chuck."

Jak walked off apparently more depressed than before, while Burke and Marchbank sat in silence. Silence. The person who is at peace within the silence is in charge. Marchbank spoke. I heard about the limo and Sunni he said. You were the envy of every guy at the house tonight, do you know that?

"Didn't even occur to me."

"There were guys that would have gone through finals a second time to be where you where-so how did it go?"

"OK."

"Well aren't you gonna tell me? Did ya noodle her?"

"NO! I didn't noodle her."

"Did ol' Mr. Wiggly Worm come out and do his dance?"

"Man you are sick!"

"Hey I'm just trying to lighten up a heavy situation here. Have you noticed just how damn serious this place has become with Mostly-Bob and TJ not around? We've got to get them back. This sobriety is killing us all."

Burke agreed as he climbed the stairs to enter the sanctuary of his room. Once again took out his guitar and put it on its stand. He sat down and began to evaluate current events.

He had gotten fired from his job.

He friendship with Sunni was probably over.

Jak was upset with him.

Mostly-Bob was in the hospital recovering from a five gallon bucket of whupass.

One of his best friends was missing and possibly dead.

A detective had a personal vendetta against him.

He had missed dinner.

It had not been one of his best days. Burke walked over to his dresser. There in the bottom drawer way in the back was his treasure box. Ever since he was a little kid he had a treasure box; at first filled with baseball cards and bottle caps. Later his treasures increased in sentimental value. His treasure box was a secret that he shared with no one.

As he looked through the things that had meaning in his life. He figured out what he had to do..

_________________________________

Burke boarded the City of New Orleans, this time heading toward Chicago. Although the railway station was part of the heart of his turf, today it seemed different from normal. Different from when he first arrived. Today it was a point of departure.

He was pleased when the car started rolling. He watched the surroundings depart with mixed emotions though. He was glad to be moving in a direction away from the surrealistic circus that the town had become to his intellect; although sad to be parting from the spiritual cathedral that the Forrest had become to his heart.

The ride was uneventful. Just long and tiresome. He watched the farmlands slowly transform into suburbia.

The city of New Orleans was now riding the viaducts toward the city. Burke gazed out at the surrounding neighborhoods. The one he was passing right now had five men at different homes all pushing lawnmowers in a suburban ritual. The guy closest to him had a safari helmet on, with shorts and knee socks exposing a one inch strip of bare leg. It occurred to Burke that Wakefield was a place that had relatively normal people living under the pretense that they were weird, and the suburbs had weird people living under the pretense that they were normal.