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Wendy News
May 25, 1999
Issue #8
"Pure writing from a pure place."
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CONTAINED HEREIN:
o Jobs and Car Accidents
o Who Won That Hat
o Reviews
o Letters!
o Really Official Credits
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Jobs and Car Accidents
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What is it with me today? First my yogurt explodes on me. Then my soda explodes
on me. Then my honey mustard sauce explodes on me. I'm going to start opening
everything I am going to consume in its own vacuum-safe area, far away from my
nice green shirt I got for Christmas that I am now going to have to have
dry-cleaned, along with the twelve other items I have to be dry-cleaned. Sigh. I
can't afford to look spiffy.
On the up side, jobs seem to be swirling in the air -- two web jobs, both doing
some sort of writing/editorial/coding and such stuff, one in Florida and one in
California. Both states have their pros and cons, so I'm just going to see how it
goes.
Of course, the people here at the Law Department would still like to see me stay,
but I dunno. It's nice and peaceful for now, but obviously not what I really want
to do. But I am getting some writing done. And tons of filing. Heh-heh.
I had an okay 27th birthday (May 19), although rather quiet and strange, because
all day I was surrounded by people who didn't have a clue that it was my
birthday. I'm temping here, so I didn't see how I could just announce, "Hey
everybody! You don't really know me all that well and I'm probably not staying,
but today's my birthday! Where's my cake?" Mark ended up taking me out to dinner
and we ate a huge steak dinner after which we really couldn't move and sort of
beached ourselves miserably on his floor. I also drank a margarita that ended up
making me sick. Mark gave me a book. I can only assume it's a good book, because
he said it's his favorite book and I will understand him even better if I read
it. I love that boy to death. But you know, a book. That will make me understand
him. Not that I'm complaining. Heh-heh.
I had to renew the tags on my car, which I thought was funny -- on my birthday,
the government wants money from me. Then I got into a car accident a couple of
days after my birthday. No one was hurt or even hit, but it was an accident.
Allow me to explain: I was heading out of my apartment complex, making that nasty
left I have to make every day, when I started pulling out without seeing the
black Cadillac zooming straight for me. I wasn't paying attention, obviously, but
Mark saw it and made me see it before I could get further. I stopped, but that
Cadillac was speeding straight towards the driver's side door of my car, with me
right there behind it.
Crafty driving saved me from being smooshed -- the car swerved and jumped onto the
median and into the opposing lanes of traffic. Luckily there were no cars coming
at that time, so he was able to just stop and back up (otherwise that crafty
driving would've saved me, but not him and his passengers). His car was leaking
something and his wife got out with a little boy attached to her hip. I saw that
little boy and thought good God. Then a little girl emerged from the car. Dad was
already on the cellphone. I felt like the biggest idiot in the entire world. Mark
walked into the street to check them (and the expensive car) out and see how they
were. I sat paralyzed in my car, afraid to talk to these people. What if they
were angry and litigious? They sure had a right to be angry.
We all moved our cars to a more convenient location and waited for the police to
show up. I think Mom was kind of peeved, and Dad didn't say much either, but the
kids just stared and stared at Mark and I. Of course, that's what four and
five-year-olds do. Which is part of the reason I like (and dislike) kids -- they
have absolutely no shame. The cop showed up and took the report, and then a tow
truck was called for the Cadillac (we all agreed it didn't look too damaged, but
no one knew where that leaking clear fluid was coming from). The whole thing took
about an hour and a half. While we were waiting for the tow truck, I offered the
family something to drink, since I lived right there. Mom and Dad didn't seem
interested, but the two little ones did. As soon as I mentioned I had green
Gatorade I could tell I had hit the spot.
Mom and kids walked with Mark and I to my apartment while I found out more about
them. Both kids had just graduated from school (K-4 and kindergarten), the same
school where Mom also teaches. They were on their way to the movies -- the same
theater Mark and I were going to later. Upstairs, the girl clung to her mother
since she was scared of cats (and Grover was looking awfully fierce splayed out
on the couch like that) while the boy (the older of the two) wandered around,
checking the place out and petting Grovey. He had two glasses of Gatorade. I told
them to pardon the mess, that we were in the process of moving (as if it's not
always a mess). The little boy stood next to the litter box and pointed at it,
asking me, "Are those nuts?" I leaned over and said, "No, those are kitty
poopies." "Eeeeew," he said, taking another slurp of Gatorade. "I told you this
place was a mess," I laughed. It was the first time I had even cracked a smile.
When everyone was done with their Gatorade we headed back downstairs, where the
tow truck was just showing up. We apologized again (like Mark had anything to be
sorry for, but he did too) and Mark drove us off. It didn't hit me for another
hour or so that I could have killed that family. That nice family with the two
really cute, well-behaved kids who had just graduated from school could be dead
right now and it would be my fault completely. I wasn't paying attention. I was
in a hurry and impatient and I pulled out without looking carefully enough. I got
lucky. We all got lucky. But luck isn't always there, as we all know when we
watch that dreadful six o'clock news at night.
I am being much more careful when I drive now, and I reprimand myself if I forget
even for a second how dangerous driving is. I have the tendency to get all
carefree and zoomy and don't want to think that another car could come smashing
into mine, or vice versa, if I'm not completely aware of my surroundings. All I
can hope for is that the lesson was learned by me, and that I won't have to rely
on luck to keep other people or me from harm in the future. Of course, it also
confirms my belief that Florida is one of the crappiest, most confusing and badly
designed places to drive in America, and that I won't be spending the rest of my
life here. But I digress.
Be careful out there.
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Who Won That Hat
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I got so many letters of nicety and love from this contest. Sigh. And more people
were checking out my website than I thought (meaning, someone other than my
immediate family and friends). Oh, and the correct answer was Grover Bean and
Milo Edward -- the names of my cats. Which you all knew anyway. So without further
ado, I present to you the winner of that Mickey Mouse baseball cap:
magnet@acadia.net
Thanks for all your support! More cool contests to come!
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Reviews
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HEALTH VALLEY ZESTY BLACK BEAN WITH RICE SOUP
I decided to go a slightly healthier in my eating habits, since I had regressed
to eating fried chicken, hamburgers and fries on a daily basis, and washing it
all down with two or three Mountain Dews a day. And I wonder why my health
deteriorates. I found this dry soup number in the same place you can get those
awful-yet-tempting Cup O'Noodles none of us wants to admit to having eaten. I
figured, hey, it's only a dollar something, I'll bargain. What I didn't notice
until I added that hot water and let it stew for ten minutes was that this soup
had cilantro, the cat nip of Wendy. So not only was the black bean and rice part
delicious, but little bits of cilantro jumped up the excitement. Omigod it was so
filling, too. Those small paper cups don't look like they'd fill you up, but it's
way more filling than, say, a Stouffer's frozen entrŽe. Oh, and p.s. This
particular soup is 100% fat free! For those of you who care about that kind of
thing.
Rating: Yum Yum!
FANTASTIC COUSCOUS WITH LENTILS SOUP
I bought this the same day and was less eager to try it, since the word lentils
makes my mouth dry. But I love couscous, and it had all this iron and other good
stuff in it. This, I was surprised to find, was even more delicious than the
black bean soup (which needed a little salt, really). And it was even more
filling. Spicy, but not too spicy, and really thick and hearty, this soup gets my
Favorite Soup of the Year award. At least until I try all the other soup flavors
that were on the grocery shelf.
Rating: Even more Yum Yum!
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Letters!
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Wendy,
I became hooked on your newsletters when you were in NYC, and I have been having
withdrawals, even fearing that all is lost, until #6 and then bam #7. I am glad
to have you back, you bring a little enjoyment to my work/cube world. Please, oh
god please, keep the newsletters coming, let's just limit the mushy boy stuff,
enough said. Glad you're back, happy and your soul is on the mend.
tom "I wish I had windows in my cube" finn
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Dear Wendy,
I no longer remember how I got to your website (I was looking up some info on the
beverage "Orbitz" cuz I saw it in my grocery store), but I've spent the last hour
reading everything you wrote. What a delight. I loved the comics, especially
Virgin Wool. But the newsletters are outstanding. Apparently there was more
before Newsletter #1, so I feel like I've walked into a party already in full
swing, but don't know anybody. Still, I enjoyed reading your harrowing
experiences at your various jobs, the road trip with Grover and Milo, and the Kid
Quotes from Disney World. Even though I first felt like I'd walked into that
party in full swing, by the time I got through reading the newsletters, I felt
like I belonged. Thanks for the great read, and good luck to you and Mark. Oh,
one other thing: While I respect your right to choose whatever candy you wish,
nothing -- and I'm dead serious when I say NOTHING -- beats a Reese's Peanut
Butter Cup. Please don't argue. Take care!
Paul
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Really Official Credits!
Editor, Writer, "Old Reliable": Wendy Hall
To write to Wendy, send her an e-mail at: hall_wendy@hotmail.com
To visit Wendy's website, go to: http://www.oocities.org/soho/studios/1232 --
it's long, but reliable. Bookmark it, wouldja?
"Wendy News" is a Girl Planet Production. Copyright 1999, All Rights Reserved.
Any stealing, cheating, backstabbing, duplication or otherwise funky bad behavior
without permission from Wendy Hall will result in Girl Planet Productions giving
a ringy-dingy to our Super Lawyers. You don't want that.
Aw, c'mon.
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