A Thanks

I had the most wonderful walk today, many thoughts and feelings touched me gently. The snow is melting as the temperature continues to rise, the sky is crystal clear, clean and bright. I am sure my face is sunburned around my sunglasses as my cheeks are warm. It has been a long harsh winter this year. At times so cold the air froze into something we call "ice fog", where stillness prevails and few signs of wildlife appear with the exception of a few coyotes walking across the tundra in search of something. Each leaving only footprints in the snow which quickly become covered as the northern winds rise up and begin once again. I have been coming here for only a short while, perhaps to avoid the cold. It crossed my mind that perhaps I too have been searching for something while here. I am extremely grateful to experience this place, smell its sweetness, share its thoughts and incorporate its wisdom so that I might once again nourish and develop my personal footprints. Again, I do not think this unique to me....only that I need this at this point in my life.

Recently I seem to have mellowed some and dare I say, perhaps become a little too philosophical! Sheeeesh...maybe that is how awareness touches I am not sure. Like everyone else I have been carrying my own baggage deeply and am starting to see, when I look back at my footprints that they were carved too deeply into the snow and that they served as the only trail I knew how to (let myself) follow. Hmmmm....I can be dense sometimes. Making the leap through a tarnished past into the present and maintaining faith is the goal I only now see. I could not see it before. Previously it whispered to me from afar, remained distant, taunted me and caused tears in the middle of the night often. Oh how I wish anothers hand would rise to my cheek, brush my hair aside and simply look into my eyes during those moments. Maybe this all sounds strange, perhaps it does not make sense but it is me, it is what I feel and think now.

In reflecting on this cyber thingee I am not resolved that there is much difference between VT and RT. In fact I think there is much more "real" sharing going on in VT than RT. The mere depth of the thoughts, the energy shared and the directness conveyed are truer in many ways than most of us care to imagine or believe. It is a gift and thank you for allowing me to participate and make my footprints.