I’m going insane, the effects of emotional pain,

It’s not too late, I can not wait,

Must find a new avenue, new direction, increase my protection,

Stop the pains, change the blood for ice water in my veins,

Ignore the beaming sun, time to look after number one,

Time to strengthen my resolve, if I am to evolve,

Pull the knife from my heart, which is tearing me apart,

At an all time low, time for rebirth, time to grow,

There is still hope, if one learns to cope,

Have the courage of convictions, accept no restrictions,

Reassess, set new goals, ignore the pot holes,

It’s a long arduous fight, it won’t happen over night,

The inner self must grow, I must not let it show,

Can’t expose that I am mid and meek, I’ll become a target, weak,

Build my defenses with stone, survival skills will hone,

Show no fear, let no-one in or near,

If love finds me or I feel weak, seclusion I will seek,

Withdraw into my shell, learn to live with my personal hell,

To be alone I absolutely detest, but I think it is best,

Solitude, I must learn to embrace, to continue in this race,

Close the door, have the walls close in, I must pay for every sin,

Make it a box for one, no way to see the sun,

Cover it with dirt, no way for anyone to feel or see the hurt,

Just mark it with a plaque, here lies one that deserves the dark,

I quit, no point to fight, here comes the dark, the night,

I will hurt people no more, I will close the door,

Never again to fight, just screw the lid on tight,

Be very subdued, six foot under, eternal solitude,

No longer able to cause trouble and strife, my last wish is everyone can enjoy their life.

 

Steve Corke

9/8/97

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