I'm feeling positively desperate. If I don't get the asthma under control, I'll have to take prednisone, which is a steroid that really screws with your metabolism. Typically if I take prednisone for a month, I gain 10-15lbs. Unfortunately, as a result, it really screws with insulin and sugars. At this late date of my pregnancy, the last thing I want to deal with is high sugars...if everything is normal, she's gaining a half pound a week.

The other bummer is that the asthma meds are serious speed drugs, which while safe for the baby, have both of us feeling pretty zippy. She's been positively doing backflips in there. I feel bad having to take more albuterol when I know what it will do to her. I can sleep through anything, but it tears me up knowing she's so uncomfortable and I can't comfort or help her.

And the bottom line for me is that I'm scared to death about the steroids. And for whatever reason, the antibiotics don't appear to be cutting it, which also scares the bejeebers out of me because there are only certain ones I'm allowed to take because I can't take penicillin.

The nicest thing about now would be for the doctor to say,"Go ahead and have your disability now." At least then I don't have to worry about my sick leave getting used up at the wrong time. We'll see how the next few days unfold.