'me' and other songs of self discovery, letting be

When applying for the enriched eighth grade English class at the school I was moving to (going from TX to MN), I was required to write an essay on some short story about birds and a sorority initiation. I think it was called the initiation. It was about obeying what is within oneself instead of what is around oneself. I felt lost on the essay...somehow I found this song (I own This Fire)...and somehow it made more sense than anything made in my simple, pointless, Texas middle-school life. And then I forgot about that moment untill 2.5 years later I found the lyrics to the song on someone's website. Take from this piece what you can.

I am not the person who is singing, I am the silent one inside.
I am not the one who laughs at people's jokes,
I just pacify their egos.
I am not my house, my car or my songs,
They are only stops along my way.
I am like the winter, I'm a dark cold female
With a golden ring of wisdom in my cave.

And it's me who is my enemy.
Me who beats me up.
Me who makes the monsters.
Me who strips my confidence.

I am carrying my voice.
I am carrying my heart.
I am carrying my rhythm.
I am carrying my prayers,

That you can't kill my spirit, it's old and it is strong,
And like a mountain I'll go on and on.
But when my wings are folded,
The brightly colored moth blend's into the dirt into the ground

And it's me who is my enemy.
Me who beats me up.
Me who makes the monsters.
Me who strips my confidence.

And it's me who's too weak.
And it's me who's too shy to ask for the thing I love.
But I love...

I am walking on the bridge,
I am over the water,
And I'm scared as hell,
But I know there's something better

And it's me who is my enemy.
Me who strips my confidence
And it's me who is my enemy.
Me who strips my confidence
But it's me...

-Paula Cole

fumbling towards ecstasy

All the fear has left me now
I'm not frightened anymore
it's my heart that pounds beneath my flesh
it's my mouth that pushes out this breath

And if I shed a tear I won't cage it
I won't fear love
and if I feel a rage I won't deny it
I won't fear love [...]

Sarah McLachlan

let me fall

Let me fall
Let me climb
There’s a moment when fear
and dream must collide
Someone I am
Is waiting for courage
The one I want
The one I will become
Will catch me [...]
I will dance so freely
Holding on to no one
You can hold me only
If you too will fall
Away from all these
Useless fears and chains [...]
Let me fall
If I fall
There’s no reason
To miss this one chance
This perfect moment
Just let me fall

Cirque du Soleil's "Quidam"

more music