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THE 23 BEST MEN JOKES OF THE YEAR
1. How does a man take a bubble bath ? He eats beans for dinner.
2. How can you tell a man is sexually excited ? He's breathing.
3. What is the difference between a man and ET ? ET phones home.
4. What is a man's idea of foreplay ? A half hour of begging.
5. What is the difference between men and government bonds ? Bonds mature.
6. What did God say after creating man ? I can do better.
7. Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up ? Because they have no balls to scratch.
8. What do beer bottles and men have in common ? They are both empty from the neck up.
9. What do you call a man with half a brain ? Gifted.
10. How can you tell if a man is happy ? Who cares.
11. What does a man consider as a 7 course meal ? A hot dog and a six pack.
12. What do you have when you have 2 balls in your hand ? A man's undivided attention.
13. Why are men like laxatives ? They irritate the shit out of you.
14. Why did God create man ? Because vibrators can't mow the lawn.
15. What are the 2 reasons men don't mind their own business? 1-No mind 2-No business
16. How are men and parking spots alike ? The good ones are always taken and the ones that are left are handicapped.
17. What is the difference between a porcupine and a corvette ? The porcupine has pricks on the outside.
18. Why is it hard for women to find men who are sensitive, caring and goodlooking ? Because those men already have boyfriends.
19. How is a man like a snowstorm ? Because you don't know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will stay.
20. Why were men given larger brains than dogs ? So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.
21. How do you save a man from drowning ? Take your foot off his head.
22. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don't know, it's never been done.
23. What's a man's idea of helping with the housework ? Lifting his legs so you can vacuum |
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