Monday they started up the line and within twenty minutes had to shut it down because one worker couldn't keep up. The boss went down the line to find the problem. The new employee was very busy trying to do her part but she had a bunch of dolls waiting for her.
Closer examination showed she was sewing little cloth bags containing two walnuts in the appropriate place on the dolls.
When the boss could control his laughter he said, "Lady, I said to give each doll two test-tickles.
**************************************************************************************
The Itch That Wouldn't Quit
A teacher notices that a little boy at the back of the class is squirming around, scratching his crotch and not paying attention. She goes back to find out what's up.
He's quite embarrassed and whispers that he has just recently been circumcised and he's quite itchy. The teacher has him go down to the principal's office, to phone his Mom, and ask her what he should do about it.
He does this and returns to the class, sits down in his seat and suddenly, there's a general commotion at the back of the room.
Back down she goes, only to find him sitting at his desk with his penis hanging out. I thought I told you to call your Mom, she says. I did, he says, and she told me that if I could stick it out till noon, she'd come and pick me up from school!
******************************************************************************************
Twin brothers were named Joe and John, Joe was the owner of an old dilapidated boat(now keep this straight). It happened that John's wife died the same day that Joe's boat sank.
A few days later a kindly old lady met Joe on the street mistaking him for John, she said to him, "I'm sorry for your loss, you must feel terrible".
Joe said, "Oh hell no, fact is I'm sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing from the beginning, her bottom was all shrivelled up and she smelled like dead fish. She was always losing water, had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front which got bigger every time I used her. She leaked like crazy and it was difficult to keep her upright. But what really finished her off was when four tough guys rented her for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't any good, but they all wanted to have a go with her anyhow. The damn fools all tried to get on her at the same time and it was just too much for the old girl, while they were trying to get into their various positions she split up the middle".
The old woman fainted.