Rule # 2 If you don't want to dress like Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
Rule # 3 If we say something that can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other way.
Rule # 4 It is in neither your best interest nor ours to make us take those stupid Cosmo quizzes together.
Rule # 5 Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women how can we know how pretty you are?
Rule # 6 Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
Rule # 7 You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done-- not both.
Rule # 8 Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials or time-outs.
Rule # 9 Christopher Columbus didn't need directions and neither do we.
Rule # 10 Women who wear Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their chest stared at.
Rule # 11 When we're turning the wheel and the car is nosing onto the ramp, you saying "This is our exit" is not necessary.
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2. The Rules are subject to change at any time without prior notificaton.
3. No Male can possibly know all the Rules.
4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all the Rules, she must immediately change some or all of the Rules.
5. The Female is NEVER wrong.
6. If the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the Male did or said wrong.
7. If Rule 6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The Female can change her mind at any given point in time.
9. The Male must never change his mind without written consent from the Female.
10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The Female must, under NO CIRCUMSTANCES, let the Male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.
13. Any attempt to document these Rules could result in bodily harm.
14. If the Female has PMS, all Rules are null and void.