A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.
Do I look like a F***ing people person?
This isn't an office, It is hell with flouresent lighting.
If I want to hear the pitter pater of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cat.
Does your train of thought have a caboose?
The Bible was written by the same people who said Earth was flat.
Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?
Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?
See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.
A PBS mind in an MTV world.
Allow me to introduce my selves.
Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed!
Suburbia: where they tear out the trees & then name streets after them.
Are those your eyeballs? I found them in my cleavage.
I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
Stress is when you wake up screaming and you
realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
I have a computer, a vibrater, and pizza delivery.
Why should i leave the house?
Can I trade this job for what's behind door #2?
Okay, okay, I take it back! UnF*** you!
Macho Law prohibits me from admitting I'm wrong.
Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
Too many freaks, not enuf circuses.
Chaos, panic, & disorder---my work here is done!
A woman's favorite position is CEO.
Did I mention the kick in the groin you'll be recieving if you touch me?
I plead conteporary insanity.
And which dwarf are you?
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
How do i set a laser printer to stun?
It aint the size, it's.... no, it's the size.
Meandering to a different drummer.
I majored in liberal arts. Will that be for here or to go?