IMPROVE YOUR ATTITUDE AT WORK




TRY SAYING:  Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF:  And when the fuck do you expect me to do this? 

TRY SAYING:  I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF:  No fucking way. 

TRY SAYING:  Really?
INSTEAD OF:  You've got to be shitting me! 

TRY SAYING:  Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF:  Tell someone who gives a shit. 

TRY SAYING:  I'm not sure this can be implemented
INSTEAD OF:  This shit won't work. 

TRY SAYING:  I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF:  Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner? 

TRY SAYING:  He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF:  He's got his head up his ass. 

TRY SAYING:  Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF:  Eat shit and die. 

TRY SAYING:  I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF:  Fuck it, I'm on salary. 

TRY SAYING:  I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF:  This job sucks. 

TRY SAYING:  You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF:  Who the hell died and made you boss? 

TRY SAYING:  I see.
INSTEAD OF:  Blow me.