[Opening credits.]

Charlie Watkins – Live from the Target Center in Minneapolis, Minnesota, the home of Jesse Ventura, this is Sunday Night Shockwave. I’m Charlie Watkins and with me as always is Terry Hogan.

Terry Hogan – We’ve got another great show in store tonight, Charlie. Two titles on the line and the beginning of the tournament to crown a new Spotlight Champion.

[The prodigy mix of Methodmans 'Release Yo'delf echoes around the arena.]

Charlie Watkins – And it looks like we’re going to get things started with "Luscious" Lawrence Rhodes.

[A yellowish hue lights the entrance as ... after a pause Ebony emerges from the back. She wears a tight white tee-shirt with the an arrow pointing up and the word 'Gore' by the side and an arrow pointing down and the word 'Bush' by its side. She also wears a pair of well-worn Levi 501 Jeans and grey snakeskin boots. After a few seconds 'Luscious' Lawrence Rhodes emerges from the back. Rhodes stands looking out into crowd and a close up camera shot indicates that Rhodes is wearing a Band-Aid by the side of his left ear. He is smiling as both Ebony and himself begin the walk to the ring. Rhodes is now wearing a leopard skin tabard to match the leopard skin jodhpurs and boots. The message 'Cool Britannia' is seen on the reverse of the tabard. Once at ringside Rhodes climbs the steel steps and holds the ropes open for Ebony to enter. She ducks underneath and Rhodes follows her into the ring. He moves to pick up a mic but is stopped by Ebony. She whispers something in his ear before grabbing the mic and stepping forward to address the crowd.]

Ebony: Well, to quote Alphonse Karr ... [Ebony extenuates a clearing of her throat] Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose. Ok sorry ... in English for you Minnesota hicks ... the more things change, the more they stay the same. For too long the SWL is under valuing the heavyweight championship belt. In the year 2000 we've had Bret Real ... we've had Grinnin ... the Kid and now Johnny the Spade. A veritable mixture of sublime and ridiculous. But now all that's gotta stop. Brian Williams, you can have a watered down Stars Wrestling Limited ... with Spades strutting around slamming doors, and wrestling guys that I could beat [Ebony posses for the camera, as she bigs up her chest.] But unless you give these fans [Ebony points out around the arena to a cacophony of cat calls] the match that they want ... well your gonna see your stocks plummet mon ami. [Ebony smiles again at the crowd response.]

Ebony: You see Williams, tonight Lawrence Rhodes has to step into this ring against Kevin 'Long Intro' Steele. While the Spades defends the Championship belt in another gargantuan challenger in the shape of Ty Shun Ho. Even Billy Bolder has to face that Big Dumb F [Ebony quickly puts her hand over her mouth to stifle her giggles] Now there seems to be something missing from this card. [Ebony puts on a quizzical face] ... yes, entertainment ... maybe some .. er, entertainment, but on the otherhand .. maybe entertainment. [Ebony smiles] You see Brian Williams what the fans demand is ENTERTAINMENT ... and putting on these matches ... well just goes against what the SWL stands for in this industry today. What the people want is Johnny the Spade against Lawrence Rhodes ...

("Whatever It Takes" by POD is poured from the loudspeakers. "The Kid" Billy Rock steps out from the mouth of the entrance wearing his ring attire ... )

The Kid - What these people want is for you to get naked or shut up. (Huge response. Ebony folds her arms and sneers ... )

The Kid - After all, that is your idea of entertainment isn't it Ebony? Shouldn't you be spinning around a pole with the traditional "This Is How We Do It" from Montel Jordan in the background? (chuckle) You know, it must be really hard for you to figure out where to put the money Rhodes is paying you with pants on over that thong. (Laughter scatters through the crowd ... )

The Kid - So why don't you shut your mouth and blow it out your ass where the sh*t you're talking will land in the can where it belongs instead of in our ears. (pause) Let me ask you something, Ebony. What the hell makes you think that six foot eight fish stick standing behind you deserves a shot at MY SWL World Heavyweight Title? That ignorant limey bastard couldn't entertain this crowd with sock puppets, popcorn, and lesbian porn on the jumbo screen. He's THAT dull. Lawrence Rhodes couldn't draw flies with dog sh*t smeared across his chest, let alone a stadium full of wrestling fans. I don't care if you hate it, Rhodes. I don't care if Spades hates it. I'm owed and I'm guaranteed a rematch. And if you want a shot at the SWL World Heavyweight Title, Rhodes, you're gonna have to wait, 'cause I'm gonna get around to my title, then I'm gonna get around to you. Now—

Ebony: (interrupting) This is getting old. I want Brian Williams out here NOW! [The three stare at the entranceway. Suddenly the lights dim and purple strobe lights shine all over the arena then center on the main entrance. "Take A Look" by Limp Bizkit thunders through the building bringing boos from the crowd.]

Terry Hogan - Wait a minute that's not Brian Williams music. That music belongs to (pauses) Look it's Johnny Spades!

[Johnny Spades stands at the top of the entranceway wearing his wrestling gear and black T-shirt with the skull wearing the jokers cap on the front and the words "Don't Hate Greatness" on the back in white old english. His brown his wet and tied back in a slick ponytail and the SWL Heavyweight championship is buckled tightly around his waist. The lights come back on and Spades stares at three standing in the ring. He adjusts his blue lensed chrome shades then smirks as he brings the mic he is holding to his lips.]

Spades: You know it's kind of funny. (paces back and fourth) That little bitch standing in the middle of the ring calling out the President about who deserves a World title shot but sorry to spoil the part Ebony but as you can see I'm the damn World champion so I DECIDE who gets a title shot and who doesn't. Your question has been for the past week Ebony, just who deserves a title shot. Rhodes or Rock. Well the truth be told and all these idiot fans would have to agree. I already kicked both their asses and Rhodes I've kicked yours the most. So for you to be standing there letting some bimbo run your career just shows how desperate you are in trying to get noticed. Billy Rock you still think your the main man in this company but that title left you the minute I put my autograph on a SWL contract.

(Spades stops and points a finger at the three.)

Spades: But the question still hasn't been answered and I can tell by the way you three morons are shuffling your feet you want my decision right here, right now am I right?

(The three nod and point fingers challenging him to come down to the ring.)

Spades: Well boys, my answer is very simple. NEITHER OF YOU DESERVE A DAMN SHOT AND AS LONG AS THIS TITLE IS AROUND MY WAIST YOU'LL BE WAITING A DAMN LONG TIME TO GET ONE!! So you boys are arguing over nothing. Over a title shot I'm promising you, you will never see. So continue to beat each others heads in cause in the end it won't get you anything. The champion has spoken, the champion has laid down the law. So you two punks and the little s*** have a nice night. I have a title to defend against REAL competition.

["Take a Look" plays as Spades and the participants in the ring exit separately.]

Charlie Watkins – Wow. Spades making it clear he doesn’t see either Rock or Rhodes as qualified to challenge him for the belt.

Terry Hogan – Well, we’ll see if he gets some qualified competition later tonight when he puts his belt on the line against "The Dragon" Ty Shun Ho.

Anna Dea – This contest is scheduled for one fall. Coming down the aisle, form Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, weighing in at 234 pounds, Johnny Wonderful.

[Beck’s "Loser" plays as Johnny Wonderful makes his way to the ring.]

Anna Dea - And his opponent, weighing in at 258lbs and hailing from Indianapolis, Indiana, making his debut in the SWL, Jarred Varsity.

[The lights fade to blackness across the whole arena. Anticipation grows across the arena as the crowd’s heads turn towards the entranceway. "Prosthetics" by Slipknot starts up and, after several seconds, Jarred Varsity steps through the curtains to a fine reaction from the crowd. He is dressed in black and red wrestling tights and has a black T-shirt on which reads "Varsity Equals Victory". His long, blonde hair falls across his clean-cut face as he stands still at the top of the aisle. After soaking in some of the cheers, Varsity begins to make his way towards the ringside. He does so slowly, focusing his attentions on the match ahead of him. You can see him silently speaking to himself as he reaches the ringside area. He partly walks around the ring before stopping and clambering up onto the ring apron. With a look of concentration and determination on his face, he looks into the eyes of the audience, which react well. He then steps through the middle ropes and proceeds to climb up to the second turnbuckle of one of the corners. Varsity salutes the crowd by lifting both arms in the air. He then steps down and walks across to the opposite side, where he proceeds to do the same. Finally, he whips his T-shirt off his back and hurls it into the crowd. Varsity then starts to limber up for his match.]

Charlie Watkins- This should be interesting to watch the debut of this talented youngster Jarred Varsity as he goes against the veteran Johnny Wonderful.

Terry Hogan - Yes, I hear some great things about this rookie.

[Varsity and Wonderful circle each other a couple of times. Wonderful lunges forward towards Varsity, but Varsity swerves him and drops his more experienced opponent with a drop toe-hold. Varsity rides him and snaps on a headlock. Wonderful battles back to his feet and delivers two swift elbows to the rookie’s mid-section. Wonderful bounces off the ropes and goes to clothesline Varsity but Varsity ducks the attempt and then nails a well-executed back suplex.]

Charlie Watkins - Varsity’s showing us some good stuff here.

Terry Hogan - Simple maneuvers done well.

[Varsity delivers a DDT and tries for the cover but manages only a two. Varsity picks up his opponent and backs him into the corner. He whips Wonderful to the far side and as Wonderful rebounds Varsity explodes with a running clothesline. He goes for another cover but Wonderful lifts his left shoulder off the canvas at the count of two.]

Terry Hogan - He should improve his pin attempts though.

Charlie Watkins- Give him time, Terry, he’s still learning.

Terry Hogan - He’s certainly two steps in front of Johnny Wonderful.

[Varsity lifts Wonderful into the air with a military press before dumping him on the canvas behind him. He then springs off the ropes and drops a leg across Wonderful’s chest. He goes for the move again but Wonderful manages to move out the way. Wonderful starts delivering swift lefts and rights to Varsity’s skull as the referee tries to pull him off.]

Charlie Watkins- Ref, step in. Desperate measures by Wonderful.

[Wonderful slides out of the ring and picks up a steel folding chair.]

Charlie Watkins - Get that chair off of him, Wonderful has lost his mind.

Terry Hogan - It’s the only chance he’ll have of beating Varsity tonight.

[The referee slides out of the ring and the two battle over possession of the chair. Meanwhile, inside the ring, Varsity has climbed back to his feet. He looks over at the referee and Wonderful arguing over the chair and delivers a suicide dive, clearing the top rope easily. He catches Wonderful across the chest and the referee also falls to the floor.]

Terry Hogan - My God, he could of killed himself.

Charlie Watkins - Welcome to the SWL. Home of the unexpected. I’ve never seen anybody of his size pull off a move like that. This Varsity is special.

Terry Hogan - He could also be in a wheelchair by the time he’s 25 if he continues to try and execute moves like that.

[Varsity rolls Wonderful back into the ring and follows him into the squared circle. The referee has also recovered and, trying to shake off the cobwebs, rolls underneath the bottom rope. Varsity delivers a clothesline to the bewildered Wonderful and then signals for the end. He locks Wonderful into a reverse headlock and then spins both of them around, delivering a spinning neckbreaker.]

Charlie Watkins - What a move by Jarred Varsity.

Terry Hogan - Yes, I hear he calls it The Classic Touch. Now he’s going for the cover.

[Varsity hooks Wonderful’s leg and the referee slowly counts…1…2…3! The crowd cheers as Varsity has his hand raised by the referee. He then climbs up to the second turnbuckle to salute the fans.]

Anna Dea - The winner of this match, Jarred Varsity.

Charlie Watkins - Victory for Varsity on his debut over Wonderful.

Terry Hogan  - Well, it’s like his T-shirt says Varsity Equals Victory.

[Rebel Yell by Billy Idol plays as Brian Williams makes his way to the ring. He asks for the microphone from Anna Dea and addresses the crowd.]

Brian Williams - Good evening, Minneapolis. Now, there’s a lot going on this week, so I’ll try and be brief. First of all, Ebony, you are not in any position to demand a meeting with me. I’m a very busy man and I make the schedule around here. I pay your salary and you will abide by the schedule I set forth. You will meet with me on my time and when I am ready.

Brian Williams - Secondly, the SWL will be taking a short recess for the holidays. The card scheduled for December 17^th will be the last one of the year 2000. That card will be a marquee one that will blow the roof off of the arena. Among the matches scheduled for that night will be "The Kid" Billy Rock taking on the SWL Heavyweight Champion, whoever that may be. And to make one thing clear, I am not making this match-up because of whether The Kid does or does not deserve a title shot. That doesn’t mean anything. I am making this match because of the potential for a main event that will draw the most amount of fan interest. It’s no secret that The Kid is the most popular superstar in the SWL. Therefore, the last card of the year will feature the match that everyone wants to see.

Brian Williams - Finally, I know some of you have questions regarding this tournament, so I’ll do my best to try and answer a few of them. Nikita Morosov was stripped of the Spotlight Title for repeated offenses, the most recent of which was walking out of the title match last week involving him, "The Dragon" Ty Shun Ho, and Not Applicable. Since he did not lose the belt, I am allowing him a shot against the Ghost From Nowhere and the Quasar Title this week. It’s only fair. However, since there was no winner in that match, I feel the only fair way to go about filling that vacant title is with a tournament that involves everyone in the SWL with a valid claim to the belt. Three matches will take place tonight. The winners of all three respective matches will meet next week in a Three Way Dance that will determine once and for all…the undisputed SWL Spotlight Champion.

Williams - With that in mind, allow me to introduce the first participants. First, making his return to the SWL, from Highlands, North Carolina, weighing in at 283 pounds, "The Showstopper" Jett Jones!

["HELLS BELLS" by AC/DC booms over the PA system-the sound echoes through the whole arena-blue, white and black spotlights pan around the fans and ringside area-the spotlights stop and the whole arena is black and then.........BOOM,BAM,BOOM-Pyro explodes from the entrance area and out walks "The Showstopper" Jett Jones-He is arm & arm with Daisy-Jett has on white wrestling trunks with blue trim and on the back in big,bold letters it says "The Showstopper" in black, he also has on a pair of chrome X-METAL Oakleys-Daisy escorts The Showstopper onto the stage as she smiles and waves at the fans-The Showstopper takes her down the ramp as he is slapping the fans hands-They walk up the steps together-Jett holds the middle rope so Daisy can get in easy and then he jumps in-The Showstopper runs and jumps up onto a turnbuckle and more pyro explodes from the ring. He grabs the mic from President Williams.]

The Showstopper- Finally.........The Showstopper.......has come.........BACK!.....To Shockwave!

(fans cheer)

Terry Hogan – That sounds awfully familiar. Almost like I’ve heard it thousands of times on another TV program.

The Showstopper- Now, tonight The Showstopper has to take on a little pee-wee by the name of....John Steele! Well, Steele......I've played with your kind before and frankly......I just think that your a.........

(The Showstopper takes a breath and says the next line fast)

The Showstopper-.......Chicago,Illinois,trailer park,IEWA,piece of sorry,donkey sh*t on the bottom of my shoe rookie.......who doesn't know a thing about the business or has any in-ring ability!

Terry Hogan – HE’S one to talk.

The Showstopper- John Steele......I watched your matches while I was away and....I thought that you........SUCKED!!  Now,Steele when your walk through those curtains and strut down the ramp....looking as gay as possible........and you step in this ring and face The Greatest Wrestler on GOD'S GREEN EARTH!!!!You will have till the bell dings.......

(The Showstopper pause very quickly and begins again)

The Showstopper - .....AND THE SHOWSTOPPER MEANS TILL THE BELL ........ (pauses) ............dings! .......Before you get the greatest beating you have ever had in your pathetic career!!!!

(Tthe fans cheer)

The Showstopper - John Steele, I'm just taking time to spare these fans of seeing your pathetic, weasel, Chicago a$$!! But, I cannot talk forever..........so, John Steele.........if you think your have the testicular fortitude,.....which we know you don't,.....to come down that ramp.........The Showstopper will give you a lesson in..................................."Getting My A$$ Kicked-101"..........so, LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLet the show go on!!!!!!!

Terry Hogan – Every word that came out of his mouth was copyright infringement of some kind. If anyone cared enough, they could sue.

Brian Williams – And his opponent ["Open your Eyes" by Guano Apes starts to play over the PA system.] hailing from Chicago, Illinois, and weighing in at 263 pounds… here is… JOHN STEEEEELE!!!

[Steele parts the curtain to a roof-shaking ovation. He is wearing his usual ripped blue tights, along with a black leather jacket with the Statue of Liberty printed on the back. He is wearing his American flag bandana, and has a look of sheer intensity etched into his face. He makes his way down to the ring fairly slowly, slapping some high fives with the fans as he goes. He pauses to give his bandana to a young fan in the front row, before rolling into the ring. He removes the leather jacket, and starts stretching in the corner, anxiously awaiting the opening bell.]

Charlie Watkins – We’re kicking it off tonight with a rising star taking on someone who’s already a star

Terry Hogan – In his own mind, anyway.

[The bell rings and Steele and Jones lock up. Jones shoots Steele into the ropes and knocks him down with a shoulder block. Jones shoots himself into the ropes and Steele catches him with a hip toss. Steele drops a leg and goes for a pin. Jones kicks out at one.]

Charlie Watkins – John Steele trying to put this one away early.

[Steele picks up Jones and whips him into the corner. Steele comes in charging, but gets a foot in the face from Jones. Steele is dazed and Jones springs to the turnbuckle. Jones comes off the second rope with a flying forearm. Jones goes for a pin but only gets two.]

Charlie Watkins – The Showstopper is in control now.

[Jones Irish whips Steele into the ropes and shoots himself into the opposite ones. Steele ducks a clothesline and plants himself. Jones comes off the ropes and Steele delivers a HUGE tilt-o-whirl slam. Jones gets up and Steele moves behind him. Steele hooks Jones into a full nelson and turns it into an atomic drop. Steele signals to the crowd that it’s over.]

Terry Hogan – Don’t waste any time, Steele. Stay on him.

[Steele picks up Jones and hits the spinning backbreaker.]

Charlie Watkins – The Liberty!

[Steele makes the pin…1…2…3!]

Anna Dea – Here is your winner, John Steele!

Charlie Watkins – So John Steele will compete next week in the SWL Spotlight Title match.

Terry Hogan – That’s too bad for the Showstopper. I think he really underestimated Steele’s ability.

Anna Dea – The following contest is the second match in the SWL Spotlight Title Tournament. Introducing first, from Melbourne, Australia, weighing in at 247 pounds, "Loverboy" Brent Welch!!!

[The lights go out and Do Ya Think I'm Sexy by Entrance Begins, Pyros go off as "Loverboy" Brent Welch appears at the top of the ramp. The crowd goes wild. He rubs his chin and takes off his glasses. He slowly makes his way towards the ring pausing to sign an autograph and pose for the crowd.]

Anna Dea – His opponent, from Austrailia, weighing in at 315 pounds, MOB Squad!

["Guerrilla Warfare" by Rage Against the Machine plays as MOB Squad makes his way to the ring.]

Charlie Watkins – The second spot in the Three Way match next week on the line here.

Terry Hogan – And if memory serves me right, Charlie, this is the first time in recent memory that two Australians have gone one on one in an SWL ring.

[The bell rings and MOB Squad unloads with right hands. He whips Welch into the ropes and hits him with a big foot to the face. He comes off the ropes and drops a big elbow. MOB Squad picks up Welch and applies a waistlock. Welch sweeps MOB Squad off his feet and goes for the Lovemaker. MOB Squad clubs the side of his head and Welch goes down. MOB Squad goes for a pin but only gets two.]

Charlie Watkins – What was Welch thinking?

Terry Hogan – His mind really hasn’t been on wrestling lately. I wonder what’s up.

[MOB Squad picks up Welch and delivers a fallaway slam. He picks him up again and hits a pendulum backbreaker. MOB Squad taunts Welch to get up. MOB Squad plants Welch with a DDT.]

Terry Hogan – This is almost unfair.

[MOB Squad lifts Welch into a stalling suplex and delivers the screwdriver.]

Charlie Watkins – Screwdriver!

Terry Hogan – That should be it.

[MOB Squad makes the pin…1…2…3!]

Anna Dea – Here is your winner, MOB Squad!!!

Charlie Watkins – And MOB Squad gets a spot in the Spotlight Title match next week.

Terry Hogan – I’ve still got to wonder what’s going on with the Loverboy.

[Suddenly, the Lynch Mob sprints to ringside.]

Terry Hogan – MOB Squad better watch out!

[The Lynch Mob begin the beat down to MOB Squad. Joe Dean is carrying the chair with the massive dent given to it by his head a week ago. They place MOB Squad’s ankle in the chair and Joe Dean stomps on it hard. MOB Squad screams in pain. Security rushes out to escort the Mob to the back.]

Charlie Watkins – Someone has to do something about those two! They’re out of control.

Terry Hogan – You go up there and tell them to stop, Charlie.

Anna Dea – The following contest is our third and final match in the SWL Spotlight Title Tournament. Introducing first, from New York City, weighing in at 189 pounds, Benjamin Beautiful.

["Eine Kleine Nachtmusik" by Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart plays as Benjamin Beautiful comes to the ring in a full Armani suit, with an expensive cigar in his left hand, smoking, and one unsmoked fresh cigar and a gold zippo in the other.]

Anna Dea – His opponent, weighing in at 128 kilograms, Not Applicable!

[Bawitdaba by Kid Rock begins to play through out the arena and the fans immediately begin to boo harshly. After about 5 seconds of music Not Applicable comes out of the entrance area and heads to the ring area. He looks neither left nor right but straight ahead. He is wearing a pair of ripped up jeans, a black shirt that fails to hide his well muscled upper body. On his face is a simple black mask that conceals his true identity. When he rolls into the ring he looks at the referee and shakes his head when the referee attempts to check him and he can be overheard saying that the rules don’t apply to him and to back the hell off. He goes to a neutral corner and awaits the bell.]

Charlie Watkins – This one will determine the last man to join the fray next week for the Spotlight Title.

Terry Hogan – And I have to say I don’t like Beautiful’s chances. N/A has just been on a roll lately.

[The bell rings and N/A pounds on Beautiful’s back with forearms, taking him down to his knees. N/A runs into the ropes and drops a knee across Beautiful’s neck. N/A picks up Beautiful and whips him into the corner. N/A charges in and Beautiful gets a foot up. Beautiful springs to the top rope and comes off with a flying spinning wheel kick that knocks N/A down.]

Charlie Watkins – Beautiful has to keep moving. He’s giving away a lot of size here.

Terry Hogan – When is he not?

[Beautiful goes for a pin but only gets one. He runs into the ropes and attempts a flying body press. N/A catches him and hits a fallaway slam. N/A picks Beautiful up and delivers a gut-wrench suplex.]

Charlie Watkins – Beautiful is just being dominated here.

[N/A whips Beautiful into the ropes. Beautiful ducks a clothesline and comes back with a head scissors takeover. N/A rolls to his feet and charges Beautiful. Beautiful delivers a Japanese Arm Drag. Beautiful goes for an STF, but N/A powers out.]

Terry Hogan – You’ve got to do more damage before the submission moves.

[N/A plants Beautiful with a DDT and looks on the fallen Beautiful with some disapproval. Beautiful stands up weakly as N/A looks on, shrugging. He kicks Beautiful in the midsection…APPLICATION!!!]

Charlie Watkins – What? That came out of nowhere.

Terry Hogan – I guess he just wanted to put Benjamin Beautiful out of his misery.

[N/A makes the pin…1…2…3]

Anna Dea – Here is your winner, Not Applicable!

Terry Hogan – That man looks unbeatable lately.

[The lights in the arena suddenly go out.]

Terry Hogan – What?

Charlie Watkins – We’ve seen this the past couple of weeks.

Terry Hogan – Look out, N/A! You’ve got company.

[The lights suddenly come back up as Gemini is seen sliding under the bottom rope with a baseball bat in hand. Gemini looks around, but there is no one in the ring except Beautiful. Gemini looks around like he doesn’t know what’s going on before leaving the ring and walking to the back.]

Charlie Watkins – Where did Not Applicable go?

Terry Hogan – I’m not sure. It looked like Gemini was going to try another ambush, but Not Applicable just simply disappeared.

Charlie Watkins – Someone’s not on the right page here.

Anna Dea – The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Coming down the aisle, accompanied by Melina Vantadar and MOB Squad, from Treefall, California, weighing in at 250 pounds, Kevin Steele!

[The lights in the house die down, and go black, and several blue spotlights light the stage area. Smoke begins to pour from the grating, filling the floor from the entrance door, across the stage, and all around the ring. The techno version of the theme from "Phantom of the Opera" plays as Kevin Steele steps out into the entranceway, flanked by Melina Vantadar and MOB Squad. He slowly makes his way to the ring. Melina removes his leather jacket and he steps up onto the apron and through the ropes into the ring.]

Charlie Watkins – Kevin Steele not taking any chances here. He’s bringing MOB Squad and Melina to the ring.

Anna Dea – His opponent, from London, England, weighing in at 293 pounds, "Luscious" Lawrence Rhodes!!!

[The prodigy mix of Methodmans 'Release Yo'delf echoes around the arena. A yellowish hue lights the entrance as ... after a pause both 'Luscious' Lawrence Rhodes and Ebony emerge from the back. Ebony is now wearing a plain white tee shirt, a pair of well-worn Levi 501 Jeans and grey snakeskin boots. Lawrence Rhodes is wearing the leopard skin tabard, leopard skin jodhpurs and boots. The message 'Cool Britannia' is seen on the reverse of the tabard. The pair stands looking out into the crowd ... then they begin the walk down to the ring. Once at ringside Rhodes climbs the steel steps and holds the ropes open for Ebony to enter. She ducks underneath and Rhodes follows her into the ring. Ebony ushers Rhodes back into a corner.]

Charlie Watkins – Rhodes and Steele go one on one this week.

Terry Hogan – Do you really think Steele knows what he’s in for?

[The bell rings and the two men lock up. Rhodes easily forces Steele into the corner and hits him with several forearms. Steele tries to fight his way out, but Rhodes forces him back. Rhodes hits Steele with several shoulder thrusts and whips Steele into the ropes. Rhodes powerslams Steele.]

Charlie Watkins – It looks like Rhodes is employing a strategy of control here.

Terry Hogan – I think Kevin Steele is simply outclassed.

[Rhodes goes for an elbow drop, but Steele quickly rolls out of the way. Steele runs into the ropes and hits Rhodes with a spinning heel kick. Rhodes is staggered, but doesn’t go down. Steele delivers a tiger suplex. Rhodes goes down and Steele applies a Boston Crab. Suddenly, the Oklahoma Lynch Mob appears at the top of the ramp.]

Charlie Watkins – Not them again. Haven’t they caused enough trouble for one night?

[Steele’s attention is diverted by the Mob as they make their way to ringside. J.W. waves at Melina, terrifying her. MOB Squad goes to cut them off and Joe Dean pulls something out of his jacket and hits him from behind.]

Charlie Watkins – What was that?

Terry Hogan – It looked like a coal miner’s glove.

[The Lynch Mob cut off Melina’s escape route and Steele shouts at them from the ring. Rhodes comes from behind and delivers the running powerslam.]

Charlie Watkins – One For the Ladies!

[Rhodes makes the pin…1…2…3!!!]

Anna Dea – Here is your winner, "Luscious" Lawrence Rhodes!!!

Terry Hogan – I don’t think Steele saw it coming.

Charlie Watkins – I’m not sure Steele cares now.

[Steele goes after Joe Dean. Joe Dean tosses the miner’s glove to J.W. and brawls with Steele. In the confusion, Steele is walloped wit the glove. Joe Dean pulls a noose out of his jacket.]

Charlie Watkins – No!

[Joe Dean simply leaves the noose draped over Steele’s prone body as the Lynch Mob exits.]

Terry Hogan – Can you believe this, Charlie?

Charlie Watkins - The Lynch Mob is unstoppable.

Terry Hogan – That glove of theirs must have been loaded with something.

Anna Dea – The following contest, scheduled for one fall, is for the SWL Quasar Championship! Coming down the aisle, the challenger, from St. Petersburg, Russia, weighing in at 285 pounds, "The Russian Bear" Nikita Morosov!!!

[Curmina Burona plays as Nikita Morosov steps out into the entranceway. He is wearing his traditional orange and red gear and has his chain wrapped around the shoulders. He makes his way to the ring.]

Charlie Watkins – Morosov still carries the Spotlight Title with him.

Terry Hogan – He’s said he’ll hand it over to whoever wins the tournament, though.

Anna Dea – His opponent, from Eerie, Indiana, weighing in at 234 pounds, the SWL Quasar Champion, The Ghost From Nowhere!

["Black Hole Sun" by Soundgarden plays as The Ghost From Nowhere makes his way to the ring. The Ghost hands the Quasar belt to the referee, who takes it to the timekeeper’s table.]

Charlie Watkins – The Russian Bear gets himself a huge opportunity tonight.

Terry Hogan – He may have been stripped of the Spotlight Belt, but if he takes the Quasar Title tonight, I don’t think he’ll care.

[Morosov attacks Ghost and the bell rings. Morosov whips Ghost into the corner and charges in with a reverse elbow. Ghost stumbles out and Morosov hooks him into a belly-to-belly suplex. Morosov goes for a quick pin, but Ghost kicks out.]

Charlie Watkins – Morosov looking to put the Ghost away quickly.

Terry Hogan – Wouldn’t be a bad idea.

[Morosov whips Ghost into the ropes and lowers his head. Ghost slides underneath Morosov and punches him in the face. Ghost runs to the ropes and hits Morosov with a flying calf kick that knocks him down. Morosov gets up slowly and takes a big swing at Ghost. Ghost ducks it and quickly goes behind Morosov. Ghost delivers a German suplex and rolls with it over top of Morosov with a backward bridge pin. Morosov kicks out at two.]

Charlie Watkins – That was a unique maneuver.

Terry Hogan – The Ghost is full of tricks.

[Morosov gets up and Ghost charges him. Morosov back drops Ghost over the ropes to the outside. Morosov steps to the apron and goes for a flying forearm. Ghost sidesteps him and Morosov hits the floor. Ghost rolls Morosov into the ring. The referee is in a bad place and is caught under the rolling Morosov.]

Charlie Watkins – The referee is down.

Terry Hogan – I love this. This is when anything can happen.

[Suddenly, "When Worlds Collide" by Powerman 5000 plays and Janus makes an appearance at the entranceway, bringing the crowd to their feet.]

Charlie Watkins – What’s this?

Terry Hogan – Look, Charlie! Look! It’s Janus!

Charlie Watkins – Janus is back!

[Janus runs down to ringside and grabs the Ghost. He delivers The End to Ghost on the floor and rolls him back into the ring. Morosov drapes an arm over Ghost…1…2…3!!!]

Charlie Watkins – We’ve got a new champion!

Anna Dea – The winner of this match, and NEW SWL Quasar Champion, "The Russian Bear" Nikita Morosov!

Charlie Watkins – Morosov wins the Quasar Belt, with a little help from the returning Janus.

Terry Hogan – I can hardly believe it. We thought Janus was gone for good.

[Ghost makes his way to the back in pursuit of Janus as Morosov exits the ring. Suddenly, a figure appears from underneath the ring.]

Charlie Watkins – It’s Not Applicable!

Terry Hogan – He’s been under the ring this whole time!

[N/A taps Morosov on the shoulder. He spins around and gets a kick in the midsection…APPLICATION!!! N/A walks up the ramp and the camera follows him. N/A talks to the cameraman, with the audio being picked up on the camera mike.]

Not Applicable: Well little Nicky, you wanted to see what the Application was. You wanted to get in the way of my march to gold. Now you have your taste in front of all these great fans here in Minneapolis. The last thing I want you to think about as you lick your wounds later is that just when you thought you had it all, the masked man of the SWL ruined it all and humiliated you like a cheap Ho.

Charlie Watkins – Can you believe this, Terry?

Terry Hogan – I can’t keep track of everything that’s going on.

Charlie Watkins – Well, all we know for sure is that we’ve got a new Quasar Champion in the Russian Bear.

Anna Dea – The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Coming down the aisle, from the Dungeon of Devastation, weighing in at an even 400 pounds, "Big D" Devastation!

[Morphine by Michael Jackson blares over the arena sound system as the lights in the arena dim. A huge spotlight focuses on the entrance curtain as "Big D" Devastation makes his way out into the arena. Big D walks slowly and methodically to the ring.]

Terry Hogan – I still want to know exactly where the Dungeon of Devastation is.

Anna Dea – His opponent…from Little Rock, Arkansas, weighing in at 248 pounds, "The Kid" Billy Rock!!!

["Whatever it Takes" by POD blares over the loudspeakers as "The Kid" Billy Rock takes a step into the aisle and pushes a hard glance toward the ring, settling on Big D. He swipes his finger across his throat and the music dies. The Kid's deep, gravely voice bounces off the microphone he holds mere inches from his lips...]

The Kid - You really think you've made it, don't you Big Dump? Johnny Spades one week, Billy Rock the next. Someone must think you've got the tools to wield yourself an upset, right?

(The Kid slowly swings his head from side to side ... )

The Kid - I'm gonna let you in on the truth. (pause) Johnny Spades couldn't care less about your pissing and moaning. In fact he hadn't the slightest idea who you were until his eyes sunk to the very bottom of the ladder where he saw you struggling to get your foot on the first rung. That's when he decided that you'd be his first defense. That's when Johnny Spades decided to carve that scar in your forehead with my belt. I know you didn't deserve that title shot. The fans know you didn't deserve that title shot. Johnny Spades knows you didn't deserve that title shot. But every ounce of all the common sense in this building knows that you deserve what I'm just a few seconds from doing to you.]

(The fans cheer as Billy begins walking the aisle ... )

The Kid - Next week, just to cover their own tracks, to manufacture the logic of putting you anywhere near the height of the card, the SWL will say "Big D lost, but he put up a hell of a fight", no matter how much humiliation you take home with you tonight. You know who else put up a "hell of a fight" against "The Kid" Billy Rock? Michael Cage! Attitude Adjuster! Rizzo! But I'll walk out of this arena and forfeit this match to you right this second if you can tell me where one of them is right now, 'cause they sure as hell ain't here. I've ended more careers than old age, Big Dump, so you better hope you hit your golden years before I hit that ring.]

[The Kid drops the mic and races down the aisle, sliding under the bottom rope]

Charlie Watkins – Big D is out for payback tonight.

Terry Hogan – That’s right. After last week, when Rock cost him the Heavyweight Title, you can bet there’s going to be some pain dished out here in Minneapolis.

[The bell rings and Rock and Big D meet at the center of the ring. They exchange some words and Rock tells Big D to suck it. Big D clubs the side of the head of Rock, knocking him for a loop. Big D whips Rock into the corner and nails him with a body avalanche.]

Terry Hogan – I don’t think it was smart of The Kid to raise the ire of the man he cost the SWL Title.

[Rock stumbles out of the corner and Big D charges at him again. Rock instinctively pulls the top rope down and Big D takes a tumble to the outside. Rock steps out to the apron and hits Big D with a flying forearm. He takes Big D and rams him into the ringpost. He Irish whips Big D, but Big D reverses it and Rock slams into the steel steps.]

Charlie Watkins – Nice reversal by Big D.

Terry Hogan – Rock can’t try and match power with this guy or he’s going to lose in a hurry.

[Big D rolls rock into the ring. Big D whips Rock into the ropes. Rock ducks Big D’s clothesline and comes back with a spinning heel kick that stuns the big man, but doesn’t knock him down. Rock shoots himself into the ropes and connects with a flying knee that does.]

Terry Hogan – That’s what he’ll have to do: keep the big man on the mat.

[Rock slides to the outside and grabs the microphone from Anna Dea.]

Charlie Watkins – What’s he doing?

[The Kid stands over Big D who is on his butt, slouched in the corner.]

The Kid - Pull your fat ass up, Big Dump! Where's that "hell of a fight" I expected from you? Huh?

[The Kid pulls Big D up by the hair, drives a forearm into his face, and turns him around. Big D leans over the ropes facing the crowd. The Kid grabs the back of his pants and jerks upward, pulling the fabric between Big D's large, dimpled butt cheeks. A wedgie. Laughter sweeps the crowd.]

The Kid - I gotta entertain myself somehow, you boring bag o' sh*t.

[The Kid drops the mic and Big D gets up quickly and goes for his belly-to-belly suplex. Rock gives him a low blow. Rock plants Big D with a DDT. He steps to the second turnbuckle and comes off with a flying leg drop. He signals to the crowd that it’s all over. He strains and lifts Big D onto his shoulders in the torture rack and slams him down with the Death Valley Driver.]

Charlie Watkins – Kingdom Come!

Terry Hogan – Big D won’t get up from that.

[Rock makes the pin…1…2…3!!!]

Charlie Watkins – And Billy Rock wins it.

Terry Hogan – Give Big D credit for trying, but he’s just not quite on the level of the former champion.

[The Kid stands on the apron with a microphone, leaning on the top rope, watching the sluggish movement of his opponent on the mat...]

The Kid - Now you know the truth, you fat, worthless f*ck. While you lay there, rolling from side to side, straining to get the circulation going in your legs, you got nothing but the truth to stand up to. But if I were you ... I'd just stay there.

[The Kid drops the mic and walks up the aisle, high fiving his fans ... He gets tot the top of the ramp and turns around to take in one more applause. Suddenly, Rhodes bursts through the curtain and tackles him. He rams Rock’s arm into the security railing and stomps on his shoulder several times.]

Terry Hogan – What’s he doing?

Charlie Watkins – I think he’s trying to injure The Kid’s shoulder.

Terry Hogan – He might be trying to take away Rock’s chance at a title shot.

[Rhodes begins to drag Rock by his arm towards the back. They reach the door to the parking garage and Rock begins to fight back. Ebony distracts him and Rhodes rams him into the garage door. Ebony hits the button and the door opens. Rhodes tosses him out and slams the door shut. He wedges the door off its track and pulls on it to make sure it won’t open. Pounding on the other side of the door is heard.]

Rhodes – Enjoy the night air, Billy!

[Cut back to: ringside.]

Charlie Watkins – Lawrence Rhodes has locked The Kid out of the arena!

Terry Hogan – Rock is stuck somewhere out in the parking garage.

Anna Dea – The following contest, scheduled for one fall, is for the SWL Heavyweight Championship! Coming down the aisle, the challenger, from Osaka, Japan, weighing in at 230 pounds, "The Dragon" Ty Shun Ho!!!

["Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns and Roses plays as a weird Japanese symbol shows on the jumbotron. An explosion of red and green go off as Ty Shun Ho walks out. He stands on the outside of the ring and flips over the ropes to the middle of the ring. He flexes his biceps.]

Anna Dea – His opponent, accompanied to the ring by Steph, from Las Vegas, Nevada, weighing in at 285 pounds, he is the SWL Heavyweight Champion of the World, Johnny Spades!

["Take a Look" by Limp Bizkit plays as the lights dim. Purple lights flash and Johnny Spades walks out, with Steph by his side. Spades looks around at the booing crowd, then unstraps the belt from his waist and puts his muscular arms in the air mocking the crowd. Spades stands on the turnbuckle bugging the fans.]

Charlie Watkins – What an opportunity for The Dragon to add another title belt to his resume.

Terry Hogan – It won’t be easy, though. He’s giving up six inches, fifty-five pounds, and he’s gotta be nervous as hell getting in there with the best in the game.

[Spades charges and takes a big swing and Ho. Ho ducks it and fires back with right hands. The bell rings. Ho gets Spades into the corner and unloads with loud knife-edge chops. The crowd lets out a ‘wooo’ with each one. Ho whips Spades into the opposite corner. Spades reverses it and goes for a reverse elbow. Ho moves out of the way. Spades turns around and gets a roundhouse kick to the gut and a snap roundhouse to the head that gets an ‘uuhwaa’ from the audience.]

Charlie Watkins – The Dragon is hitting him with everything here in the early going. Spades may be in for some trouble.

Terry Hogan – OK, OK. Ty Shun Ho surprised Johnny Spades, but how long can it last, Charlie? Really.

[Spades uses the ropes to pull himself up as Ty Shun Ho readies himself. He charges in with a spinning heel kick, but Spades swats him away. Spades takes the left leg of Ho and places it on the bottom rope. Spades springboards off the ropes and comes down across Ho’s leg. Spades slides under the bottom rope, grabs Ho’s leg, and rams it into the ringpost.]

Charlie Watkins – What is this now? Spades seems to be going after The Dragon’s leg.

Terry Hogan – Ty Shun Ho is one of the best aerial wrestlers in the game, but when he’s grounded against a man like Spades, he’s little more than a punching bag.

[Spades goes to ram Ho’s leg into the post again and taunts the crowd. Suddenly, Ho pulls Spades in hard and his face connects with the post. Spades staggers and Ho vaults over the ropes with a forward moonsault. Ho rolls Spades back into the ring.]

Charlie Watkins – It looks like Ty Shun Ho is going to stick to his aerial offense even with that bad wheel.

Terry Hogan – It’s the only thing he can do, Charlie. He’s up against the Heavyweight Champion.

[Ty Shun Ho whips Spades into the ropes and connects with a flying calf kick. Spades gets up slowly and Ho goes for a hurricanrana. Spades grabs the legs of Ho and drives him down hard with a sit-down powerbomb. The referee counts Ho’s shoulders down…1…2…Ho kicks out.]

Terry Hogan –How’d he do that?

[Spades applies an Indian Deathlock and wrenches back hard. Ho screams in pain, but won’t give up. Ho drags himself to the ropes and Spades breaks the hold at the count of 4. Ho gets up, visibly limping. Spades runs in and soccer kicks the leg out from under Ho. Spades raises his arms and takes in the boos.]

Charlie Watkins – It looks now like Johnny Spades is almost enjoying himself.

Terry Hogan – Why not? He’s showing the world why he is the best in the business.

[Spades whips Ho into the corner and stands on the second turnbuckle. He punches Ty Shun Ho repeatedly and then blatantly chokes him. As the referee tries to pull Spades off, Ho low-blows him.]

Charlie Watkins – Low blow!

Terry Hogan – That’ll stop anyone; even Spades.

[Spades grimaces and falls to the mat. Ty Shun Ho slowly climbs the turnbuckle as Spades remains on the mat. The crowd comes alive and Ho hits a beautiful 450 splash.]

Charlie Watkins – What a move! We’ve got a new champion!

[Ho makes the cover…1…2…Spades kicks out at the very last second.]

Terry Hogan – No we don’t. Spades kicked out.

Charlie Watkins – I don’t necessarily like that call. That was a three count.

[Spades rolls to the outside and Ty Shun Ho follows him out. Ho goes to ram Spades into the announce table, but Spades blocks it and Ho gets a face-full of wood. Steph goes to the timekeeper’s table and tosses Spades a chair. Spades smashes the leg of Ty Shun Ho and the referee calls for the bell.]

Anna Dea – The winner of this match as a result of a disqualification, Ty Shun Ho!

Charlie Watkins – That son of a bitch! He used the chair to save his title.

Terry Hogan – The Dragon won the match, but not the belt.

[Spades rolls Ty Shun Ho into the ring and places the chair on the mat. He delivers the Royal Flush to Ho on top of the chair.]

Charlie Watkins – Come on now! You’ve done your business; this is too much.

[Spades takes the chair and places Ho’s leg in it. He stomps the chair. Suddenly, Wagner’s "Ride of the Valkyries" kicks in.]

Terry Hogan – What?

Charlie Watkins – It’s Justin Arcola!  Here to save his old tag team partner!

[Arcola sprints to the ring and slides under the bottom rope. Spades takes the chair and swings hard at Arcola’s head. Arcola ducks it and gives a German Suplex to Spades, who drops the chair. Arcola drags Spades over to the chair and delivers the double-underhook piledriver directly on top of it.]

Charlie Watkins – ARCOLA DRIVER! ARCOLA DRIVER ON THE CHAIR!!!

Terry Hogan – Is he nuts? That’s the SWL Champion.

[Arcola helps Ty Shun Ho out of the ring and down the aisle. He stops and turns back to Spades, who is getting up slowly. Spades’ head is busted wide open from Arcola’s attack. Spades points at Arcola and shouts some obscenities.]

Terry Hogan – Justin Arcola better watch his back. He has no idea exactly who he’s messing with.

[Arcola and Ho walk to the back and are passed by Ebony, who walks down to the center of the ramp.]

Charlie Watkins – But wait! It’s not over yet.

[Ebony berates Spades, and Spades makes a questionable hand gesture towards her. Ebony points at Spades and mouths the words, "Behind you". The camera cuts back and, suddenly, Lawrence Rhodes is there.]

Terry Hogan – Wait a minute! Where’d he come from?

[Rhodes taps Spades on the shoulder. He boots Spades in the midsection, drapes him over his shoulder, and delivers the running powerslam.]

Charlie Watkins – One For the Ladies!

Terry Hogan – This has not been a good night for our champ.

[Rhodes and Ebony meet in the aisle and make their way to the back. The camera follows them to the parking garage, where Rhodes locates his car. He unlocks the door and holds it open for Ebony. As he goes around to the driver’s side, a revving engine is heard outside the main garage door. Rhodes goes to listen, then suddenly realizes what is going on and delivers his classic deer-in-the-headlights pose.]

Terry Hogan – Get out of there, Lawrence!

[Rhodes attempts to get away, but the garage door explodes off its hinges and flattens Rhodes as the grill of a truck comes into view, barreling through what used to be the entranceway. The camera pans up to the windshield and Billy Rock is at the wheel.]

Charlie Watkins – My God! Lawrence Rhodes just ate a mouthful of garage door, courtesy of The Kid! The pace just keeps getting quicker folks. What will Spades do to Justin Arcola? Will Ebony get her meeting with Brian Williams? Who will the new Spotlight Champion be? Tune in next week to find out. Until then, for Terry Hogan, I’m Charlie Watkins. Keep reaching for those Stars!