Unless you've been living under a rock, you have seen me in my present capacity as trustee music director on Space Ghost Coast to Coast,which you can input via Cartoon Network.

And now, lettuce prey.

4/19/00...Communicator keeps shutting down on me, I just put in an update and during Preview it quit and I'm having to do it again. Damn, I wish I knew why it does that. It's always at the worst possible time.

Had nothing, really. Just that I put up a new tea site with register.com using their free page builder so now lunatrix.net is an actual place. Hopefully it will be indexed in another week or so.

I've got new landlords again and my rent is being boosted another $30. I'm going to stick it out for now since I can't move and this is as cheap as it gets in Prescott.

I'm trying to get a trip to California together with Missy Ann for the end of the month to visit my aged mother, she's not doing well. The fatigue is making a big deal out of it. Nothing in the way of day to day stuff gets done. Everything is too much trouble. Am taking the Serentil at night and sleeping late. It has calmed me down however. Everything is a trade-off.

Going to try to save this, good luck to me.

2/21/00...I tried, I really tried....to get off the Serentil. Got set up with generic Librium, a disaster. It was nothing like the Librium I had used 4 years ago. I got the okay to step up to 50 mgs. and the more I took the worse my stomach behaved. I couldn't keep the stuff down, eating or not. And it wasn't even very effective...I think it was a poor quality generic. I've run into those before. So I quit the stuff without so much as withdrawals ( I was on it for a month ). So I'm back at square one and I had wanted to have my business up and running by now but I'm so depressed I can hardly get out of bed.

So I was going into the herbal tea business...got the site up, 16 Herb Mu Tea , finally got the tea after taking forever clearing customs, which depressed me further, and have only to open up. It's just not happening, I can't get back into the mood. It's really good tea, though.

We're having our first decent rain of the winter here in Prescott and it's making me so relaxed I'm napping the day away.

1/10/00...That Y2K thing was sure a yawn. Even I was surprised there wasn't a bigger disruption.

Spent Christmas at MissyAnn's with the girls. One of her friends was selling her printer so I bought it and finally have one after two years without. It's used but hardly and does a nifty job. The handbook for the software I bought seems unduly complicated, seems best just to dive in and follow your nose. Anyway Christmas was fun.

In a manic state I bought a domain name and am thinking about going into e-business on a small scale. Am saying no more right now, wait and see what happens. First I have to get off this damn Serentil. Yes, I am still complaining. I see the doc this week and we're going to do something different, I'm not sure what yet.

So far I have narrowly avoided crashing the Corolla, the traffic around here is TERRIBLE. Having no concentration only makes it worse. Let's see, how can I finish up on a positive note? Oh, we had a few inches of snow...that was nice.

11/26/99...I really must look at the guestbook more often. In answer to your question I had been using Serentil because it was cheap, however I did finally talk the not-for-profit clinic I am going to into trying Risperdal which was not sufficiently effective on anxiety and am now on Zyprexa which seems to be nearly identical in effect to Risperdal. In other words pretty useless so far. We had been working on the assumption that my problem was related in some degree to schizophrenia but I am having doubts about how true that may be since antipsychotics are not much help. I feel much better on certain benzodiazapenes but invariably develop a tolerance. I don't seem to be bipolar but started out with a depression that, in recent years, has developed a stubborn strain of anxiety and agitation. There you have it, sort of.

Thanksgiving was depressing as usual, I'd almost marry again for a full-dress turkey dinner once a year. I never watch football but I did see Dan Marino embarrass himself yesterday.

And to my other guest, I'll take you up on that beverage as soon as I get back to Oregon. I just need a van.

10/31/99...Happy Halloween!

I've been pretty spooky myself lately. My electric water heater burned out over a week ago. It was four days before a replacement was brought out and the new one sprung leaks twice. The second time was during the night and put my bathroom under water. Fortunately my landlord brought out his shop vac and got up most of the water that I couldn't. In any case I am finding it impossible to trust the thing and it's tucked in under the bathroom sink in a horrible place to get to. I have got my fingers crossed that it gives no more trouble.

MissyAnn seems to be offline lately, I have heard nothing from there in a week.

Lightning blew out my modem a few weeks back. I always disconnect during thunderstorms but this strike hit nearby with no warning. I found a replacement at Wal-Mart for $50 and it installed easily with no trouble.

My neighbors have been squabbling lately. I have more or less decided that I'm going to be here through the winter, this car that I bought wouldn't be of much use trying to haul my stuff to Oregon, although maybe I could cram the computer into it. It works well around town and I don't have the energy to attempt any longer trips. I'm still using the antipsychotic for anxiety control and feel unenthusiastic about everything most of the time.

9/2/99...Well we got through August alive and well. This August here in Prescott was very mild, nothing over 90 degrees and I am grateful. The new cooler worked well and we had plenty of monsoon action with a substantial amount of rain ( for this place, anyway; hey, Oregon it's not ).

So why wasn't there any updates in August....? Well it was a mite warm and I am still using the Serentil antipsychotic for anxiety and ambition is thus scarce. I still want to retain my ring membership and get those hundred or so hits per month and the occasional guestbook entries as an ego stroke but I don't think I logged on twice last month, just email between here and Kingman and Sedona and Thermal. What a life!

Latest news is I bought a Pokemon in the form of a 1981 Corolla. I was able to save up a few bucks, having no auto expenses, and a friend of MissyAnn's had this one for sale. The whole deal was done via email and I was able to reach Spyder to have a look at it for me. I want to thank everyone involved, it wouldn't have happened without you.

Having not driven in two years, I find the whole business a little intimidating...traffic is fierce as anywhere around here and I am a bit out of practice. However I'm sure it will go along way toward relieving my isolation. Just imagine, Wal-Mart fixes any old time.

Don't know if I mentioned that my caseworker had fled to Phoenix some time back. The Center called the other day and they have a new girl in training and she should be set to go in another month. I wonder how much trouble I can make for her. Stay tuned for details as they become available.

7/14/99...I wound up back here at Geocities because the Xoombar was trapping people in frames...and I notice the watermark that infuriated me is no longer. Kudos to Yahoo and I hope we aren't in for some disappointing gimmick in the future. Hopefully I can exhale and sit a spell. I have spent the afternoon trying to tidy up and have more to do, the frames situation at Xoom was worse than I thought and I have yanked a bunch of links back and forth to keep my site from causing problems. I understand that a tag of code can eliminate the problem but I am as disgusted with Xoom as I was with Geocities when I moved over there, before the Xoombar.

If I could only be sure that someplace intended to remain user and visitor-friendly, I would dismantle some of the flotsam I've assembled over the last couple of years and that is spread all over tarnation. I don't feel like Yahoo has made this place too warm and fuzzy yet, anything can happen. But for now the war has settled down around here and alot of folks have gone home to lick their wounds.

I wonder what the character limit is on this editor, I surpassed it one time and it quit accepting input and I had to file some entries away.

7/12/99...They put you through alot with this new log-in, you have to go through a few hoops to get to the editor including stopping at the "Terms of Service" page and acceptance of same. I doubt I'll ever read the thing.

As some of you know, I live in Prescott, Arizona where it is monsoon season, and we're getting a good sprinkling today. I hope it lets up later so that I can go shopping. I'm completely out of snacks. Fortunately for the chow across the street who was tied to a tree in the yard, mistress appeared and rescued him or her. I feel sorry for that dog...he/she spends time in the yard all alone for the better part of the day, entangling itself in the gas meter and the telephone pole. Why is it that dogs who are so restrained can never figure out why their leash is shorter than it was last loop around their space and they never retrace their steps to restore their limited range of movement?

Man, am I showing signs of loopiness today.

Some good prose and webwork can be found at a site whose proprietor was featured, with others, in a film documentary that aired on HBO called "Homepage".It can be found at http://www.awaken.org . Check it out if you are so inclined.

Last night I received notice that I am once again in the webring and it seems to be working as it should.Thank you, Kym. I'll try to behave myself.

7/5/99...Man oh man. Things have changed some around here with a new log-in procedure and whatnot. Forced into an update due to circumstances...I was notified that I needed new Open Pages code on the mirror at Xoom because the xoombar was trapping people in frames. So I put in a short update and swapped out the code and have been waiting to get back in...then Melissa tells me my site at Xoom is down and can't be found. The status page says member sites are online so I don't know what's up.

So...I have reset my account with Open Pages to direct here again because I was not happy as I thought I was going to be at Xoom.They put that advertising bar up soon as I moved in...and no online editor (even though it was promised)...so I am back here. (I really found FTP to be something of a pain.)

The mania that got these sites up and running in the first place has been dealt a mortal blow by the use of antipsychotic medication. I'm still adjusting and maybe I'll get back into it, maybe I won't. So hang in and we'll see what develops.

5/24/99...Good lord, what's this? An update after months of quiet! Yes, I am still alive and kicking and trying to fend off the massive disinterest generated by the antipsychotic that they are giving me (Serentil) and that I have complained about previously. Evidently, the bod has gotten a bit tolerant to the stuff, I had a panic attack on the way to group 10 days ago and have been wary of attending since. Agoraphoria is in control, and all I seek is safety...so I have been staying home. The only problem with that is that the new owners of this 4-plex that I live in have been here daily for the past two months, ceaselessly hammering, sawing, painting and making privacy impossible. It's busy as an anthill around here all the time (well,at least four hours a day). One good thing has come out of it, I have a swamp cooler now, and summertime should be a breeze to endure this year.

Plans for moving back to the Oregon coast, so far, have come to naught. No word from my cohorts concerning a place to stay, still no car, and finances are not that healthy. I am not able to come up with any solution to this one. Time to put my fate in the hands of Providence. So, I will tell the doctor about the problem with panic next time I see him, try to relax the summer away, and dream about the surf splashing on my bare feet. Any other charitable resolutions will receive due consideration. Don't be a stranger.

3/21/99...Long time, no see. If I don't do an update, they'll probably kick me out of Open Pages.You know if you don't space after punctuation in Arial (it's been pointed out to me) it looks like hell. Kind of a hard habit to develop, though.
As you know, I have been wanting to go back to coastal Oregon since I endured a summer here in Prescott. Well, the apartments have sold and the new owner is a real hard-nose. Three of the four units were occupied and we're all moving. He told me my rent is going up, and the other two won't give up their dogs. I still have no car and am freaking out about what a massive undertaking a move is going to be. I am hoping for help in getting my act together, here and in Oregon, between now and May or June 1st.

Shortly after the last update, MissyAnn brought the girls down. Without a doubt, I have the most gorgeous granddaughters on the planet. A couple of absolute dolls. I must see them more often than I have been able to do.

Been attending classes at the clinic, it's been a nice social diversion, but I'm afraid they haven't convinced me of much. I don't respond to behavior modification and, in my opinion, cognitive therapy is just so much BS. Nevertheless, I've enjoyed getting out a couple times a week.

Still battling meds, am way down on my dose of the antipsychotic, Still seem to find it hard to turn on the computer, bad case of writer's block.

Well, the rain has let up at Darlington, talk to you later.

< back two < previous < [ list all | next five ]

This Webring site owned by Zorak2k.

> next > ahead two > [ random | open pages ]

LinkExchange Member

Free Home Pages at GeoCities