A shout out to the home and others
Jason- grand master of bitchiness. The king of lying for useless reasons, and not saying a word but making himself perfectly clear. A good bitch partner. Has mastered the skill of keeping his parents clueless about what he does. Always in the shower, "Jason, Jason in showa." False ninga, has no skills unless on skates. Proud keeper with Kelvin of snuggle bear rights. Has moved on in many ways with NYU grass and cute Asians/Persian chicks. Has bitches in both cities. Pillars....."fuck!"
Jeff- I must say I am jealous. I hate you, you suck, and I hate reading your storybook emails. Jeff goes to school, Jeff does well, Jeff gets women, Jeff learns how to play new sport in 5 seconds. A master of sarcasm, oldies and old school rap. Learned how to drive a car with no handle on a stick shift using nothing but an emergency break. Lightning quick speed, and can beat any human down is seconds when Sherry is mentioned. Knows how to hide substances in finesse hair spray bottles. Man that invented the theory of going for a good looking guy instead of an ugly chick! Has formulated a new theory on kinetic friction using two heads in-order to ignite a fire.
Aaron-Dork. Quit possibly the whitest man alive. Has a gun rack and shotguns on every car. Neighbors own cows and have farms. Excels at all white sports including bowling, darts, juggling and being dumb. Master of mighty taco, probably could hold head manager spot without ever working there. Managed to do nothing at Getzville Pharmacy, and give 150% discounts without being caught. A true hero, skied down a rocky, muddy, bump filled mountain to save a girls life. Then fell and cute his knee open. Still managed to hoist girl over shoulder, ski down the mountain on one leg and rescue her. Upon completion of trail was met by thousands of cute ski bunnies who all jumped him. Manages to see Clarence at every unforeseen location on earth with a different guy each time.
Ravi-Brown Brothers. Has memorized every trivia pursuit card in the box. Loves to play Ping-Pong with a ping pong BAT! Says he nevers studied even though he is a big fat liar. Has been on more substances at once then any other human still alive. Reacts heavily to an overdose of coffee by convulsing and making funny noises and faces. Possesses the most amount of talent of any member in Shehzad. Has his own patented basketball move where he picks up the offensive guard in the air and slams him to the ground. Has every CD known.
Kelvin-Also serves as a good bitch partner. Now weighs less then me! Had a kick ass car that went 0-60 in 20 minutes or so. Thinks he can beat me out to snuggle bear possession! Part inventor of sausage pact, and continues to beat sausage because of pact. Representer of West Coast in the boys group. Talks trash about west coast to Chow and I buts gots no beef. Tells great Mc'Dees stories. Dressed like a pimp at prom. Also member, with Ravi, of the "I hate girls whose first name is Chr---- group."
Leng-A true bro. Always there, always supportive, always willing to open the Ung Deck Bar. A 28 year old man with an under 21 license. Destined to find a new chick to mess with. Natural Pooh Bear. Manages to run up a $500 dollar phone bill while "relaxing" and not saying a word due to the high level of "relaxing". Has the BUTT, which causes havoc under the boards while playin b-ball. For some reason, must always be freaked by me at every party we go to. Safest driver on earth. A Guido hater, and a sparky lover. Alligator, Alligator. Bald head is nice to rub because (all you perverts will love this one) it feels soft!
Idol- Southern general in Past life. Gettin made play at FSU. Turns into a freak that won't get off Dan Rubins "man area" when "relaxing". Re-acted civil war in kitchen. Disappeared since school started because his lazy ass won't write. Fellow frat boy. Contracted the same syndrome I had Junior year.
Bernie-Jugglin skills. Should grow up to work in a circus or play with computers. Master of making milkshakes and other various blends. Makes funny faces while playin ball. Fellow non-meat eater. Will save the lives of thousands of innocent animals like me. Neighborhood buddy. Had a awesome fourth grade birthday at Major Magics. Also engineered a highly accurate tennis ball shooter for 8th grade science Olympiad. Has mutant facial hair that is different from the hair on his head. Constantly touring the world.
Also a shout out to all the other boys on the list: Stan, DKim, Kotok, Nate Dogg and the fag police, Senthil "I try to hide the fact that I am Indian" Rajakrishnan, Ev Dogg, Dan "Son of Barb and Stu" Rubin, and others. Thanks to Senthil for signing the page, but he still nothing by a crotcher.