It's A Girl Thing
Everyday i give thanks to God,
I have two mounds upon my bod.
I shave my legs, sit down to pee,
I can justify any shopping spree.
Can balance my checkbook, can pump my own gas,
Can talk to my girlfriends about the size of my ass.
I don't drive in circles at any cost,
And don't have a problem admitting I'm lost.
I don't brag about the size of my "cup",
Hey, put the seat down, i won't leave it up.
I never forget an important date,
You just gotta deal, I'm usually late.
I don't watch movies with lots of gore,
Don't need instant replay to remember the score.
I won't lose my hair, and don't get jock itch.
And just 'cause I'm assertive, don't call me a bitch.
Don't say to your friends "oh yeah, I can get her",
In your dreams, my dear, I can do better!
Flowers are okay, but jewelry is best.
Would you look at my face, not at my chest.
I don't have a problem expressing my feelings,
I know when you're lying, you look at the ceiling.
Don't call me a girl, a babe, or a chick,
I am a WOMAN, get it, you prick?
Let me tell you men,
Listen to me boys,
Those things in your pants,
That you treat as toys,
You love them more then we ever will,
We would rather suck on a cold pickled dill.
I know all you men Think that you're "IT",
But compared to a woman,
You just ain't SHIT