Why do they report power outages on TV?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is bra singular and panties plural?
Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
Why is the word "abbreviation" so long?
What's another word for thesaurus?
If your cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
If a stealth bomber crashes in the forest, will it make a sound?
When companies ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
If the #2 pencil is so popuar, why is it still #2?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultry?
If the world is all a stage, where is the audience sitting?
If one synchrinized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
How is it possible to have a civil war?
If the black box of a flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of the stuff?
Why is there and expiration date on sour cream?
If most accidents occur within five miles of home, wh doesn't everyone just move 10 miles away?
If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay us to do it?
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot them?
If you're born again, do you have two belly buttons?
If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Is a castrated pig disgruntled?
What happenes when none of your bees wax?
Where are we going? And what's with this handbasket?
If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters wearing sheets aren't going as ghosts but as mattresses?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself is it considered a hostage situation?
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you, but when you take him in a car, he sticks his head out the window?
Did you know that five out of four people have trouble with fractions?
If a tin whistle is made out of tin (which it is), then what exactly is a fog horn made of?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk I have a wok station....
What do they call a coffee break at the Lipton Tea company?
If FEDEX and UPS were to merge, would they call it FED UP?
If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, would her name be Olivia Newton-John-Newton-John?
If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, would she become Sondra Locke Ness Monster?
If Liv Tyler married Judge Lance ito, then divorced him to marry Jerry Mathers, would she be Liv Ito Beaver?
If Bo Derek married Don Ho, would she be Bo Ho?
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
Can Atheists get insurance for acts of God?
If they arrest the Energizer Bunny, would they charge it with battery?
How come you never hear about gruntled employees?
How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while your ahead"?!
If vegetable oil comes from vegetables, what does baby oil come from?
Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?
What hair color do they put on the drivers license of a bald man?