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> 1) Aircraft Registration
>
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>
> This was actually posted very briefly on the McDonnell Douglas website
> by an employee there who obviously has a sense of humor. The company,
> of course, does not (have a sense of humor) and made the web
> department take it down immediately.
>
> -----
>
> Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In
> order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to
> fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey
> questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop
> new products that best meet your needs and desires.
>
> 1.
>
> [_] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [_] Lt. [_] Gen.
> [_] Comrade [_] Classified [_] Other
> First Name: ............... Initial: .. Last Name: ...............
> Code Name: .............. Password: ........ (max 8 char)
> Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: .... .... ....
>
> 2. Which model aircraft did you purchase?
>
> [_] F-14 Tomcat
> [_] F-15 Eagle
> [_] F-16 Falcon
> [_] F-117A Stealth
> [_] Classified
>
> 3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 19../../..
>
> 4. Serial Number: ..............................
>
> 5. Please check where this product was purchased:
>
> [_] Received as gift / aid package
> [_] Catalog showroom
> [_] Independent arms broker
> [_] Mail order
> [_] Discount store
> [_] Government surplus
> [_] Classified
>
> 6. Please check how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product
> you have just purchased:
>
> [_] Heard loud noise, looked up
> [_] Store display
> [_] Espionage
> [_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally
> [_] Political lobbying by manufacturer
> [_] Was attacked by one
>
> 7. Please check the three (3) factors that most influenced your
> decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product:
>
> [_] Speed / maneuverability
> [_] Price / value
> [_] Comfort / convenience
> [_] Kickback / bribe
> [_] Recommended by salesperson
> [_] McDonnell Douglas reputation
> [_] Advanced Weapons Systems
> [_] Backroom politics
> [_] Negative experience opposing one in combat
>
> 8. Please check the location(s) where this product will be used:
>
> [_] Iraq
> [_] North America
> [_] Central / South America
> [_] Iraq
> [_] Europe
> [_] Africa
> [_] Iraq
> [_] Asia / Far East
> [_] Misc. Third World countries
> [_] Iraq
> [_] Aircraft carrier
> [_] Classified
>
> 9. How would you describe yourself or your organization?
> (Check all that apply:)
>
> [_] Communist / Socialist
> [_] Terrorist
> [_] Crazed
> [_] Neutral
> [_] Democratic
> [_] Dictatorship
> [_] Corrupt
> [_] Primitive / Tribal
>
> 10. Your occupation:
>
> [_] Homemaker
> [_] Sales / marketing
> [_] Revolutionary
> [_] Clerical
> [_] Mercenary
> [_] Tyrant
> [_] Middle management
> [_] Eccentric billionaire
> [_] Defense Minister / General
> [_] Retired
> [_] Student
>
> 11. To help us understand our customers' lifestyles, please indicate
> the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy
> participating on a regular basis:
>
> [_] Golf
> [_] Boating / sailing
> [_] Running / jogging
> [_] Sabotage
> [_] Propaganda / disinformation
> [_] Destabilization / overthrow
> [_] Black market / smuggling
> [_] Collectibles / collections
> [_] Watching sports on TV
> [_] Interrogation / torture
> [_] Household pets
> [_] Crushing rebellions
> [_] Espionage / reconnaissance
> [_] Border disputes
> [_] Mutually Assured Destruction
> [_] Fashion clothing
>
> Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your
> answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell
> Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to
> receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments,
> extremist groups, and mysterious consortia.
>
> As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to
> win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes!
(
geocities.com/southbeach/docks/Docks/4737) (
geocities.com/southbeach/docks/Docks) (
geocities.com/southbeach/docks) (
geocities.com/southbeach)