The door to the Saneejo Magicans' Guild library closed softly, and Master Sinar looked at the sleeping figure with a slight smile. Lilith was drooping over the reader, her head held between her paws. Sinar sat down opposite her and simply studied her for a minute rather thoughtfully and appreciatively, as if she were a rare scent to be treasured. He cleared his throat, but was unsurprised when that got no response. Carefully touching the life cords around Lilith, he put a bit of energy into her system in a few strategic spots.

Lilith's eyes opened and her head came up. "Oh! I'm sorry, Master Sinar, I didn't see you come in. I guess the events of last night are catching up to me."

"Yes, I would say so, Adept. It looks like you needed that sleep."

"Yes, I do.... or did, anyway." Lilith frowned a bit in puzzlement.

"I don't think you need too much now, Adept. I took care of that little detail for you."

"Oh! Oh. Well, thank you."

"There's no reason your duties should get you down, Adept. A simple little tweak to your system, and you won't need to spend all those hours sleeping. You can get on with your work."

"Maybe so... but don't those things have a price in the end?"

"Why should they, when it's done by an expert? I've watched you, and you can learn how to do it- which is more than I can say for a lot of dark side adepts."

"Maybe, but I don't know... you're disrupting a lot of things when you try to mess with your sleep cycle."

"Come now, surely you've got self confidence enough to handle that."

"Self confidence is one thing, sir, but presumption is totally different. I'm confident in what I know I can do, and am not afraid to try something new. That doesn't mean that I'm automatically going to succeed. No, I think I'd better pass up that offer."

Master Sinar stared at Lilith for a bit before replying, "but why? You could do so much better if you knew how to do without all of that time spent sleeping. It would be a really useful thing to know."

Lilith grinned. "Are you trying to tempt me, Master Sinar? If so, I refuse. That apple looks too juicy to not have a worm in it somewhere."

Sinar returned her smile. "Just about everyone can be tempted successfully, Adept, but it looks like tempting you with a better job performance won't succeed. That's something of a surprise, actually. The job is everything to most furs around here."

Lilith nodded. "That I don't doubt. And it is important to me, but recent events reminded me that I'm not going to do a good job if I lose myself in the process. I've already been through the fire too many times not to remember what got me there."

"Oh? What did?"

Lilith looked thoughtful. "How do I put it? It's one of those things that you know on a level that's hard to express in words. I guess... both times, I had expectations and perceptions of myself and the things around me that were unrealistic. Both times, I came down hard when hit with reality. I'm good, but not perfect. I have desires sometimes that might not seem pretty, but they're part of me to be used, not ignored."

"All of this self analysis makes you sound more like a light-side magician, Adept. Most dark-siders are more performence oriented than that."

"I have been, too, at times. But getting knocked down teaches you things."

"Perhaps. Some never do learn, though."

"Then they're the less for it."

"Very true."

Silence. Finally, Lilith cleared her own throat. "So, to what do I owe the honor, sir? I can't think you came in here simply to wake me up."

"No, that's true, I didn't know you were asleep. I just came to see how you were feeling, how things were going..."

"Anything in particular?"

"Everything concerning your health, Adept. For instance, I notice that your ears are looking a little red."

Lilith laughed ruefully. "I noticed, too. I'm fortunate that they aren't burned totally off."

"Oh?"

"Master Sechan decided to teach me a little 'lesson' this morning. It didn't go as well as he would have liked, but it was enough to give me some things to think about."

"I suppose that's all to the good, then. Of course, there are your long term health conditions as well, too."

"Like my new hand?"

"Yes, first on that list would probably be your hand."

"The hand is doing fine, sir. I really haven't noticed much change at all."

"No increased sensitivity? You don't have greater strength?"

Lilith grinned wryly. "Hardly. About the only thing unusual is that I sometimes have to concentrate a bit to get it going again after sending too much power through there."

"Hmm... so your life net is being disrupted by life currents." And what else are you not telling me, adept?

"I suppose so, yes. That wouldn't be unusual, I'd think- wouldn't it take a while to let the patterns become, oh, permanent?"

"It could, yes. As I said earlier, these cases are very uncertain. Mostly, your perception becomes reality."

"Great! Then I declare that this is a superhand, so all my worries are over."

Master Sinar laughed, and Lilith grinned as well. "If only it were that easy, Adept. But it never is, as you know. Many times we will find that our desires are not always based on the simple motives we want them to be."

Lilith grimaced. "How true."

"In fact, the problems you are experiencing might be helped if you'd give me more details. Just what kind of power currents are we talking about? Are you doing the same thing each time? Is there some sort of common thread to it all?" In other words, just what is the problem, anyway.

"Well.... usually I'm using my staff of office when it happens."

"Oh?"

"Yes, umm... how do I put this... somehow, when you direct a life current through it it sends back echoes and twists it in some unpredicable ways. I've had the backlash overpower things sometimes."

"That doesn't sound too good. Maybe I should take a look at it."

"No need to bother. It's made of some strange material- it's wood that has been turned to stone. I suspect it's some sort of odd grain caused by that."

"Hmm, perhaps." Perhaps it is, but either way you don't want me to look at it. Very interesting, adept. "So, what were you reading that was so boring?"

"Oh, this. Guild rules, the section on stations and their charters."

"What were you going to find in there?"

"I was wonderng just how legal it is to charge for an overnight stay rather than put it on guild credit. This is the first time I've ever seen that done."

"And your conclusions?"

Lilith sighed. "None. I need a copy of the station charter so I know what sections apply... and even just the original charter might not help, you need the revised and updated version as it stands now. You wouldn't happen to know where that is, would you?"

"I assumed it was in here somewhere- don't those rules state that the charter must be available to all magicians of adept or higher in rank?"

"Yeah, they do, but I don't want to make a scene by demanding to see them. Far easier just to look without bothering anyone."

"Far easier to do what you want without attracting unwelcome attention, perhaps?" Lilith's ears flicked as Master Sinar smiled. "Yes, I thought so. I can certainly understand a desire for discretion in such a matter. After what I've heard of you from various sources, your every action is going to be analyzed and re-analyzed for any possible threats."

"You're probably right. Although why they'd do that is.... well, maybe it isn't beyond me. I've always considered myself pretty straightforward, though."

"Straightforward to yourself, yes. But that doesn't mean simple. You appear to have a fine mind, Adept, and I suspect that you are skilled at figuring out a lot of things. Perhaps too many things for some furs."

"It's hardly like I'm on a crusade or anything, sir. But I have to admit that since I came here, I've not cared for the way I've been used- or pressured, either. I seem to have been dropped into the middle of a struggle that I didn't even try to create."

"Most of the adepts here seem content- relatively so, anyway."

"Not all. I know a couple who don't feel fully welcome."

"True. I suppose you would at that."

Lilith looked at Master Sinar sharply. And just what was that supposed to imply? "Anyhow, now that I'm in this, there's no way out, so I need to move forward somehow. Just sitting around doing nothing, or trying to ignore things, is simply going to make me a target for anything that comes up. Playing target is not a good way to live."

"No, it wouldn't be. So I assume you had other ideas as to who is going to be the target?"

"Maybe. It all depends on what I find out from the records- and from others around here."

"Looking for anyone or anything in particular yet, besides the station charter?"

"Well, a surface look seems to point towards the top, shall we say."

"The guildmaster himself?"

Lilith nodded. "I don't think I'm really qualified to pass any final judgements, but he seems to be the main source of a lot of trouble."

Sinar laughed. "I think he'd say the same thing about you, adept."

Lilith grinned back. "I'm sure he would. Maybe I'd better start watching my own back a little more closely. Of course, a good plan of attack would help, too. So far, I'm not even sure what or where to attack, much less how. That's sort of what I was looking for here."

Sinar nodded soberly. "You need to be very careful before you do anything, adept. This isn't a game. The stakes are a lot more than a few bronze demis."

"I know. It's measured in lives, and the goals are success or failure in those lives."

"True. So what would success be in your life, adept?"

"Hmm... well, right now it would be ridding this town of its crime troubles, I suppose. A better atmosphere around here wouldn't hurt any, either."

"No goals about self-realization?"

Lilith shook her head. "That's not a once in a lifetime goal, sir, it's a daily process- a way of life. You don't just find some magic key that makes you realize what you are for all time. It's an interactive process between what you want and what you have, with the goal being to merge the two as harmoniously as possible. But I guess I don't have to tell you all of that, you know it already."

There was silence in the study. Lilith began to look concerned at Master Sinar's extended silence while he seemed to stare thoughtfully past her shoulder. Finally he said, "yes, a very fine mind indeed. If I could be permitted a bit of partiality, I would say it was a shame you decided to become a dark side magician."

"It was the only way out of my mess at the time, sir. At least, the only way out as far as I could see."

"Have you ever considered changing?"

Lilith shook her head. "No. I know my abilities, and I'm definitely suited more to the dark side than the light."

"Very well. I'm sure you've spent more time considering it than I have. Good luck in your search, adept. In all of them, in fact."

"Thank you, sir. I think I'll be getting out for a while this evening- patrol duties, you know. Got to keep an eye on things."

Master Sinar laughed gently. "Yes, I'm sure you'll do a good job of that. Good afternoon, adept."

He left without a further word, and Lilith was left to chew over the conversation. After a bit of thinking, she realized that she had been very deftly opened and examined without getting much in the way of a return. Master Sinar had seemed sympathetic, but there had been no offers of help, only a reassuring presence of sorts. But with that presence gone, a cold hard look revealed little in the way of a definite commitment. Somehow, she wasn't surprised- but it didn't make her very happy, either.