Every once in a while, something good turns out to be bad.
And if it's bad, it could get ugly...

Good: You made plans to meet your on-line submissive.
Bad: She's might be really late.
Ugly: She's got to see if her mother will let her skip her Girl Scout meeting that day.

Good: You got invited to a play party.
Bad: It's at Dr. Kevorkian's place.
Ugly: You're the guest of honor.

Good: Master is horny and he takes you right there on the kitchen table.
Bad: He breaks a few dishes by sweeping them out of the way.
Ugly: Your parents weren't done eating yet.

Good: You ordered your husband to cross-dress and took him to a straight bar for a humiliation scene.
Bad: He refused to shave his beard.
Ugly: He got asked out and you didn't.

Good: Master bought a new toy.
Bad: It's a 10' long bullwhip.
Ugly: He knows what he's doing, he saw all three Indiana Jones movies.

Good: Your slave likes sex.
Bad: With men in uniform.
Ugly: You live a block away from the military base.

Good: You surprised your Dom by renting a porno flick he hadn't seen.
Bad: It's an amateur production.
Ugly: His mother is the star.

Good: Your girlfriend discovered she's kinky.
Bad: Kinkier than you.
Ugly: Your doberman wants to do it again.

Good: You explain your rules to a potential sub.
Bad: He keeps interrupting.
Ugly: With corrections.

Good: You found a great pair of nipple clamps.
Bad: In the laundry.
Ugly: In the pocket of your 10-year old son's pants.

Good: Mistress decided to expand your relationship.
Bad: It will now be polyamorous.
Ugly: With your parents.

Good: Your Top wants you to masturbate for him.
Bad: You can't remember where you left your vibrator.
Ugly: Your daughter found a rocket ship for her Barbie doll.

Good: You open the door and greet your Master in the nude.
Bad: He was already home.
Ugly: You weren't.

Good: You've got e-mail.
Bad: It's from your boss.
Ugly: It's a reply to your personal on alt.personals.bondage.

Good: Mistress is exploring her spiritual side.
Bad: She's becoming very religious.
Ugly: She joined a convent.

Good: Great outdoor sex with your Dom.
Bad: Neither of you heard the car pull up.
Ugly: Your uncle arrested him.

Good: Your Domme wants you to take care of her hot pussy now.
Bad: You break the speed limit getting to her house.
Ugly: You get to take Fluffy to the vet.

Good: Master calls and asks if you want something hot tonight when he gets home.
Bad: You didn't realize it meant he was ordering Chinese food.
Ugly: The deliveryman got hysterical when you answered the door buck naked.

Good: Master came home for a lunchtime quickie.
Bad: You weren't expecting him.
Ugly: The line was already out the door.

Good: Your absent minded slave remembered to clean the house AND cook dinner.
Bad: Your flogger is missing.
Ugly: The calimari tastes like leather.