Stupid Samuel

It was a quiet afternoon in a quiet street. Everyone was taking their siestas. Everyone, except "Stupid Samuel."

"Stupid Samuel" was the name that the barrio people coined and gave to a boy of eight, with small hands and small feet, and whose face was dotted with pimenta-sized freckles. He also was a pygmy, like his fellow villagers. But he was a different kind of pygmy, he was "Stupid Samuel" and he was proud of it.

Instead of taking his siesta, "Stupid Samuel" was now taking his merienda. He was now sitting under a growth of bougainvillea, near some cobblestones, eating the remains of his favorite fruits -- avocados, papayas, star apples, and guavas -- which he stole from the nearby palanque. He had forgotten to bring some peso coins out from the abaca box.

He also had forgotten to join the fiesta held this morning, and eat there because he was too busy looking at one of the 3-D frames brought by some American tourists. He could never understand what people saw in these pictures. He turned it upside-down. He placed it on the floor. He held it up by the window, near the light. He pressed it close to his eyes. He wore his mother's glasses. And he still could never figure it out. No wonder why he was called "Stupid Samuel."

"Stupid Samuel" had snapped out of his reverie only when he heard his neighbor's dog yelping. He never knew what breed it was, he only knew it was a "local." And then he was never sure whether it was a "him" or a "her." "Stupid Samuel" never knew how to look.

His mother never taught him anything. She never taught him things that she deemed unnecessary to learn. For instance, she never taught him that the donut-like structure near their cottage implied emptiness or hunger. "Stupid Samuel," being stupid, only thought that it just was a donut-shaped sculpture.

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"Stupid Samuel" was always a sensation in his barrio. Tourists who sometimes passed by would loudly inquire about the boy who had no clothes on. "Oh that will be Stupid Samuel," the villagers would say. And when the travellers wanted to know the story behind the boy's nakedness, they would always have this answer: "We are trying to find out."

It was in the year 1986 when the people in the village began trying to find out the reason why "Stupid Samuel" did not wear any clothes. This trend had actually started one day, when the Governor-General, who was once a guerilla chief, visited the small town. There was a parade and a fiesta being held in his honor. In the crowd was "Stupid Samuel," who was stark naked as a newborn baby, wearing only his papa's sombrero, which was too big for his head, when the General, riding a kalesa, passed by. The General was incredulous at the boy's impertinence -- or so he thought it was -- and stopped the horse-drawn carriage. He demanded from the boy's parents, who was then at their son's side, the answer to the question burning in his mind. "Seņor, Seņora," he said and paused, first swallowing his anger. Then with a wide flourish of his hand, the general asked, "What is the meaning of this?" The father's answer was just a nervous laugh, and the mother had just said, "Jesu Cristo! Do forgive him, he's only a little boy. They don't call him 'Stupid Samuel' for nothing."

But the General was not sated with this reply, and so he told his compadres to reward those villagers who knew the answer with a sack of rice. Since, then "Stupid Samuel" became a riddle, waiting to be solved.

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"Stupid Samuel" finished eating his merienda and was now looking up at the sky. The villagers had said that the clouds did have meaning. Once, he remembered, the people were pointing at the sky and were saying, "Oh no! The sky is red! Virgin Mary is angry!" And the people had looked down and saw "Stupid Samuel" covered up with red spots, and they had said, "Here is the cause of our tribulation! We must let him do his penitence!" But her mother, who heard this, had said, "Stop! The boy only has measles." "Stupid Samuel" had been momentarily shocked, and had been prepared to defend himself with his small fists. He had believed what the barrio people were saying. He had believed himself too young and too naive to understand and to see through things. He had believed that "Only the wise could see."

It was now late afternoon, and the people in the barrio were waking up from their siestas. Through the small windows of their hut, they saw "Stupid Samuel" poking at, or playing with, something. "Stupid Samuel" was actually consoling a dog abandoned by some American visitors. It was a fine dog, unlike his neighbor's. It was wearing a tiara and regal clothes. "Stupid Samuel" wondered why people did not leave dogs as they were, instead of dressing them up. To him, this act was an oppression of identity.

So "Stupid Samuel" was trying to take the ornaments and the costume off the dog, when villagers, who mistook the attempt for an act of torture, came out and yelled, "Stop, Stupid Samuel. Stop hurting the poor doggie!" And then together, from habit, and with a synchronized motion, they looked up at the sky and shouted, "Look! The clouds! They look like dinosaurs! And they are sipping tea from their teacups! San Juan! San Pedro! This is bad." After leaving the naked "Stupid Samuel" behind, who was looking at them with innocent eyes as wide as saucers, the villagers fled the barrio, only to come back later, saying, "O Dios! What a mistake."

Copyright 1997 by Blue.