I Can Name That Penis in 5 Strokes:
* The Alkaseltzer Penis: Pop, pop, fizz, fizz...Oh, what a relief it is..
* The All-State penis: You're in good hands.
* The American Express Penis: Don't leave home without it.
* The AT&T penis: Reach out and touch someone.
* The Avis penis: Trying harder than ever.
* The Beatles penis: Now a quarter smaller than it used to be.
* The Beef penis: It's what's for dinner.
* The Bic Lighter penis: Go ahead flick my bic!
* The Big Red penis: It's longer with big red.
* The Borden penis: It's GOT to be good.
* The Bounty Penis: The quicker picker-upper.
* The Budweiser penis: This bud's for you!
* The Burger King penis: Have it your way..
* The C&C music factory penis: Makes you go hmmmmm...
* The California Lotto penis: Who's next?
* The Cambells soup penis: Mmm mmm good!
* The Captain Planet penis: Go PENIS!!
* The Champion penis: The official penis of the '96 U.S.A olympic team.
* The Charmin double roll penis: It lasts longer because it is longer.
* The Chevy penis: Like a rock.
* The Chips Ahoy penis: Betcha bite a chip. (huh?)
* The Citibank visa penis: It's everywhere you want to be.
* The Cobain penis: It blows itself away.
* The Coca Cola penis: Always the Real Thing.
* The Crest penis: Recommended by 3 out of 4 dentists.
* The Dairy Queen penis: Hot eats, cool treats (we treat you right)
* The Dial penis: Aren't you glad you use it? Don't you wish everybody did?
* The Diet Pepsi penis: You got the right one, baby.
* The Diet Coke penis: Just for the taste of it...
* The Domino's Pizza penis: Delivers in 30 minutes or less!
* The Doublemint penis: Double your pleasure, double your fun!
* The Doublemint penis: Chewing really satisfies.
* The Energizer penis: It keeps going and going...
* The Equal Penis: Tastes like Sugar.
* The Excedrin Penis: It's tthhhhiiiiiiissss big.
* The Extra penis: Lasts an extra extra extra long time!
* The Flintstone's Vitamins penis: 10 million strong and growing!
* The Ford penis: The best never rest.
* The Frosted Flakes penis: They're GGGRRRRRREEEEAAAAATTT!
* The General Electric penis: We bring good things to life!
* The Generic penis: One size fits all.
* The George of the Jungle penis: Watch out for that....tree?
* The Gillette penis: The best a man can get.
* The Jell-o penis: Watch it wiggle, watch it jiggle...
* The Jewel penis: Take a new look at an old friend.
* The Jolly Green *Giant* penis: Self-explanatory
* The Juicy Fruit penis: The taste is gonna move ya.
* The Kix penis: Kid tested, mother approved.
* The Lays penis: Betcha can't eat just one!
* The Life penis: Mikey likes it.
* The Life Call Penis: It's fallen and it can't get up.
* The Little Caesar's penis: Penis!! Penis!! or Pleaser! Pleaser!
* The Lucky Charms penis: They're magically delicious!
* The Macintosh penis: It does more, it costs less, it's that simple.
* The Magnavox Penis: Smart. Very Smart.
* The McDonald's penis: Over 8 billion served.
* The McDonald's penis: Have you had your break today?
* The MCI penis: For friends and family!
* The MicroMachines penis: A whole world, in the palm your hand.
* The Microsoft penis: Where do you want to go today?
* The Miller Lite penis: Great taste, less filling
* The M&M penis: Melts in your mouth, not in your hand!
* The Mortal Kombat penis: Nothing can prepare you.
* The New York Lotto penis: Cause hey - you never know.
* The Nike penis: Just do it.
* The Nintendo penis: Now you're playing with power.
* The Nuprin Penis: Little, Yellow, Different.
* The Nyquil penis: The nighttime coughing, sneezing, runny nose, itching, burning, so you can't rest penis.
* The Pizza Hut penis: Makin' it great.
* The Pringles penis: Once you pop, you can't stop...
* The Purdue penis: More meat, less bone.
* The Ragu penis: Comes out chunkier than the rest.
* The Right Guard penis: Anything less is uncivilized.
* The Robitussin penis: Used by nine out of ten moms.
* The Robutussin penis: Recommended by Dr. Mom...
* The Sanka Penis: Good to the last drop!
* The Sears penis: Come see the softer side.
* The Secret penis: Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.
* The Sega penis: PENIS!
* The Siskel & Ebert penis: 2 thumbs up...
* The Snickers Penis: It satisfies you.
* The Sprite Penis: Image is nothing... Taste is everything.
* The Starburst penis: The juice is loose!
* The Star Trek penis: To Boldly Go Where No Man Has Gone Before.
* The Taco Bell penis: Get some; make a run for the border
* The Timex penis: Takes a lickin and keeps on.......
* The Tombstone penis: What would you like on your penis?
* The Tootsie Roll Pop Penis: How many licks DOES it take ...?
* The Toyota penis: I love what you do for me!
* The Toyota penis: Oh,what a feeling.
* The Transformers penis: It's more than meets the eye.
* The Twizzler penis: It makes mouths happy.
* The Uncle Sam penis: We want you.
* The Virginia Slims penis: You've come a long way, baby!
* The Wendy's penis: Where's the beef?
* The Wizard of Oz penis: "Oh my!"