the following is an exact copy of a signature in my guestbook that i just now noticed. whoever this guy (or very masculine gal) is, i would like to congratulate him/her on being the world's smartest man. i love the extremely deep and intelligent use of vocabulary, as well as the excellent spelling of the word "where's" (which you could learn by simply reading a child's puzzle book). nevertheless, this person is so great, i made a page dedicated to him! here it is, the smartest person in the world's guestbook signature.
name: The Man e-mail address: The Place homepage url: http://www.theman.com what's your favorite day of the week?: WEDNESDAY are you cool?: Liquid Nitrogen do you like to have sex with dead pink bunnies? Yes questions/comments/complaints?: You must be a bitch. No, that's an insult to bitches. You are a ho aren't you? Have you slept around on your girlfriend lately? I'm sure you must have. Information is a commodity. Friendship is a gift. However, you, my horribly ugly friend are only as friendly until you can use and abuse what you had. You're a user. You get off having your way. Your ego need recalibrating. I should introduce myself to your girlfriend one of these days. I am certain she could use a real man; one that appreciates her. So ho, warez your pride. You can stick this in your filez and hope we never meet because if we do, I am going to kick your balls so far up your body that people can honestly call you four eyes. Have a shitty day. Monday December 7th 1998 08:54:18
now i'm not sure if this strange person was serious in his allogations (if he knows what those are), or if it was a really bad joke perpetrated (ooh, another big word) by one of my friends, or not-so-friends. well i'm wasting my web space and time writing all this, so i think it's time i left the world's smartest person to his belligerant, slanderous, and altogether totally lame signing of people's guestbook. the least he could've done is left a real e-mail address or web page url, instead of acting like a little coward and putting "the man" and "the place". if you read the book, and are looking for this, it isn't there, as i have removed it in all its grace. now don't call me a hypocrite, all of you whose argument is that i "hacked" into someone's page. if anyone reading this knew or understanded the circumstances which i am under, you would condone my mean and somewhat immature reaction to what i think was a pretty large violation of my own rights. by the way, i have lessened the damages to that page now, but i'm not giving it back. sorry to dissappoint anyone. remember the age-old statement, do as i say, not as i do. i hope someone learned something here. thanks for your time.