~@~JuLeS FaVORiTe eMaiLS~@~

Emails ~@~JuLeS FaVORiTe eMaiLS~@~ There's a lot of great stuff being passed around through email. I thought I'd just use this page to post some of my favorites. If you have anything funny or inspirational please send it to me. Thanks!

****45 FUN THINGS YOU CAN DO ON AN ELEVATOR:
MAKE RACE CAR NOISES WHEN ANYONE GETS ON OR OFF.
BLOW YOUR NOSE AND OFFER TO SHOW THE CONTENTS OF YOUR KLEENEX TO OTHER PASSENGERS.
GRIMACE PAINFULLY WHILE SMACKING YOUR FOREHEAD AND MUTTERING: "SHUT UP, ALL OF YOU JUST SHUT UP!"
WHISTLE THE FIRST SEVEN NOTES OF "IT'S A SMALL WORLD" INCESSANTLY.
SELL GIRL SCOUT COOKIES.
ON A LONG RIDE, SWAY SIDE TO SIDE AT THE NATURAL FREQUENCY OF THE ELEVATOR.
SHAVE.
CRACK OPEN YOUR BRIEFCASE OR PURSE, AND WHILE PEERING INSIDE ASK: "GOT ENOUGH AIR IN THER?"
OFFER NAME TAGS TO EVERYONE GETTING ON THE ELEVATOR. WEAR YOURS UPSIDE-DOWN.
STAND SILENT AND MOTIONLESS IN THE CORNER, FACING THE WALL, WITHOUT GETTING OFF.
WHEN ARRIVING AT YOUR FLOOR, GRUNT AND STRAIN TO YANK THE DOORS OPEN, THEN ACT EMBARRASSED WHEN THEY OPEN BY THEMSELVES.
LEAN OVER TO ANOTHER PASSENGER AND WHISPER: "NOOGIE PATROL COMING!"
GREET EVERYONE GETTING ON THE ELEVATOR WITH A WARM HANDSHAKE AND ASK THEM TO CALL YOU ADMIRAL.
ON THE HIGHEST FLOOR, HOLD THE DOOR OPEN AND DEMAND THAT IT STAY OPEN UNTIL YOU HEAR THE PENNY YOU DROPPED DOWN THE SHAFT GO "PLINK" AT THE BOTTOM.
DO TAI CHI EXERCISES.
STARE, GRINNING, AT ANOTHER PASSENGER FOR A WHILE, AND THEN ANNOUNCE: "I'VE GOT NEW SOCKS ON!"
MEOW OCCASIONALLY.
BET THE OTHER PASSENGERS YOU CAN FIT A QUARTER IN YOUR NOSE.
FROWN AND MUTTER "GOTTA GO, GOTTA GO" THE SIGH AND SAY "OOPS!"
SHOW OTHER PASSENGERS A WOUND AND ASK IF IT LOOKS INFECTED.
SING "MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB" WHILE CONTIUALLY PUSHING BUTTONS.
HOLLER "CHUTES AWAY!" WHENEVER THE ELEVATOR DESCENDS.
WALK ON WITH A COOLER THAT SAYS "HUMAN HEAD" ON THE SIDE.
STARE AT ANOTHER PASSENGER FOR A WHILE, THEN ANNOUNCE "YOU'RE ONE OF THEM!" AND MOVE TO THE FAR CORNER OF THE ELEVATOR.
BURP, AND THEN SAY "MMM...TASTY!"
LEAVE A BOX BETWEEN THE DOORS.
ASK EACH PASSENGER GETTING ON IF YOU CAN PUSH THE BUTTON FOR THEM.
WEAR A PUPPET ON YOUR HAND AND TALK TO OTHER PASSENGERS "THROUGH".
START A SING-ALONG.
WHEN THE ELEVATOR IS SILENT, LOOK AROUNG AND ASK "IS THAT YOUR BEEPER?"
PLAY THE HARMONICA.
SHADOW BOX.
SAY "DING!" AT EACH FLOOR.
LEAN AGAINST THE BUTTON PANEL.
SAY "I WONDER WHAT ALL THESE DO" AND PUSH THE RED BUTTONS.
LISTEN TO THE ELEVATOR WALLS WITH A STETHOSCOPE.
DRAW A LITTLE SQUARE ON THE FLOOR WITH CHALK AND ANNOUNCE TO THE OTHER PASSENGERS THAT THIS IS YOUR "PERSONAL SPACE."
BRING A CHAIR ALONG.
TAKE A BITE OF A SANDWICH AND ASK ANOTHER PASSERNGER: "WANNA SEE WHA IN MUH MOUF?"
BLOW SPIT BUBBLES.
PULL YOUR GUM OUT OF YOUR MOUTH IN LONG STRINGS.
CARRY A BLANKET AND CLUTCH IT PROTECTIVELY.
MAKE EXPLOSION NOISES WHEN ANYONE PRESSES A BUTTON.
STARE AT YOUR THUNB AND SAY "I THINK IT'S GETTING LARGER."
IF ANYONE BRUSHES AGAINST YOU, RECOIL AND HOLLER "DON'T TOUNCH!"