My tire was thumping,
I thought it was flat,
When I looked at the tire,
I found your cat,

Sorry!
You had your bladder removed,
And you're on the mend.
Here's a bouquet of flowers
and a box of depends.

Heard your wife left you.
How upset you must be!
Don't fret about your wife though;
she's living with me.

Your computer is dead
And it was so alive.
You shouldn't have installed
Windows 95

You totalled your car
and can't remember why?
maybe it was
That case of Bud dry.

So you lost your job,
It's one of those hardships in life.
Next time, work harder
and stay away from the boss's wife.

Happy vasectomy!
Hope you feel zippy!
'cause when I got one,
I got real snippy.

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