A GUIDE TO HAVING AN AFFAIR!
By SeeFlint

1) Practice safe sex; talk about your health openly ahead of time either in person, e-mail, by phone etc. Get it out of the way so you can have safe fun together.

2) Honesty, honesty and honesty on both sides, of course. I will explain further down in number twelve.

3) Be careful and use discretion on where you two meet. Try to go out of town where no one knows either of you and don�t skimp on the meeting place; please let it be an extra special time together. If you see someone you know make sure to say hello to him or her. Be friendly and ask them if they�re here in business too. Keep it short and get back to your client (only you know it�s your lover).

4) Always plan ahead and bring cash, it�s untraceable. If it�s a legitimate company expense, then great, don�t worry.

5) Who pays? Work that out before time so it won�t interfere with your special time together.

6) Always touch base with each another; never leave the other person hanging or guessing when you might call again. Remember waiting for someone that is unreachable is a horrible and lonely feeling. Always treat your lover that way you want to be treated.

7) An affair can be very exciting so savor that moment. A successful affair can heighten every one of your senses so let it happen very naturally. It�s so damn naughty.

8) Relax, enjoy and don�t forget to laugh together and be a little silly.

9) Before you remove any of your clothing make sure to hang up your ego first. Just be yourself, relax and you will be a better lover. The best way to remember what you say is not to lie.

10) Important rule: try not to talk about your family, work, health, money and personal problems. Explore fantasies and desires together. Never put down your spouses or lovers and if you do mention them speak of them fondly. Don�t build up your ego by putting them down; remember you should have hung up your ego at the door.

11) Don�t play head games and don�t make promises you won�t or can�t keep-- not fair to either of you. Always remember this is a wonderful affair and not a mating ritual.

12) Now for the honesty part, you have three choices here that I can think of: 1) Open marriage affair; that�s where your spouse or lover knows about everything and it�s ok. 2) Secretive affair, that�s where no one knows about it and you want to keep it that way. 3) The sloppy affair, that�s where you want to get caught but you don�t know it because you are really foolish. I personally like the first one because no one gets hurt but not so easy to do. I understand that. Two is not so easy either but can be done well if you think with your big head first. The third is the most common, sad to say. In most affairs when you get caught it�s shocking and very upsetting to the spouse or lover and not so much about sex; it�s because of the lying and cheating. It�s very degrading and humiliating to your spouse or lover, so be respectful if you�re going to have an affair and be damn careful.

13) If you do get caught, remember you are wrong so keep your mouth shut, listen, admit to everything and work on saving the marriage if that�s what you want. Again, be honest and when things calm down a little, talk openly about why you think you had the affair without putting your spouse or lover down. Don�t say you won�t do it again if you don�t mean it. If you feel you must see your affair lover again, talk about that and tell why. Remember your affair love is a person with feeling too. Concentrate on your spouse�s or lover�s feelings and how you two are going to work on the marriage. If you think you will keep seeing your affair lover then talk about that with your spouse and if you can�t then end it and that is ether one. Talk about why it might have happened. Was it because the marriage got boring, lack of sex, falling out of love? Whatever it is just talk openly and honestly. Don�t blame your spouse they are the victim here. Please accept responsibility for your own actions. Understand that the husband, wife or lover is going to be really angry, hurt, humiliated and completely irrational etc. so try to stay calm. If you both can�t talk about this then get help together before calling it quits, if that�s were it�s at.

14) Try to save the marriage. It�s cheaper and less complicated for both of you.

15) Be honest with the person you�re having the affair with and keep them up-to-date on how you feel and what�s happening at all times. Don�t play head games. It doesn�t feel very good to anyone and I know you know what I mean here.

16) Lastly, when the affair starts to feel like your married, then it�s over.

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