_{Q: How can you tell if a man is sexually excited???
A: He's breathing.}

_{Q: What is the difference between a man and ET???
A: ET phoned home.}

_{Q: What's a man's idea of foreplay?
A: A half hour of begging.}

_{Q: What did God say sfter creating the man?
A: I can do better.}

_{Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?
A: Because they have no balls to scratch.}

_{Q: What do man and bottles have in commen?
A: They are both empty from the neck up.}

_{Q: What do you call a man with half a brain?
A: Gifted.}

_{Q: What does a man consider as a seven course meal?
A: A hot dog and six pack.}

_{Q: What do you have when you have two balls in your hand?
A: A man's undivided attention.}

_{Q: Why are men like laxatives?
A: They both irritate the shit out of you.}

_{Q: What are two reasons men don't mind their business?
A: 1. No mind  2. No business}

_{Q: How are men and parking spots alike?
A: The good ones are always taken.}

_{Q: Why is it hard for women to find men who are sensitive,    caring and good lokking?
A: Because those men already have boyfriends.}

_{Q: How is a men like a snowstorm?
A: Because you don't know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long he'll stay.}

_{Q: Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
A: So they wouldn't hump women's leg at cocktail parties.}