The Top 51 worst pick up lines

  1. Your name must be Daisy, because I have the incredible urge to plant you right here!
  2. Roses are red, violets are blue, I like spaghetti, let's go screw.
  3. Just call me milk, I'll do your body good.
  4. Your body's name must be visa, because it's everywhere I want to be.
  5. Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
  6. I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your BedRock.
  7. I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
  8. My love for you is like the energizer bunny; it keeps going and going....
  9. That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you I'd be coming too.
  10. Yo Baby, you be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King; you treat me right, and I'll do it your way right away.
  11. I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.
  12. I enjoy doing maintenance; you look like someone I would like to "tinker" around with.
  13. You must be from Pearl Harbor, cause baby you're the Bomb.
  14. If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.
  15. Is that Windex? Because I can see myself in your pants.
  16. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?
  17. I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Walmart, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.
  18. Wanna Play House? You be the screen door and I'll slam you all night long.
  19. If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.
  20. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
  21. If you were a car, I'd wax you and ride you all over town.
  22. Guy: "Would you like to dance?" Girl: "I don't care for this song and surely wouldn't dance with you." Guy: "I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me, I said you look fat in those pants."
  23. Excuse me, can I have your phone number? I seem to have lost mine.
  24. I look good on you.
  25. I'm new in town, could I have directions to your house?
  26. If your left leg was Thanksgiving and your right leg Christmas, could I visit you between the Holidays?
  27. You look like a girl that has heard every line in the book, so what's one more going to hurt?
  28. Fuck me if I'm wrong, but is your name Yolanda?
  29. I love every bone in your body - especially mine.
  30. Excuse me, do you wanna fuck, or should I apologize?
  31. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
  32. Do you want to dance? No? Well I guess a fuck is out of the question.
  33. Hi, I'm a necrophiliac. How good are you at playing dead?
  34. I lost my bed, can I borrow yours?
  35. My recipe for love is one cup of you, one cup of me, knead till hard, and serve hot.
  36. Are your legs tired? Because you've been running through my mind all day long.
  37. You be the tree, and I'll wrap you like a Koala.
  38. Hey baby, I'm like American Express; you don't want to leave home without me.
  39. Do you have a quarter? My mother told me to call home when I met the girl of my dreams.
  40. The word for the night is legs; let's go back to my room and spread the word.
  41. Hey baby, what's your sign? Caution, slippery when wet, dangerous curves ahead, or yield?
  42. Hi my name is _______. Remember it, cause you'll be screaming it all night long.
  43. I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
  44. Was your dad a farmer? Cause you sure have great melons.
  45. Want to play conductor? You be the engineer and I'll go choo-choo.
  46. You must be Jelly, cause jam don't shake like that.
  47. The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.
  48. BEST COMEBACK: Guy: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?" Girl: "Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore"
  49. Hi, my name is Skippy. Like the peanut butter I stick to the roof of your mouth.
  50. Hi, my name is Pogo. Want to jump on my stick?
  51. And the 51st worst pick-up line will be the one your using now..he..he!!
    MORE STUPID PICK UP LINES

    *Inheriting eighty million dollars doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart.
    *Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number. Could I borrow yours?
    *What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply?
    *Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? "No" Want to go somewhere and talk?
    *Hey baby, want to see something swell?
    *Let's have a party and invite your pants to come on down.
    *Let's play house. You can be the door and I'll slam you
    *Let's play war. I'll lay down and you blow the hell out of me.
    *Wanna get some pizza and screw? "No" Why, don't you like pizza?
    *You have pretty eyeballs. Of course they'd be better if they were eyeing my pretty balls.
    *For you....I'd sleep in the wet spot.
    *You like apples? Well I'm gonna take you back to my place and fuck you! How do you like them apples?
    *Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see!
    *If I gave you a sexy negligee, would there be anything in it for me?
    *I'm new in town, could I get directions to your place?
    *Miss, if you've lost your virginity, could I have the box it came in?
    *If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?
    *She: (to passing man) Do you have the time? Him: Do you have the energy?
    *You know, you've got the prettiest teeth I've ever dreamed of coming across.
    *Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull your pockets inside out....) Would you like to?
    *(Grab her ass...) Pardon me, is this seat taken?
    *If I follow you home, will you keep me?
    *Go up to a girl and tell her she has nice legs....then ask would she mind if you named them. She says ok, and you say ok this one is Thanksgiving and that one is Christmas.....would you mind if I visited between the holidays?
    *Hi. I suffer from amnesia. Do I come here often?
    *As she's leaving....Hey aren't you forgetting something? She: What? Me!
    *Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy.
    *Hi, do you want to have my children? (assuming the answer is 'no') OK then, can we just practice?
    *You: I'm sorry, were you talking to me? Her: No. You: Well then, please start.
    *Pardon me, what pickup line works best with you?
    *Do you have a boyfriend....well if you want a MANfriend...
    *You see my friend over there? [Point to friend who sheepishly waves from afar] He wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.
    *Are you looking for Mr. Right, or Mr. Right Now?
    *Excuse me, miss, do you give head to strangers? No. Well, then, allow me to introduce myself.
    * He: You look like my third wife. She: Oh, how many time have you been married? He: Twice.

Click here for more jokes