Ya okay,
so here is a page of just stupid things to think about...or things that
just are. So sit back, read a bit...and absorb. Have fun!
Things that make you go Hmm...
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill him/herself, is it considered a hostage situation???
Is there another word for "synonym?"
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Where do forest rangers go to get away from it all???
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant???
Is it possible to be totally partial?
If the police arrest a mine, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
Why is
the word "abbreviation" so long?
I am sure sometime in your lifetime you have met someone that is, not always THERE...there are alot of ways of calling them stupid, but in a more polite manner...heres a few I dug up.
1. Your a few sandwiches short of a picnic.
2. You got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.
3. You have a photographic memory but the lens cover is still on.
4. You are a prime candidate for natural de-selection.
5. You are as bright as Saskatchewan in December.
6. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train ain't coming.
7. It takes you one-and-a-half hours to watch 60 minutes.
8. If you were more stupid, you'd have to be watered twice a week.
9. If you give him a penny for his/her thoughts, you'd get change.
10. You may have a full 6-pack, but you lack the plastic thingy to hold it all together.
11.
You are one neuron short of a synapse.
What
you didn't learn in English 101
English
is a crazy language. Half the time I spent time thinking about it
scratching my head, and it never makes sense if you sit and think about
it on a more logical side. Since when did chickens have fingers?
There is no ham in hamburgers? Apple nor pine in Pineapple?
Do noses run? feet that smell?? I can never figure it out...here
are some new clear words that I feel would improve todays english language.
1. ECNALUBMA n. A rescue vehicle which can only be seen in the rear view mirror.
2. CARPETUATION n. The act, when vaccuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vaccum one more chance.
3. DISCONFECT v. To sterilize the piece of candy you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will somehow "remove" all the germs.
4. ELBONICS n. The actions of two people maneuvering one armrest in a movie theater.
5. FRUST n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept up onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.
6. LACTOMANGULATION n. Manhandling the "open here" spout on a milk container so badly that one has to resort to the "illegal" side.
7. NEONPHANCY n. A fluorescent light bulb struggling to come to life.
8. PHONESIA n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.
9. PUPKUS n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its nose to it.
10. TELECRASTINATION ( tel e kras ay' shun) n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you are six inches away.
11.
REMOTESTRATION. n. The act of pushing the remote control button,
to change the channel on your tv, about 20 times sitting in your chair,
then getting up and moving closer to the tv, pushing it 20 more times,
then moving right up to the eye of the remote lens on the tv while pushing
the button and not changing it manually until you figure the batteries
are dead.
THATS ALL FOLKS, CATCH YOU ON THE FLIPSIDE!