Long Ago, In a Comedy Galaxy Far, Far Away..............

This Page is Devoted and Dedicated to the Science Fiction Fan with a sense of Humour:

I wish to express appreciation for Kahless, aka Vic Dakota, without whom thess pages (and my computer's nervous breakdown) would not be possible.

I shall update this on a regular basis and would greatly appreciate any input one cares to offer.

Star Trek

Borg Humour:

The Borg: Calm, Cool and Collective.

 

 

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    • Material Provided by:

    Kahless aka Vic Dakota as supplied to him by:

    Prophet319@msn.com
    IronMan319@aol.com
    Impulse319@aol.com
    http://www.oocities.org/Area51/Dimension/9770

    If Dr Seuss wrote for Star Trek, The Next Generation:
     Picard: Sigma Indri, that's the star
    So, Data, please, how far? How far?
    Data: Our ship can get there very fast
    But still the trip will last and last
    We'll have two days before we arrive
    But can the Indrans there survive?
    Picard: LaForge, please give us factor nine.
    Laforge: But, sir, the engines are offline!
    Picard: Offline! But why? I want to go!
    Please make it so, make it go!
    Riker: But sir, if Geordie says we can't,
    We can't, we musn't, and we shan't,
    The danger here is to great!    		  

     Picard: But surely we must not be late!
    Troi : I'm sensing anger and great ire.

    Computer: Alert! Alert! The ship's on fire!
    Picard: The ship's on fire? How could this be?
    Who lit the fire?
    Riker : Not me!
    Worf: Not me!
    Picard: Computer, how long til we die?
    Computer: Eight minutes left to say goodbye.
    Data: May I suggest a course to take?
    We could, I think, quite safely make
    Extinguishers from tractor beams
    and stop the fire, or so it seems....
    Geordi: Hurray! Hurray! You saved the day!
    Again I say, Hurray! Hurray!
    Picard: Mr Data, thank you very much
    You've saved our lives, our ship, and such.
    		 

     Troi : We must still save the Indran planet.......
    Data: Which (by the way) is made of granite...
    Picard: Enough, you android. Please desist.

    We understand...we get your gist.
    But can we make our ship to go?
    Please, make it so, make it be very so....
    Geordi: There's sabatoge amongst the wires
    and that's what started all the fires.
    Riker: We have a sabotuer? Oh No!
    We need to make this ship to go!
    Troi : We must seek out the traitor spy
    And lock him up and ask him why.
    Worf : Ask him why? How sentimental!
    I say give him problems dental!
    Troi : Are any Romulan ships around?
    Have scanners said that they've been found?
    Or is it Borg, or some new threat
    We haven't even heard of yet?
    I snese no malice in this crew.
    Now what are we supposed to do?
    Crusher: Captain, please the Indrans need us.
    They cry out, "Help us, clothe us, feed us!"
    I can't just sit and let them die!
    A doctor must attempt, we MUST try!
    Picard: Doctor, please we'll get there soon
    .Crusher: They may be dead by Tuesday noon.
    		 

    HOW LONG WILL THESE DUMB ADS TAKE?

     Worf : The saboteur is in the brig.
    He's very strong and very big.
    I had my phaser set on stun...

    A zzzip! A zzzap! Another one!
    He would not budge, he would not fall,
    He would not stun, no not at all!
    He changed into a stranger form
    All soft and purple, round and warm.
    Picard: Did you see this, Mr Worf?
    did you see this creature morph?
    Worf : I did and then I beat him fairly.
    Hit him on the jaw .... quite squarely.
    		 
     Riker: My commendations, Klingon friend!
    Our troubles now are at an end!
    Crusher: Now let's get our ship to fly.
    And orbit yonder Indran sky!
    Picard: LaForge, please tell me we can go...?
    Geordi: Yes sir we can...
    Picard: Then make it so!
    		 
     

    Script provided by Kahless, aka Vic Dakota Home

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