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Seems there was this newlywed couple getting ready for their first
night together. As they undressed the husband, who was a big man,
took his trousers off and tossed them to his bride. "Try these on."
She put them on and saw how big they were and she said "I can't fit
these!" "Right. That's the way it is. *I* wear the pants around
here!" The bride nodded and slipped out of her panties, tossed them
across to her husband and said "Put those on." He tried but they
would only go up to his knees. "I can't get into these things!"
"Right! And until you change your attitude, that's the way it's going
to be."
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A newlywed couple were spending their honeymoon in a remote
log cabin resort way up the mountains. They had registered on
Saturday and they had not been seen for 5 days. An elderly couple ran the resort, and they were getting concerned about the welfare of these newlyweds. The old man decided to go and see if everything was fine. He knocked on the door of the cabin and a weak voice from inside answered. The old man asked if they were OK. "Yes, we're fine. We're living on the fruits of love". The old man replied, "I thought so ... would you mind not throwing the peelings out the window ... they're choking my ducks!"
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A young couple were married, and celebrated their first night
together, doing what newlyweds do, time and time again, all night
long. Morning comes and the groom goes intothe bathroom but finds no
towel when he emerges from the shower. He asks the bride to please bring one from the bedroom. When she gets to the bathroom door, he opened the door, exposing his body for the first time to his bride where she sees all of him well. Her eyes went up and down and at about midway, they stopped and stared, and she asked shyly, "What's that?", pointing to a small part of his anatomy. He, also being shy, thought for a minute and then said, "Well, that's what we had so much fun with last night." And she, in amazement, asked, "Is that all we have left?"
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A man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted
to marry her right away. She said, "But we don't know
anything about each other." He said, "That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go along." So she consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort. So one morning they were lying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10 Meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, this followed by a three rotations in jackknife position, where he straightened out and cut the water like a knife. After a few more demonstrations, he came back and laid down on the towel. She said, "That was incredible!" He said, "I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along." So she got up, jumped in the pool, and started doing laps. After about thirty laps she climbed back out and laid down on her towel hardly out of breath. He said, "That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?" "No," she said, "I was a hooker in Venice and I worked both sides of the canal... |