10.	They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
9.	A better model is always just around the corner.
8.	They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.
7.	It is always necessary to have a backup.
6.	They'll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.
5.	The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
4.	In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
3.	The lights are on but nobody's home.
2.	Big power surges knock them out for the night.
1.	Size does matter

10.	They are impossible to figure out.
9.	Sometimes it's difficult to find the on/off button.
8.	They break down for no apparent reason.
7.	They communicate well only with each other.
6.	They are taking over the world.
5.	They age rapidly.
4.	Unless you use just the right language, you won't get a response.
3.	Once you take away their fancy accessories, they're really not much to much to look at.
2.	There is always a new generation coming along to replace the old.
1.	Size does matter.

10.	The monitor is up on blocks.
9.	Outgoing faxes have tobacco stains on them.
8.	The six front keys have rotted out.
7.	The extra RAM slots have Dodge truck parts stored in them.
6.	The numeric keypad only goes up to six.
5.	The password is "Bubba".
4.	There's a gun rack mounted on the CPU.
3.	There's a Skoal can in the CD-ROM drive.
2.	The keyboard is camouflaged.
1.	The mouse is referred to as a "critter".