Mental Heatlh Line

thank you for calling the automatic mental health line. Please listen to the following choices for touch tone phones.


OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVES....Press #1 repeatedly

CO-DEPENDENTS.....go get someone else to press #2 for you

PARANOID......Don't worry about pressing any buttons. We know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line and we'll trace the call

SCHIZOPHRENIC.....Listen carefully and the little voice will tell you which number to press

DEPRESSED....It doesn't matter what button you press, no one will answer

Thank you for calling 1-800-BONKERS. Have a Happy Prozac Day!!!!