FART CHART

VAIN PERSON : One who loves the smell of his own fart

AMBITIOUS : Always ready for a fart

LAZY : Just fizzles

AMIABLE : Likes to smell others' farts

PROUD : Thinks his farts are exceptionally pleasant

SHY : Blushes when he farts silently

CARELESS : Farts in church

SMART ALEC : Farts when ladies are present

CLEVER : Farts and coughs at the same time

SCIENTIFIC : Bottles his farts

STINGY : Belches to save his ass hole

TIMID : Jumps when he farts

CONCEITED : Thinks he can fart the loudest

UNFORTUNATE : Tries to fart but shits himself

FOOLISH : Suppresses a fart for hours

BEWILDERED : Can't tell his own fart from others

NERVOUS : Stops in the middle of a fart

MISERABLE : Can't fart at all

CONFUSED : Face is so much like an ass, fart can't tell which way to go

GROUCH : Grumbles when ladies fart

SNEAKY : Farts and blames it on the dog

DISSAPOINTED : Fart doesn't smell

CHILDISH : Farts and then giggles

FRESH GUY : Jumps in front of you and then farts

BIG BULLY : Farts louder than others

DUMB : Enjoys other farts, thinks they are his own

CUTE : Smells your farts and then tells you what you were eating

WISE GUY : Farts and asks who shit

DAMNED MEAN : Farts and then pulls the covers over his wife's head

MUSICAL : Tenor or Base, Clear as a bell, smells like shit and sounds like hell

ATHLETIC : Jumps in the air, farts 3 times, and kicks his heels 3 times

SLOB : Farts and stains his underwear

IMPUDENT : Farts out aloud and then laughs

ENVIRONMENTALIST : Farts regularly but is concerned about the pollution

HONEST : Admits he farted but offers a good medical reason

DISHONEST : Farts and then blames the dog

THRIFTY : One who always has farts in reserve

ANTI SOCIAL : Excuses himself and farts in private

STRATEGIC : Conceals his fart by loud laughter

INTELLECTUAL : Can determine the smell of his neighbours' fart

WHIMPY : Farts at the slightest exertion

SADIST : Farts in bed, then fluffs the covers

SENSITIVE : Farts and then starts crying

AQUATIC : Farts in bath, then breaks bubbles with toes

MASOCHIST : Farts in the bath tub and tries to bite the bubbles